


gates to heaven

by alovelyvixen



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alpha Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung, Alpha Nakamoto Yuta, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Cheating, Homophobia, Identity Issues, Love Triangles, M/M, Minor Violence, Omega Dong Si Cheng | WinWin, Omega Kim Jungwoo (NCT), Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Self-Hatred, Sex Toys, Slow Burn, Smut, best friends jungwoo and sicheng, dowoo, established doyoung and jungwoo, hidden omega sicheng, just guys being dudes yknow, like fights, sicheng is actually really sad okay, yuwin
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-10
Updated: 2019-12-18
Packaged: 2020-02-29 09:27:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 28
Words: 41,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18775483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alovelyvixen/pseuds/alovelyvixen
Summary: His room was safe. His bed right under the window as the blue moonlight through the sheer clouds of the setting sun beamed down onto his blankets, as if to warm them for him when he slept tonight. He set his plate down on his desk and sighed.Immediately, he became himself. His jaw unclenched, his eyes became wide, relaxed and innocent, his eyebrows arose from the place they normally found themselves furrowed unnaturally close to his eyes. A much softer and gentle demeanor took him over when he stepped into his room and shut the door. Sicheng’s body relaxed as he changed into comfortable clothes and settled into the curve of his body pillow to watch TV.Nobody ever came into his room. It was light, and airy, and it smelled like him. Everything was in place, and it was very personal to him. If he was a bird, this was his nest.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> yuh a story !! this been sitting in my google docs for a while and shes finally getting released,, as it is a story it will have chapters so please anticipate those!! enjoy !!!

At all times, Sicheng kept a harsh, tough face. Most people were scared of him, and rightfully so. Responses were often barked out, or delivered in a condescending tone. If his friends didn’t know any better, they would assume they he hated them and everyone in the world. In fact, they never even called him by his real name. WinWin, a nickname that came from god knows where, was what he preferred to go by. Even his one closest friend would call him that unless it was a matter of life and death.

 

 

This was all apart of his cover up. He was Alpha WinWin, who was easily angered and defensive even if there was nothing to defend, his guard was always up. There was no interest in finding omegas or betas to be his other half, as he was filling it with the fear he constantly felt at times. 

 

 

Currently, he was out having brunch and coffee with some of their friends. Few he could call friends, though, others were simply acquaintances. 

 

 

Jaehyun sat, telling a story about some drunk omega girl who’s boyfriend had to peel her off of him, because apparently his scent was so compelling. He was a heartthrob in the community, it was odd. Everyone knew his face, and most knew his name, and he was a hot commodity on the market.

 

 

“I don’t understand how she loved the scent of rotting dairy,” Sicheng took a sip of his coffee blankly as everyone cackled at his joke.

 

 

“Come on, Win, don’t be cold, I have quite a nice scent,” Jaehyun nudged him.

 

 

He looked over at him and wiped his lips. “I hope I catch a cold so I don’t have to smell you.”

 

 

Everyone laughed again, and, as if he were uninterested, Sicheng pulled out his phone to check it. Laughing was not ever in his schedule, but made he would crack a rigid smile now and then, or scoff. Most of his jokes were not funny, but rather snarky comments. All part of being a mean, tough alpha.

 

 

“It was fun sitting here and wallowing in a bath of repulsive hormones,” He stood up and reached over Ten to throw his cup away. “But I have to go and help Jungwoo make dinner.”

 

 

With a wave, he was out the door and in his car. Most all of their hangouts went like this, but they knew Sicheng meant the best, and it was all in friendly fun. For others, though, that rarely hung around them, he was rude. People either loved Alpha WinWin or they hated him. Did he care? No. It was all for show, as emotional security for his internal damage.

 

 

Once he got home, Jungwoo was setting up everything for him to cook. It was one thing he was very good at. “And how are you, Win? How was lunch with the gang?” Of course, Jungwoo was apart of that gang, he just had to stay home for hormonal reasons - since Doyoung was out at the moment. Probably getting more stuff.

 

 

“It was normal, I enjoyed the company but it was boring,” He leaned against the counter. “Go lay down, you’re going to get sweat in the food before I even heat it up,”

 

 

Jungwoo’s hair was messy, with clear sections where it was pulled and grasped tightly. His eyes were deepset, borderline rimming with tears. The way he moved his body was lax, as if he was floating around their apartment. And his face was shining with sweat, probably since more was being produced every moment that Doyoung was gone.

 

 

He didn’t mind the very loud and dirty fucking that happened opposite his bedroom wall, because it was normal. God knows he would be the same way it was him and someone else. Sicheng pushed Jungwoo out of the kitchen, telling him to wait for Doyoung on the couch.

 

 

“Come on, you’d be feeling the exact same way if you weren’t-”   


 

 

  
“No,” He growled.

 

 

“/And/ if you had a-”

 

 

“Stop it,” Sicheng pointed the knife he was using to finish preparing in his direction.

 

 

“Yeah, yeah, I know better. Sometimes I can’t help it. Especially in times like this, when it’s so enjoyable,” Jungwoo sighed and laid back on the couch.

 

 

There was a few moments paused before he began cooking before he peered over the counter. “You better not be doing anything on our couch. You have a room for a reason.”

 

 

His best friend whimpered and sat up. “My point stands, Win. I feel for you.”

 

 

Sicheng shook his head and kept cooking. There was no point in entertaining this conversation or the idea of having it when he was in heat and waiting for his boyfriend to return and break his back in the other room. Almost no thoughts went through his head as he made dinner. What did he have to do before he went to bed, how many days until he went to work, how much money did he have left in his bank account, all of that. Everything a standard, boring person thinks about. Nothing interesting ever went on his life worth retelling, after all.

 

 

“I’ll be eating in my room, and don’t fuck on the couch. I mean it,” Sicheng grabbed his plate and went into his room.

 

 

His room was safe. His bed right under the window as the blue moonlight through the sheer clouds of the setting sun beamed down onto his blankets, as if to warm them for him when he slept tonight. He set his plate down on his desk and sighed.

 

 

Immediately, he became himself. His jaw unclenched, his eyes became wide, relaxed and innocent, his eyebrows arose from the place they normally found themselves furrowed unnaturally close to his eyes. A much softer and gentle demeanor took him over when he stepped into his room and shut the door. Sicheng’s body relaxed as he changed into comfortable clothes and settled into the curve of his body pillow to watch TV. 

 

 

Nobody ever came into his room. It was light, and airy, and it smelled like him. Everything was in place, and it was very personal to him. If he was a bird, this was his nest.

 

 

Once he was done with his food, he settled into his bed. All warm, as he always expected; Sometimes he would thank the sun audibly for keeping an eye out for him. His hair messed up as he curled into a more comfortable position, now cuddling the body pillow.

 

 

Every night he fell asleep, just as comfortable as can be. Comfortable, and himself. This was who he wanted to be, who he really was, yet who he could only be in the confines of his room. Omega Sicheng.

 

 

+++


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yuta.

As he had entered earlier, he wasn’t sure that he was noticeable to anyone not talking directly to him or sitting beside him. He was munching on a sandwich, currently, and listening to the very alpha debate on what was considered a good date. Yuta hated talking like this, because it was personal. Though goofy and the most unserious person one would ever meet, he was considerate of sensitive topics.

 

 

He knew more people would join them, but he wasn’t sure who, because this was nearly everyone he knew. Their group was quite large, but he didn’t take a liking to everyone, and that was okay.

 

 

While he thought, puzzled, someone walked in. They looked very bold and commanding. With a black jacket, a dark blue turtleneck, and some jeans tucked into his shoes, he caught Yuta’s attention. Alphas normally never caught his attention unless he was asserting dominance, but this one was certainly looking nice to him. He wasn’t one to discriminate, either, because alphas being with alphas was not frowned upon these days. At times, his friends called him out for eyeing nearly every breathing soul around him.

 

 

After he saw him order coffee out of the corner of his eye, he turned away as he saw him coming this way. Guess he was the extra friend. Lucky him, since this would give him a chance to maybe know him slightly better.

 

 

He greeted them all as a collective, barely giving Yuta so much as a sliver of attention. It took him off guard when he simply sat there, making quips that were borderline bullying every time he got the chance. This guy was one of _those_  alphas. It was quite obvious, but he tried his hardest to be the opposite of that, and be one of the nicest people someone could meet.

 

 

As he watched him swim in his thoughts and sip his coffee, his gaze lingered over his features. His face was quite stiff and structured, even though he had some meat on his bones, ie, he was quite chubby faced for an alpha. What nice cheekbones he had, too, to really balance out the seriousness of his face. They probably raised so nicely when he smiled, but he felt like he would sit here and starve before he saw that.

 

 

Yuta’s thoughts were interrupted when he caught his name. Win. Odd, but he was just assuming it was a nickname.

 

 

His ears stuck out on each side of his head, but he didn’t notice any special features to them until he turned his head to look at Jaehyun. One stood, pointed, on the right side of his head, while the other rounded as normal. That was a soft detail.. He smiled to himself. Just as he was lingering and finding his way to his eyes, he tore his stare away as he had stood up and announced he was leaving.

 

 

Yet again, he got no attention, but still waved as he left.

 

 

Jaehyun scooted into his spot and leaned onto the table. “Oh, please fawn over me like that, I do love compliments,” He teased. “You couldn’t at least catch looks at him to try and be subtle. You are so lucky he is oblivious to what’s really happening around him, or else he would kick your ass.”

 

 

Yuta shook his head and dismissed it as him, too, getting lost in his thoughts and simply looking in his direction. After all, he was currently chasing after, and catching up to, another omega, of course.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh? what's this? the story from yuta's perspective?
> 
> i'm so spicy whew chile
> 
> anyways im glad y'all like this so much !! (im providing relief for the yuwin drought) i plan on posting every friday (and twice whenever i decide to include a yuta chapter / whenever i want to so yee yee), let's winwin y'all


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sicheng's best friend.

Jungwoo truly felt bad for Sicheng. Even though, yes, he was pulling Doyoung into his room hours later to get fucked so hard he forgot where he was, he thought a lot about him afterwards. Here he was, with a boyfriend - who was soon to be mate, he could sense it - and openly living his life ever since he presented. They had known each other since they were kids.

 

 

Sicheng had a lot of emotional baggage as to why he created his facade of WinWin.

 

 

Everyone their age grew up in a household that said omegas and alphas needed to be together, and that betas were a special case. This was all imprinted on the young even before they were old enough to present, just so that they knew what was expected of them.

 

 

It was harder for his best friend’s lineage. At the age of twelve, he was mature enough to understand what was going on in his house. He came from a considerably long line of alphas, all strong, and his family was biased. There were to be no omegas in the family, unless they were women. Same sex relationships existed, but were ostracized in his family, the same as if a female alpha and a male omega were together. You can imagine how hard it was when the doctor whispered to Sicheng that he was, unfortunately, an omega. The doctor’s voice was laced with guilt, at how horrible that was. But he knew how bad his family would treat him if they knew their son was an omega. He went on to tell them he was an alpha and protect him, medically.

 

 

That’s when he really began showing himself up, presenting differently. It was hard, because at the ripe age of sixteen he hit his first heat. His family dismissed him as weak and hormonal, and that he would toughen up. There were nights when Sicheng cried himself into the morning due to the pain of his heat. He’d rather suffer than to touch himself, knowing that he was in a place where he was not open to act on his omega needs.

 

 

Jungwoo did not want to be around him at those times. He was extra mean, and horribly ugly towards others. Suppressing all this sexual frustration in the faces of those who lived freely. But, he stuck through. Being the barrier between fights, and detentions, they built up a trust. And Sicheng told him.

 

 

After that conversation, they had never spoke on it again.

 

 

Even to this day, Sicheng’s parents frown upon it. They hate Jungwoo, and they call their son soft for being friends with a male omega that’s dating a male alpha. And he beats himself up about it.

 

 

Jungwoo thought, and hoped, that after he had left the house, and moved in with him, that things would be better and that he would want to live freely. But he was as cold as ever. He never saw the bright and smiley Sicheng from when they were children, or any sign that he still existed. A shell walked through their apartment, and around the streets, and hung out with them. 

 

 

Sicheng cracked, though, when Jungwoo tapped into his shell. Embarrassing as it is, Jungwoo beckoned him into his room one day and pulled out a box. “Those suppressants aren’t healthy for you, Chengie.”

 

 

He saw the fire in his eyes, and shoved the box in his hands before he could get angry.

 

 

A different atmosphere entered the room when he opened the box. The same one from when they were kids and he had told him that he was an omega.

 

 

Inside the box lie a vibrating dildo. Some might think this was obscene, and disgusting, and inappropriate to give to him in such a serious manner, but Sicheng knew it to be a gesture of goodwill. He was on strong heat suppressants, that made sure he never got heat, that he had been on since he moved out. His doctor was the only other person who knew he was an omega. This didn’t come without side effects, though.

 

 

It never went unnoticed whenever he stumbled around nauseous, didn’t want to eat, spent long days in his room, suffered mood swings, and more. Not to mention, crippling pain in his stomach at times that kept him on the couch while Jungwoo cared for him.

 

 

This was a sign that he cared for him and that he was really worrying for his best friend. His expression broke, and reformed, and then melted off of his face completely as he started shaking his head. “You’re so fucking annoying,” He sniffled. “Calling me by my name while you give me a sex toy.”

 

 

Jungwoo smiled and pulled him into a hug. “You’re welcome. I care about your wellbeing. You need something to ease your mind.” In more ways than one, but having something that broke him down as an omega and nothing but an omega would keep him grounded and prevent the bouts of suffering he went through. He was acknowledging who he was and reminding him that it was okay, for as long as he would believe it.

 

 

Sicheng cried on his shoulder for a while before pulling away with the soft, nostalgic face Jungwoo remembered from their childhood. 

 

 

“Let me know when you want to use it, and I’ll go out somewhere,” Jungwoo grinned at him. Sicheng was a certified virgin who had never had a hand laid on his own body.

 

 

“Okay, this conversation is over. You ruined it,” He shoved him and stood up, holding the box to his chest as if to hide it. Alpha WinWin was back.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i forGOT TO MENTION IT GETS RAUNCHY WHOOPS
> 
> well,, in this house and in this fic sex is no taboo and they're best friends so its FINE, its endearing.
> 
> (but honestly tell me how i made this the angsty and suggestive at the same time wtf)


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> disaster strikes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is a lengthy chapter,, its a doozy too so get ready. this is possibly one of my favourite parts ive written bc its so pivotal and detrimental to story development blah blah blah anyways
> 
> i almost forgot to post this,, i was so caught up with superhuman and rewatching awkward. (that show is so raunchy my young mind used to be so corrupted) enjoy the update!

A few weeks later, Sicheng let his heat hit him. It was in the midst of a holiday rush - lord knows what holiday matters to shoppers aside from Christmas - he was stressed out, and could use an excuse to call in sick. That’s exactly what he did, and he definitely acted the part when he physically called in while working himself up with a hand in his grey basketball shorts.

 

 

Since Jungwoo had given him The Gift, it had been about a year and a half, and the roommate had grown accustomed to hearing his deep whimpering through the wall.

 

 

What made him cry - in happiness - the first time he used it was the fact that it had a function that really stripped away his fake identity to make him truly feel like an omega. With the press of a couple buttons, the toy swelled into a mock alpha knot at the base. Jungwoo was really looking out for him, funnily as it sounds.

 

 

For the time being, since his roommate was gone, he went into the shower to have a better experience. His experience, though, was longer than he thought because soon after he turned off the water to continue this in his room, he heard the front door open.

 

 

Sicheng dashed, despite being filled and on the brink of another climax, into his room and shut the door. He pressed himself into the bed and let the toy - electronic, and without a doubt expensive, again, thank you Jungwoo - work him open and mix up his insides.

 

 

For a few moments, he was waiting for the knot, though synthetic, that he craved to send him over the edge. Where was it? He scrambled for the remote and realized he must have dropped it on his way back to his room. This was unfortunate.

 

 

“Jungwoo!” He shouted in between explicit cries of pleasure.

 

 

Jungwoo’s shadow shuffled under the crack of the door. “What?”

 

 

“Give it here, now,” Sicheng demanded.

 

 

The smile on his best friend’s face was so clear in his mind as his brain went fuzzy and he heard a faint, ‘Give what?’ As it vibrated more, it was quite clear that Jungwoo was holding the remote in his hand as he spoke and was fiddling with the buttons. “I told you I was going to come back in two hours, with company, I don’t know where you were-”

 

 

“I _swear to god_ ,” He flipped on his back to ease the vibrations as he watched the shadow disappear.

 

 

Listening closer, Jungwoo really did have company, of more than one person. This was unfortunate, because if he really messed with him, he was toast. Before he could form another coherent thought, he was jolted with more and more thrusts to accompany the vibrations. And, without skipping another second, a knot began to form. Sicheng was very sensitive, and all three kept on going for what felt like forever before it turned off completely. By then, he was writhing around the bed with his body shaking like no tomorrow trying to keep his volume under the noise of the get together in the living room - and he didn’t even get to finish.

 

 

The shadow reappeared at his door, snickering.

 

 

“I hope you enjoyed that, we’ve got lots of great company over.”

 

 

Sicheng wished that Jungwoo would stop trying to play matchmaker sometimes.

 

 

+++

 

 

As soon as he attempted to clean himself up and calm himself down to some extent, he changed into some clothes that he would wear out, and joined them all in the living room. “You should’ve woken me up, Jungwoo, if I realize you were having a party out here.” He said coldly, fully knowing that he would feel guilty for teaching him yet another ‘omega lesson’ at such a time. Long story short, Jungwoo was proud every time he made Sicheng feel like his true self.

 

 

“You’ve been grumpy lately. Let you sleep, huh?” He gave him a smirk.

 

 

Sicheng scanned the room and realized that most of these people were Jungwoo’s friends, and were his own acquaintances. Ten, Yuta, Kun, Johnny. Mostly people that worked with him, too. Ten hung out with him frequently, but they still barely knew anything about each other.

 

 

He stole a glance at everyone, and he could tell who was an alpha by the territorial way they glance back. Yuta and Johnny had a lingering gaze on him that he made them tear away with the movement of his eyes.

 

 

They were the matches that Jungwoo had intended for him. Johnny was far too territorial for him, and he could tell he would coddle him, which he hated, despite loving the attention he dreamed of getting as he curled up in his bed. Yuta was odd, and he felt dirty at the way he scanned his face. In an effort to avoid and ignore his gaze, he looked around, and his eye caught something else.

 

 

It was this stranger who had the remote in his hand.

 

 

Now, he knew that Jungwoo would never tell anyone that he was an omega, but he did have shady intentions. This was most definitely one of them. Yuta had probably been pressing the buttons carelessly this entire time, not knowing that he was unraveling an omega in the next room over.

 

 

“Is anyone hungry? I’m sure me and Jungwoo can make something,” He set an intense gaze - more intense than normal - on him. This was a real dirty lesson. It was a low blow, even for Jungwoo.

 

 

“I can order in, don’t stress yourself out,” He grinned. Honestly, anything to get away from this pool of hormones that was a disaster waiting to happen.

 

 

“I’ll do it,” He took in a thick breath and went back into his room.

 

 

Sicheng couldn’t just snatch the remote from this stranger. He was sure everyone knew he presented as an alpha, by his cold demeanor. At least that was the least of his worries. Now, it was the alphas attempting to make a move.

 

 

“Done,” He walked back out, nodding, but slightly frowning upon the sight of alcohol now being in play at this rendezvous. “No, I don’t want any, so don’t ask.”

 

 

The first and only time he had gotten drunk was when him and Jungwoo were alone, and he was having a dramatic mood swing that seemed to plummet right to rock bottom. He had a bottle of champagne in his hand and he was sobbing on the floor in front of the couch about how lonely, and sad, and horrible this life was, and he just wanted to be an omega, and be loved by an alpha - and that was not his mood swing talking. His pensive mood faded away the second alcohol hit his lips, but with that going down, up came all his emotional turmoil.

 

 

In a social situation, it would be self - purging his entire existence. Say goodbye to life as he knows it. Might as well move away and start a new life.

 

 

“You’re no fun, not even a little bit?”

 

 

Of course, he liked the way it tickled his tongue going down, so he grabbed a can. There was a knock on the door just as he made an attempt to join them, right in the place where he had gotten drunk. Jungwoo wanted him to settle in, so he got it for him.

 

 

“Doie!” Jungwoo grinned and opened the door to let him in fully.

 

 

“I came by to surprise you, but it looks like I’m getting the surprise,” Jealousy made the two alphas in the room shiver. Doyoung was an intimidating guy.

 

  
His roommate shook his head and pulled him inside. He did have a point, since Jungwoo was in heat. “These are all friends, and WinWin is here to supervise me, don’t worry.” Doyoung was also the jealous type, despite the fact that he had Jungwoo wrapped around his finger. That was a whole different backstory that he overheard Jungwoo and Doyoung screaming about across the apartment one night; He preferred to keep that in the dark recesses of his mind, next to vivid childhood memories.

 

 

Those two curled up in the recliner, letting everyone else banter back and forth.

 

 

“Where do you work?”

 

 

Sicheng was in the midst of sipping the same beer and gave the person who asked him the side eye. Yuta.

 

 

“Sorry, you looked excluded from the conversation.” He looked taken aback, and a bit intimidated.

 

 

“I presume you don’t hang out around me much,” He put his can down and stared at him blankly. “I’m having a nice time, and I very much so enjoy the company of my great friend and his boyfriend, whomst do not disturb my recreational drinking.”

 

 

Yuta gasped quietly and was taken aback. Jungwoo and Doyoung didn’t flinch, because this was quite a snarky comment, but was still typical Alpha WinWin. Everyone else stared at him, and he stared back.

 

 

“Okay, listen, he means well,” Jungwoo leaned up to sit on Doyoung’s lap. “He’s quiet, and shy, and he really didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”

 

 

“I did that time. Did you not hear the last part?” Sicheng looked over at him. And he knew why. As a response, he got a look that could read, ‘do not take this out on him, just because he was the one pushing the buttons do not ruin this party for everyone.’

 

 

Sicheng sighed and looked over at Yuta. “If I hurt your feelings, I apologize, but I don’t know you. I know your name, and that’s it, Yuta.”

 

 

Yuta dawned an unreadable and odd expression before shaking his head. “It’s my fault, you looked caught up in your head. Sorry for interrupting.”

 

He took in a deep breath at how casual he was, compared to everyone else he knew. It was like he was talking to a high schooler. With that, it was over, and they went back to laughing and talking and drinking while Sicheng sipped at his beer. Funny how the person who unknowingly gave him so much pleasure had pissed him off within seconds of conversing. Proved how fleeting emotions could be for him.

 

 

“You all are getting too drunk, I’m going into my room,” Sicheng stood up after a long while of eating, talking, and them drinking.

 

 

His omega self emerged as per usual when he entered his room, and he took refuge despite them all getting louder in the living room and occasionally whooping or shouting for whatever reason. He had curled up and already began resting off his buzz. Those three were annoying; Ten was tolerable, only because he was friends with him to a certain extent. But the rest - especially the current bane of his existence, Yuta - were currently making his head spin with anger at how loud they were being. Eventually though, the sounds of his TV drowned it out and he began to fall asleep.

 

 

While his mind was still begging to stay awake and yearned to see the end of the program, there was a knock on his door. Before he could snap out of his sleepy state, a light - that was most certainly not from his desk lamp - came pouring into his room.

 

 

Sicheng bolted out of his bed, panicked, cranky and angry. Nobody ever came into his room, even Jungwoo, whomst he trusted the most out of everyone on this planet. He pushed the person out into the hallway and against the wall, slamming his door behind him immediately.

 

 

“Of course it’s you,” He growled, pining Yuta against the wall by the elbows. Omegas knew a thing or two about weak spots. The other tensed in pain under him. “What do you want? Why are you trying to get into my room?” His voice was making Yuta swallow in fear of his wrath. “Fucking tell me!”

 

 

“Sicheng!” Jungwoo bolted down the hallway, the others cautiously peeking down.

 

 

“Don’t call me that! That’s not my fucking name!” The omega tightened his grip and pushed harder, so that he could feel the other’s joints grinding together, and it made Yuta groan in pain. He could be overpowered right now, but it was clear that Sicheng was having a meltdown and this needed to be handled correctly or someone would be getting injured. “Why were you in my fucking room, tell me or I’ll break your arms off and strangle you with your own hands! Tell me!”

 

 

Jungwoo finally noticed that Sicheng was not his normal self. His hair was fluffy, his face was puffed out from sleep, and he was wearing clothes that, oddly enough, he had never seen before. They were a pair of blue shorts and an almost matching soft blue t - shirt that hung off him loosely. It was Omega Sicheng.

 

 

Paying more attention, it was not murderous anger that seeped through him, but desperate fear. His mouth was almost in a snarl, but his face was soft and lax, and he was about to burst into tears of frustration, but his furious gaze made it seem like the tears didn’t exist.

 

 

“Guys, I need you to leave,” Jungwoo turned to the three that lingered behind him, basically pushing them out the door rather than giving them the time to.

 

 

Sicheng growled at Yuta, pressing him harder and harder into the wall until Jungwoo begged him to stop.

 

 

“He was trying to get into my room! _My room_! For no good fucking reason, that’s for sure! I’ll stay here and make sure the blood flow to his arms cuts off if I have to,” He snapped. All empty threats, but he was standing his ground.

 

 

“Shh, you’re being aggressive,” Jungwoo leaned forward and whispered in Sicheng’s ear, covering his mouth while speaking lowly, so Yuta couldn’t hear. “Please, Sicheng, it’s okay. He’s just an alpha, he’s not worth your time, go back to sleep and I’ll get him out of here.”

 

 

Sicheng’s grip began to falter, and his lip quivered while his face stiffened up and got angry. This stayed for a moment, before he shoved Yuta painfully onto his knees and shoved him backwards with his foot. It looked like a child beating up a full grown adult. “Apologize. Beg for my forgiveness.”

 

 

“I don’t think this is necessary, just let him go-”

 

 

“You both heard me. Do it, Yuta. Don’t make me break your jaw.” Sicheng started blinking faster to keep the tears away. “Alpha to alpha, do it. Man up.”

 

 

“Sicheng-”

 

 

“I told you to stop!” He snapped at Jungwoo. “I’m an alpha! My name is WinWin! A fucking omega will not push me around, and I will not let myself get pushed around by an alpha either!” His tears started spilling over. Yuta didn’t move, and Jungwoo was speechless at how he was freaking out right now. Sicheng went back into his room, slammed the door, and locked it.

 

 

‘As far as you know, he’s WinWin,’ Jungwoo said lowly through the door. ‘Like he said, his name is WinWin, and you know how tough he is. Everyone has hard times, so you better not bring this up to any living soul or use this against him.’ Yuta probably nodded as his large shadow of his body turned into two feet. The two shuffled away, and he began to sob.

 

 

Why? Because he was pathetic. Because he was hiding. Because he couldn’t take the reality of it all. Because suffering was the only option he had to protect himself. And he just embarrassed himself in front of everyone, especially that godforsaken idiot Yuta. Of course, nobody would know anything. Sicheng could have just been pissed, and he could have just been ticked off that Yuta wanted to interrupt his beauty sleep.

 

  
Some idiot had tried to get into his room, and Jungwoo let him, for some reason. Even if it was for a second, someone had seen into his secret abode and obstructed its specialness. He sniffled and wiped his cheeks while he rearranged the bookshelf Yuta probably saw when he opened the door. Had to keep it special.

 

 

Sicheng flopped down onto his bed, feeling sick to his stomach that he had acted that way as an omega. Though defending his ground, he felt like he needed to be put in his place for that. The only person who was willing to do that properly, though, was himself.

 

 

+++


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sicheng's heart is hurting.

The next day, he was back in his normal demeanor, cold and quiet, as if nothing had happened the previous night. That morning, he looked at himself in the mirror, upset that he had cracked like that. Yuta probably found him even more of a brute, which was for his own good. Jungwoo was the only one close to Sicheng for a reason.

 

 

“Cheng, we-”

 

 

He sat down at the counter and shot him a look. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

 

 

“We need to! I don’t understand why you did that, why you freaked out, why you threatened him like that, why you looked like that-”

 

 

At this point, it was a habit for him to interrupt Jungwoo. “I’m not talking about it right now. I’m pissed as it is. Especially because of that little stunt you pulled the other day. Where is it, by the way?”

 

 

A sad look graced his sleepy face, but he pointed over to where Yuta had been sitting last night. Why _Yuta_ , who was so improper, and careless, and so unattractive to him. Personality wise, that is. Something must be up, because Jungwoo rarely ever tried to get someone for him. Omegas were different, because they were nothing else but a hookup, but alphas meant that Jungwoo was planning on seeing him shed his skin and live his truth. He didn’t want to live his truth.

 

 

“I’ll be waiting for you, when you get home. In my room.” Jungwoo turned back to his food and sighed.

 

 

Jungwoo’s room was like his own room, but much more open. Everyone was allowed in there, and it was way less personal, but he felt comfortable in there, and might let himself slip away at times. He wasn’t looking forward to the conversation they would be having in there later on.

 

 

Sicheng grabbed his breakfast and lunch, in the same bag, and headed out the door.

 

 

+++

 

 

At work, they seemed to take an odd liking to him and how he was so cold towards them. Then again, he worked in an office full of slightly younger, and hormonal omegas, and few betas and alphas. They saw his coldness as the most attractive thing he had ever seen. Today, as he sat in his desk in his button up and jacket, he was getting angry at how many eyes stared at him.

 

 

He had lunch in the stairwell, and eased his features. Sicheng worked in a journalism position, basically editing the articles the betas had the ideas for, and the omegas wrote, until they were perfect.

 

 

His features were calm and pretty as he ate alone, knowing that he could relax now that nobody saw him. Lost in his thoughts, he snapped his eyes forward and saw someone peeking through a door at him. Again, having his personal air invaded. Just like the previous night, he got up angrily and stormed over to slam the door open.

 

 

“I’m so sorry, WinWin, I apologize,” The stranger bowed at him in condolences, clearly being afraid of being beat up.

 

 

“Are you trying to ruin my life? Why do I keep finding you trying to get me when I’m alone?” Sicheng snapped at Yuta. “What are you even doing here?”

 

 

Yuta struggled to answer the first few. “I - I need to be interviewed. I was picked up off the street, and they told me to go to the main offices.” He looked around, wondering if he was anywhere near them.

 

 

“You weren’t looking at anything but me. And if you did look,” There was a sign on the wall, “Then you would know that the offices were up these stairs.”

 

 

Sicheng was being horribly aggressive, so it was slowing the way Yuta was approaching his words and phrasing, even the way he was portraying his mood right now. It was easy to sense the shift in his mood go from anger to pity.

 

 

“If you are just another one of those alphas who thinks they can torture and walk over other alphas who look pretty, and dainty, and fragile, you have no right to even cross my line of vision.” Yes, he described himself like that. As hard and as angry as he seemed, he had softer features, something about his normal self he couldn’t cover up, no matter how hard he tried. “Upstairs.”

 

 

He could tell something was on the tip of his tongue, most likely an apology. Sicheng took a deep breath and with that, Yuta scurried upstairs.

 

 

+++

 

 

On the drive home, he couldn’t help but be scared of Yuta. As much as Sicheng hated him and was angry at the thought of him purely, he had seen things he wasn’t supposed to. He had seen him in states that only Jungwoo had seen, because he was alone or he was comfortable. Of course, his anger surely blanketed that all in Yuta’s mind, but he was still fearful that he would be outed as a weak, worthless, pathetic omega.

 

 

“Please stop terrorizing my friend,” Jungwoo offered as his greeting when he walked in. “Don’t think I didn’t hear about you threatening him again.”

 

 

Sicheng groaned and went to grab some pizza left over from last night. They rarely even got it, to be honest. “Tell me why he keeps catching me, Woo. Why he keeps catching me when I’m off guard and when I’m most vulnerable.” It sounded like he was hurt, but still with a growl in his voice. He didn’t feel secure spilling his guts out in their living room.

 

 

“It was an accident, both times I bet,” He shook his head. “And I take blame for the first one.”

 

 

The older slammed the refrigerator door and shook his head. “Tell me if this is an accident. I’m sitting on the stairwell at work, eating my lunch, and guess who I catch staring at me from behind a door. With no good reason, since he just ran away. Does that sound like a fucking accident to you?”

 

 

Jungwoo sighed. “He didn’t tell me that part. Listen, we’ll discuss this later.” He turned back to the TV and ran a hand through his hair.

 

 

Sicheng ate his dinner at the counter, until he made his way to Jungwoo’s room without even letting him know. His presence missing must have been noticeable since he joined him moments later.

 

 

“I know you like your space. I know you like your privacy. You don’t even let me see you most of the time. But you can’t blame someone for accidentally or intentionally being suspicious of you. You’re the biggest mystery in our friend group.” Jungwoo shook his head and sat at his desk. “I have never seen you that angry. In fact, I’ve never seen you this off guard and furious. I’ve never even see you- you- you in any state as an omega since we were kids. I know that I haven’t been as generous giving you the mental space you need concerning a mate, but I just know it’s getting to you. Me and Doyoung are months from becoming mates, and we’re around you. Let me know what’s going on, I’m worried for you, Sicheng.”

 

 

He sat back in the desk and bit his lip to hold back tears. Jungwoo knew how to read him like an open book, even though he was so tightly bound. “You know how I feel about this, Jungwoo,” Sicheng started to get choked up already and sniffled. “We’re going into my room. You can come into my room.”

 

 

It was shocking, but this was a big step. Jungwoo jumped up and rushed him into his room before he could change his mind.

 

 

While yes, it was very interesting to see his room for the first time, It was so different from the rest of the house, he looked over to see if Sicheng was going to do something drastic. This was a serious situation. Even in the midst of crisis, he was never allowed in here.

 

 

He was quite shocked, baffled - he didn’t know what he was feeling. Sicheng let his face fall into the demure and gentle expression that he felt comfortable wearing in his room, and started to cry. 

 

 

“It is, Woo. It’s getting to me,” He sobbed with his head down, letting himself be held by Jungwoo. “We’re getting older, and not old, but to the point where we need to find mates. Everyone is finding mates, and getting to be so happy.. I’m not sure if I will ever be happy. I’m an omega,” The older sobbed harder. Some would say that it was as simple as just letting go and being himself, but he wishes it was. His inner turmoil was just.. Far too deep. Being an omega was something he was ashamed of. “Nobody wants to know me, even as an alpha. I’m so mean, and I don’t even try to be.. I’m so suppressed, all my anger comes out when I’m acting like an alpha. I hate it so much, and I’m so lonely, so lonely..” The sadness in his words were enough to hold the heavy weight of his endless conflict. “I was s - so fine with you having the remote,” His words were faltering a bit at times when he got too choked up. “You don’t understand how it felt knowing that an alpha had it. One that doesn’t want me. I was an omega, a little _bitch_ , with that in his hands.”

 

 

“Sicheng, I’m so sorry,” Jungwoo tried to talk to him.

 

 

“I’m not done.” Sicheng finally looked up. The red in his face and despair made it puffier than normal, and his eyes were red and bleary. “An alpha has seen me in my most vulnerable. Crying, alone, content with myself, curled up in my bed, in the only place that I feel safe acting like how I was assigned at birth,” The crying had stopped, now forming a pathetic weakness that entrapped him and made him feel small in the worst way possible. “I don’t want anyone to see me like that. I don’t trust anyone.” It was rooted deep in his soul, this fear. “I can’t be an omega.”

 

 

“Stop talking,” His best friend pulled him forward to stop his hurtful, self - deprecating words. “I’m sorry. I had no idea you were going through anything this deep. How about we take the next few days off, and we treat your wounds,” He rubbed his back. “We’ll find some solutions, and some things will have to stay.”

 

 

Sicheng already knew what would stay.

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> almost forgot to posted again whoopsies
> 
> also these chapters are actually really long,, my mind is so powerful. ANYWAYS it's pride month turn up


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> treating sicheng's wounds (in a way).

There were rules set, after it took several hours of Sicheng trying to adjust to the thought of feeling free.

 

 

  1. Jungwoo was the only one allowed in his room, and Sicheng had to approve of it every time, even if it was for a second.
  2. There were no alphas intended for Sicheng to be dragged into the house.
  3. All ‘demoralizing’ activities would take place in Sicheng’s room.
  4. No secrets allowed.



 

 

Sicheng would be in his omega headspace until Friday, when Doyoung insisted that he see Jungwoo, which was three days away. All the blinds were shut tight on his request.

 

 

He was already in heat, so that was a guaranteed first activity to help him unwind.

 

 

“Just knock on the wall when you want me to start it,” Jungwoo hung out in the doorway of his room. “And if it’s too much. I’ll be pressing the buttons randomly, since I have no idea how it works.” Though, Sicheng’s eyes always drew towards a certain button, which he would save for last. “See you on the other side.”

 

 

Now, the omega was alone. The plan was that he was to let his heat rush over him, and to let Jungwoo control his favourite toy as a way to make him feel helpless, which is what he craved secretly. It was so clear in his eyes.

 

 

It took so little time, with him in his omega headspace, and he desperately banged on the wall. It took him mere minutes to tear his clothes off, and stuff himself as full as possible. A pillow was propped under his hips so he could feel it even more. The most pathetic omega moan came from him as it started moving.

 

 

The intent was that it wouldn’t be under his influence. He was laid out on his bed, being fucked with someone else’s influence - someone that he was comfortable with. Before he could get anymore sentimental, it sped up for a moment, slowed, and then started vibrating. Right about now he was regretting letting this happen without giving him any direction.

 

 

With the only instructions Jungwoo had being the volume of his moans, he begged and pleaded so much that he was beginning to sweat. Not one orgasm had come to him yet. Soon, though, just when he was about to cry out of frustration, he must have gotten the right rhythm of buttons down. It thrust into him gently, with the vibrations higher. Sicheng licked his lips in sweet satisfaction.

 

 

He craved to be held down and made love to, sweet and slow, to make him feel okay being his true self.

 

 

The thought was fleeting, because his moans were too quiet for Jungwoo’s liking. He choked out a cry as a knot began to form much sooner than he would have liked.

 

 

“Woo- Ah! Woo!” Sicheng hit the wall so hard his bookshelf jumped a little bit. The pain was assuaged with vibrations, which he invited lovingly. It was numbing, and slipped him further down the rabbit hole of acting like an omega. His normally deep and short moans arose to be whinier and drawn out. Even he himself had never heard such moans. At times, when he would wedge himself between his pillows, he would let out little growl - like sounds into the pillow under his head when it hit the perfect spot.

 

 

Jungwoo sped the movements of the toy up two speeds, and it made his stomach to all sorts of turns. Every few moments he would turn it down one, then up one, then down two, and up one, and tease him.

 

 

Sicheng loved to be worked up, which he discovered as of now. Tears were spilling out of his eyes in pleasure and happiness, and precum was trickling onto his stomach. “God, please, please,” He teased the head of his member with two fingers.

 

 

His cries were pitied - a bit too quick for his liking, since he was enjoying this feeling - and the knot swelled.

 

 

The feeling, as a internal one, not physical, was making him so happy. Of course it was bringing him closer to orgasm, but it was emotional. He started sobbing as he felt his body convulse and his legs shake. A big smile was on his face, completing the spectrum of all of his emotions. Sicheng created a mess of himself moments later, barely having the energy to slap the wall to let Jungwoo - whomst was temporarily forgotten - know he finished.

 

 

+++

 

 

Sicheng had curled up on the couch and fallen asleep waiting for food. After many minutes of silence from him, Jungwoo came into his room, as he warned before the entire thing.

 

 

_’Cheng, you’re really quiet,” He walked in and held his hand up. “Oh my god, clean yourself up. I would love to talk, but not like this. Get on some clothes, and I’ll make you food.” Though, it was nice to see him smiling and with joy in his eyes._

 

 

“Wake up, you baby,” Jungwoo nudged him through the comforter he was wrapped up in. “You barely get any pity from me, because I go through this, times ten,” He earned a whimper from Sicheng. “Sure, you don’t get this all the time, but still. Eat something. I didn’t make you food for nothing.”

 

 

The other omega sighed and sat up. “My legs hurt. They’re sore.” He took a bite of the wrap he had made for him. “Thank you.”

 

 

“Well, when you get the satisfaction you want, there’s consequences. You didn’t sound like you didn’t like it, though,” Jungwoo smirked. Him and Doyoung had a fair amount of nights where control was switched.

 

 

“Stop, I’m still in heat,” Sicheng sighed and stretched out. “Are you sure he won’t come over? It’s your heat, too, you’re just on suppressants. I don’t want anyone seeing me like this.” Doyoung, especially. One of the biggest alpha males he knew.

 

 

“He won’t, I told him it was an emergency. Besides, he can call me if he misses me that much.”

 

 

A pout remained on his face, and he continued to eat. His entire body was relaxed, and he found himself in a happy demeanor. It had been years since he was this happy, even in the light of the most beautiful situations. Not only was he experiencing happiness, but relief, and satisfaction. He would never be able to pay back Jungwoo for making him feel comfortable in his own skin.

 

 

“So.. I would like to know some stuff,” Jungwoo leaned back on the couch, pushing him over to make room.

 

 

“Go ahead,” Sicheng was still on cloud nine inside his head, so he was pretty much up to answer anything, especially for his best friend.

 

 

“Why do you have an entirely different wardrobe of clothes for when you’re in your room?”

 

 

He shook out his hair. “I’m more comfortable. I have to be fully into it, and when I change it makes me feel small and happy. My normal clothes to go out and are so dark and formal and just generally make me feel like I’m- an alpha. I- I - I don’t want it. Not when I’m just trying to be happy and alone.”

 

 

Jungwoo nodded and began thinking of another question. “You really haven’t changed? You’re not mean or cold; It’s just an act?”

 

 

“I have to be the toughest alpha.. It’s working, isn’t it? I’m scary, and it keeps people away. Of course, some people find me attractive. Like Ten, when we started to get a little older. But I’m too mean. But, I can be myself when I’m alone. Sweet, gentle, happy. Any other time, I’m an alpha.” Sicheng sighed. “You don’t understand how I would kill to be like this all of the time.”

 

 

“Y - Y-” There was something that he was trying to get out, and he already knew what it was.

 

 

The sleepy omega pushed off the blankets. “I have some bottles of strawberry champagne in my room, do you wanna get drunk?”

 

 

Jungwoo laughed and shook his head. “Maybe tomorrow, we still have to eat dinner. Plus, I wanted to play video games, like we used to. Hope you’re still good at Kinect,” He nudged him playfully.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> maybe some yuta soon.. Maybe


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bro time with sicheng and jungwoo.

Their teenage years were the best, at least when they were in Jungwoo’s adolescent bedroom. They would play games, and dance, and talk for hours on end. Times when the hidden omega was in heat - the very few times when he was, and they were able to hang out - they might share some kisses that satiated his needs temporarily.

While yes, Sicheng had never had a boyfriend, or a girlfriend, or anything of the sort, he had kissed someone before - Jungwoo. His first kiss was his best friend. It made him feel better in the times when the pressures of high school got to him.

 

 

It was a day when Sicheng was sobbing into his shoulder. A bunch of alphas were pressuring him to kiss a girl, one who was an alpha. Though not his type, she was still an alpha. He remembered her name - Joohyun. She was kind of just sitting there and waiting, while the rest pressured him.

 

 

He ran away when she looked at him with a sorry look. It was almost as if she knew he was an omega.

 

 

Even to this day, he thinks of her at times when an alpha’s gaze lingers on him for too long.

 

 

+++

 

 

Jungwoo pushed him up and laughed. “Go! Go! It’s your turn!”

 

 

Sicheng positioned himself within the perimeter of the Kinect and grinned. It had been quite a while since he danced in general, so Just Dance was not the best game.

 

 

He laughed joyfully, grinning and trying his best to dance along. His rhythm was perfect, and he hit the movements almost perfectly, as Jungwoo expected. When he was done, he jumped up and down out of habit. Happy habits that nobody had seen for years.

 

 

The omega flopped down onto the couch to catch his breath. “I won, again. I still got the hang of it.”

 

 

His best friend nodded and he went to turn on Minecraft. It was calming, apparently, which he did not know. Sicheng would spend most of the time in his room sleeping, or watching TV, relaxing activities. Maybe he would invest in a computer to take up more of his time, get some hobbies.

 

 

“Have you ever been attracted to any alphas?” Jungwoo sat back.

 

 

“Absolutely not.” The answer came a bit too quick. “I don’t think I have ever seen any that I found remotely attractive, because I pay no attention to how people look unless they are a friend.”

 

 

“Oh.. U - Uh..” That was not the answer he was expecting. Perhaps the whole situation he was in was deeper than he thought. It was more than just acting like a tough guy, it was like a whole new person was entering and exiting their apartment every day.

 

 

“I’m sorry, I just don’t take care of myself at all. I could not care less about my omega needs, because of how ashamed I am. I don’t want to feed the hope I have deep down,” Even though, that’s exactly what these few days were about.

 

 

Jungwoo leaned forward and pulled him into his arms. “That’s heavy, Sicheng. I’m here to carry your weight for you.”

 

 

Sicheng looked up at him from where he lay back in his arms. No romantic aura intended - because Doyoung existed, and would murder them either way - he let Jungwoo give his cheek a prolonged peck. Something like this hadn’t happened since high school. They both knew that, just like high school, it was out of comfort. Kissing was more than lustful, and meant more than a sexual interaction to him. Especially on his cheek, it made him feel happy.

 

 

“Thanks, Woo. I really appreciate it. I’m really unstable,” Sicheng let the soothing melody of the Minecraft soundtrack calm him down. His heart rate had rose quite a bit, since that was a topic that riled him up a lot. Clearly.

 

 

The air was thin, and Sicheng ended up falling asleep again; The soundtrack was just so peaceful. Perhaps he could add it to his playlist, for when he was having a hard day. Oddly enough, he never had dreams. There was nothing in the day, or in his life, that was worth dwelling upon while he slept. His mind was damaged to a point where he had no hopes and dreams.

 

 

+++

 

 

“Cheng, up,” He heard Jungwoo above him, coaxing him away from sleep. “I just made some pasta for dinner. It’s a comfort food that Doie recommended to me. Really good for omegas. Especially if you are in heat, or having a lot of hormones hit you.”

 

 

The older sat up and grinned. “You two are gross, get on my nerves. I appreciate him, though, taking care of you.” His best friend was the only person there for him, and he needed to stay happy.

 

 

Of course, though. Jungwoo did not want to brag about his long - term boyfriend. Not after he had just told him that it hurt him, and how lonely it had made him. That was torture.

 

 

Sicheng grinned, loving the taste of it. “Oh my god, this is delicious.” The taste was savory, and made his mouth water - in a way, it was getting to his hormones. “Oh my god,” He threw off the blanket and sprawled himself out as he ate. “I wish you could tell him thank you, I fucking love this,” A shiver shot through his body.

 

 

The way it simply slid down his throat and reached his stomach, settling there warmly as if it were curling up and sleeping. His senses had heightened up by thousands of decibels. This might be his favourite dish, ever.

 

 

“Oh no, oh no,” Jungwoo tried to yank the bowl away instantly.

 

 

“Hey!” Sicheng backed away on the couch.

 

 

The second he had turned red and saw him begin scarfing it down, he knew he had made a mistake, and made the wrong type of pasta.

 

 

Jungwoo grabbed his phone off the counter to call Doyoung.

 

 

_“What’s up, honey? Is something wrong?”_  After all, he had told him not to call unless it was an emergency, and vice versa.

 

 

“So, your special omega pasta,” He twiddled his thumbs. “What are the ingredients for the one that I like? The comfort one? I wanna make it but- uh- I feel as though I have forgotten an ingredient. I don’t want to make it wrong.” On the couch, the situation was worsening.

 

 

A sigh on the other end. _”You scared me for a second. The only difference between the one I feed you as an aphrodisiac and the one you like, is that you don’t add any of the extract that I bought for you, or any of the seasonings that I bought you.”_

 

 

“Oh no,” He groaned.

 

 

_ ”What? Who did you feed my  _ that _ pasta to?” _

 

 

After a moment of panic, he just figured he would use himself as an example.

 

 

“I ruined it for myself. Now I wasted pasta,” Jungwoo pouted. “I have to make a new batch now.”

 

 

_ ”I can come over, so that it won’t go to waste.” _

 

 

“Doie!”

 

 

_ ”I’m sorry, babe. I just miss you. If you ate any, just settle yourself in a cold bath and put on a cold mask. That’s what I do to you when you are in the mood, but you are too tired.” _

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there's a possibility that i won't update bc ya girl is falling behind on keeping fresh content in the vault, y'all know where to harass me to update though :)
> 
> i have nothing else to say except 127 need to rest, that is all


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ironically clueless yuta.

To be frank, Winwin scared the shit out of him. At first he seemed pretty relaxed, and laid back, with a few snarky remarks under his belt to complete the trifecta of a hot alpha. Now, after running into him twice, he was terrifying. There was that soft side that he saw for about two seconds before the aggressive one came out to play. It was a Jekyll and Hyde, in one alpha body. Yuta wasn’t one to be complicated, so he tried his best to avoid him. Tried.

 

 

That would be much harder now that he was going to be working in the same building as he was. After the interview that Winwin had so politely directed him to, they figured they liked how he rolled, and thought he would be a nice insight into what was cool and trendy, etcetera etcetera. Within the next few days he was hired. Hopefully not in the same wing or on the same floor as Winwin.

 

 

He didn’t have much to worry about, though, concerning what Jungwoo had hinted at. There was a drip in his voice when he talked about Winwin. It completely combated what he saw that time they had lunch. When he invited him along to hang out, he made him sound so interesting and lively.

 

 

Thank god he wasn’t that into alphas. Or into cheating.

 

 

Nobody really knew that he had been snuggling up to one of Jaehyun’s omega friends - not even Jaehyun. Taeyong was so sweet, and handsome, and thoughtful, and not to mention _so_  sexy. He put all the other omegas he had dated to shame. They had so much romantic chemistry, and he was about to tell everyone that they were unofficially official. It was a bit tiring, getting omegas thrown his way when he wasn’t interested.

 

 

Yuta announced it in the most Yuta way possible, by posting a photo of them together on Instagram.

 

 

Whilst the flood of likes and comments came in, he noticed that someone new popped into his suggested tab. _**Dong Sicheng** , @gsdsg_. It looked really familiar, and he remembered that was what Jungwoo called Winwin. He clicked on the profile and- oh boy, had he found something.

 

 

There were probably about twenty photos at the least, all horrible quality. Yuta clicked on the most recent one. It was from years ago. Winwin looked very different. Maybe it was the big smile on his face. _‘Freshman year is over! See you guys next year :)’_ , The caption read. That was the most recent and last picture. The account had a considerable amount of followers - if 1,000 could be thought of as anything more than generous - who seemed to be real people. Most of them were pretty much their age now, as expected, and their photos were recent.

 

 

Yuta went back to the photo and opened up the comments section. There were a lot asking where he was, or to answer their messages, all also from after the picture, but stopped as of a couple of years after the picture. He scrolled through more of the pictures. Some were of him and Jungwoo having fun, of him and some friends goofing off, him having fun, some family photos, things he liked and liked to do. In his tagged photos was the exact same things. Why had he abandoned this account? Jungwoo still followed it, and there was no trace of another one that existed.

 

 

Obviously, Winwin would probably rip his insides out if he ever knew that he had found his old Instagram account, under what presumably was an old name, so he wouldn’t tell anyone. He bookmarked some of the posts.. For later.

 

 

“Hey,” Taeyong had hopped out of the shower and walked back in. “What are you doing?”

 

 

“I’m just scrolling, nothing much at the moment,” Yuta closed the app and threw his phone down.

 

 

“Good. I wanted to ask before I left, if you would be so kind as to invite your friends over to my apartment for me? I’ll ask Jaehyun, but I want you to ask yours. They have to get used to me being around a little more, you know.” He started getting dressed, grinning at the fact that he knew Yuta was staring.

 

 

“Definitely. Last party was a bust, anyways,” The other made his way over and helped pull his clothes on for the sake of being close to him.

 

 

“Really? Why?”

 

 

“Jungwoo’s roommate is an asshole.” Yuta spat without remorse. “Tried to fight me because I went into his room.”

 

 

“Ohh,” Taeyong perked up. One flaw about him was that he liked to stir up drama quite a bit, and hear it. “Did you at least win?”

 

 

He huffed and sucked his teeth. “By default. Jungwoo had to beg him to stop, and then he just up and left. And get this, now we work in the same place. Almost tore my head off because I ran into him trying to find some offices or something.”

 

 

“Don’t let him grind your gears, Yu,” The older wrapped his arms around him. “If he’s an asshole, he’s not worth it. Don’t invite him. I don’t want any more trouble, especially not at my party, in my apartment.”

 

 

“I have no way of directly contacting him, thank god. I certainly won’t be asking him to come around you, ever. I wouldn’t want him getting any ideas, either, since you are quite the catch.” Winwin seemed the type to want to get a pliant, perfect omega for his own, which Taeyong was.

 

 

“Aw, are you scared? Do you really think he’ll just steal me away?” Taeyong nibbled on his bottom lip. “You’re much better, by far. It doesn’t matter that I haven’t met him, because hearing his name is enough- Yuta! I just took a shower.” He started grabbing at his ass.

 

 

“Fine,” Yuta pecked his lips. “I’ll see you later, then. In case I forget to ask, text me. Text me anyways when you get home.”

 

 

Taeyong left, and he chuckled to himself. One thing that he had and Winwin didn’t was a partner. At this age, they were so close to mating and settling down. Winwin wasn’t even _close_  to that. So, who was the real alpha here?

 

 

♡

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what did i tell y'all,, i promised a yuta chapter ! the plot chickens :) speaking of yuta,,, 190614 *chef's kiss*


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> winwin's lifestyle has consequences.

It took quite a fight to be able to fit his best friend into the tub, who was losing consciousness from when he was starting to slip away. He was soaking wet from forcing him into the cold path. For a bit, Sicheng was acting like a sleepy cat. There was extreme amounts of trouble getting him into the bath, he wouldn’t keep his body apart from Jungwoo’s, his eyes wouldn’t stay open long enough for him to do anything; As he recalled, it clouded up your mind with lust. In heat, he could only imagine, and that fact that someone who rarely ever went into heat had eaten it made him worried.

 

 

Monitoring him while he sat in the bath with a mask on was no problem. Most would find it awkward, but he completely disagreed. They were close enough for this kind of thing.

 

 

The same applied when Sicheng still had fallen into a deep sleep in the midst of bathing. Wonder if he did the same thing. Either way, he was carried into the living room - in case his best friend would get angry for bringing him into his room without permission - and wrapped up on the couch.

 

 

There were multiple missed calls from Doyoung, probably to check in on him. Sicheng was asleep, so he went for KakaoTalk messaging instead.

 

 

zeuswoo: it’s okay doie, nothing is wrong

 

 

kdoeng: i want to make sure, i’m worried. i don’t like being away from you for this long

 

 

zeuswoo: it’s nothing, i promise. i love you

 

 

kdoeng: okay. call me if you need anything

 

 

Jungwoo laid back and sighed, slightly disgruntled over how Sicheng was so unaware that sometimes, his secret affected more than just himself.

 

 

+++

 

 

Sicheng had woken up in the morning, and he stretched himself out. The cold air made him shiver when the towel fell off of his body. Damn, why didn’t Jungwoo put clothes on him, or at least cover him up sufficiently? He remembers absolutely losing his mind, because of the food Jungwoo fed him. His roommate was going crazy without his boyfriend, even for a day.

 

 

Said omega was most likely in his room. Last night, it had gotten a bit late. Sicheng covered himself with the towel and retreated to his room. His omega scent, the one that he only allowed for himself to smell, had become much more apparent. It was a good thing, maybe. As he changed his clothes, he contemplated staying in his room. Being alone was what he would do anyways, and he was still being an omega. While he brushed out his hair, he sighed. Jungwoo would get angry at him. Plus, he probably had stuff that he planned, to bring out his ‘inner omega’.

 

 

He sighed, making his way to the kitchen to start on breakfast. As a sign of goodwill between Sicheng and Doyoung, they made some food together once. It was Doyoung’s famous Kimchi bokkeumbap with eggs, just how Jungwoo liked it. Making it for him right now might be a good idea, because last night was an ordeal within itself.

 

 

The air in the kitchen was cool, and it felt great to walk around in comfortable clothes, and be able to feel comfortable doing something as simple as walking around the apartment. He hummed along as he made the rice, and mixed stuff in.

 

 

Just as he was letting the rice settle and was flipping the eggs, a wash of cold pleasure came over him. It didn’t feel like pleasure at the moment, though, so he ignored it.

 

 

Bad idea.

 

 

That cold was replaced by a warm that was threatening to burst out of him at the core, accompanied by a knot of pleasure that rested in his lower stomach. Sicheng moaned and kneeled down on the floor, because holy fuck. He basically threw the eggs off of the stove and sunk down against the counters, panting. Is this the reality of heat? It just hits you out of nowhere? The first wave was controlled, and he let it happen, but he didn’t think it would be this frequent or strong. Every time he let it hit him before, it was controlled.

 

 

Sicheng sighed and shamelessly shoved a hand into his pants. His mind was racking itself for a fantasy, any fantasy. Most importantly, one that included an alpha. He was far too dazed to get up and go to his room, therefore he had to imagine a knot.

 

 

That’s how Jungwoo found him, on the kitchen floor. “Sicheng, jesus christ!” The other omega groaned. Now there was slick, sweat, and a bit of cum on the floor, accompanied by his overwhelmingly strong scent.

 

 

Knowing how these things went, he knew that he was barely even hearing what he had to say. What could he do? Let him sit here and dirty the floor until he worked out the knot in his stomach? He sighed and pulled up his dead weight by his armpits, dragging him to the bathroom. If the two weren’t so close, this would definitely be turning him on, out of pure instinct. But knowing that this was his best friend helped him protect his morals. 

 

 

He was pushed into the shower, and while he was shedding his clothes, he rummaged around the back of his cabinet until he found some rubber toy and threw it in with him. “Have fun, come out when you’re done.”

 

 

Jungwoo shut the door and groaned. This was going to be so much harder than he thought. He tried to shake off any negativity he was feeling. As much as he got annoyed, he was the only person that Sicheng could trust, the only one that could take care of him in this situation. It was an internal conflict, especially at such a point in his life. Doyoung was warming up to the idea of becoming mates soon, but he couldn’t bear to live knowing that Sicheng had to take on life all on his own. By now, he would have expected his life to have taken a turn for the better.. But until then, he, too, was stuck.

 

 

+++


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a run in with a demon.

“Jungwoo..” Sicheng stumbled into his room with a towel wrapped around him, from the bath. His eyes were still glossed over from the previous wave of heat, and were red and swollen from irritation. “I don’t know if I can do this.”

 

 

It had been a good four hours since he had last saw him from the bath, and he looked like he had been through the mill. “Why not?” He was sat at his desk. Earlier, Doyoung had called for some conversation and cyber sex (thank god Sicheng was still in the bath), and now he was sat looking at his current stream of emails.

 

 

“I need an alpha,” Tears immediately rolled down his face. “It’s only getting worse, and it kind of hurts.” Sicheng leaned against the doorframe. “I’m going to take my medicine.”

 

 

“Sicheng, no, please. Are you sure?”

 

 

“Mhm.. It only felt really good the first time, I can’t handle the rest on my own,” Jungwoo was here, but.. Not in a way that could really help him. “I’m going to call the office and let them know I can work the days I had scheduled to take off, and clean up my room.” The sadness in his words was evident. “Thank you for trying..”

 

 

“Wait, we can still hang out, and play games, you just don’t have to be in heat,” He stood up. “You can go to work, but come home and be an omega with me-”

 

 

“No, Jungwoo. It was an effort to make this work, but it’s not going to. Doyoung probably really misses you. I have to work. Maybe if we weren’t adults, this would work. But we are, and we have responsibilities, and me having issues with my class is the last thing that should get in the way of everything.”

 

 

Jungwoo sighed and furrowed his eyebrows. His attempt to try and ease him into an omega lifestyle had failed, which meant he wouldn’t be getting a boyfriend - nonetheless a  _ mate _ \- anytime soon. “I’m sorry.”

 

 

“You tried, okay? Please don’t beat yourself up. It’s just too strong to handle as two omegas.” Sicheng looked down and made his way back to his room. It was clear that his best friend was setting him up to be an omega, because it was starting to weigh him down. That was the last thing that he wished upon him. Not only that, but it was a personal burden to know that you are the thing between one that you care for and their true happiness. He changed back into his typical pajamas that he wore around the house, pulled the sheets off of his bed, and shoved the godforsaken toy back into the drawer it typically resided in.

 

 

-

 

 

The next day at work felt a little hazy; Going outside after trying to endure heat - and still experiencing some symptoms - was difficult. He sat editing endless articles. At one point, he had to collaborate with someone from design to help him remaster the look of the articles, since he had no eye for anything but a good, long slumber at the moment.

 

 

Sicheng waited in his office for the alpha to come up. When he finally did, he almost entirely snapped back into his alpha disposition.

 

 

“Should I get someone else? I know you aren’t happy to see me,” Yuta swallowed and stayed outside of the door frame. “I’m sorry.”

 

 

“You work here now, of course you do.” He rubbed his face to try and cool his quickly boiling mood down. “Just come help me with this. Be useful for once.” Sicheng pushed his laptop to the front of the desk and groaned.

 

 

Yuta sat down in the chair parallel to him and immediately started dragging the sections of text around. “Maybe you should send this over to design, if you don’t feel up to it right now, because I feel like I’m doing more than you’ve done this entire day.”

 

 

“Don’t be awful.” His face was relaxed, but in a more tired way. With Yuta in the room, it had taken on a bit of a grimace. “I’ll email the head all of the scripts that I’ve edited so far, semi - organized, and you can take it from there.”

 

 

“Do me one better and transfer it through a drive. No struggle.”

 

 

The fact that he was looking like an idiot before Yuta had him seething, in a self - deprecating way. It felt indescribably bad to be below him right now. He stood up; A little too fast, on that note. When he reached up to grab a flash drive from his shelf, he stumbled backwards a little bit. He would have fallen if it wasn’t for- Yuta.

 

 

Yuta had grabbed him by the waist and held him up so that he wouldn’t go crashing back into his desk. One arm was wrapped around his waist, and then the other rested on his stomach. “Are you okay?”

 

 

Sicheng had to take a few moments to recover. It had sent an unwarranted and not welcomed wave of  _ alpha _ through his veins, and he was battling with class, yet again. It felt like Yuta’s touches were burning into him. All he craved was the touch of an alpha. Here you go, the universe was shouting into his ears. Just like the first few moments of a wave of heat, he felt like he was having a hot flash.

 

 

The stare of worry and what he feared was slight conviction snapped him out of his omega trance, enough to push his hands away and shake his head tiredly. Felt like he had gone through the wringer, and all Yuta did was touch his midsection. He snatched up a drive and threw it on the desk. “Here, take it.”

 

 

He cleared his throat and flopped back onto his chair. His mind was still in a bit of an omega mindset, and his body was trying to go back to normal, and that did nothing to help.  _ Yuta _ of all people had to be the one to make him feel something. He’d feel less guilty if it was Doyoung, even.

 

 

After several - minutes, he presumed - of spacing out, Yuta pushed his laptop forward. “Thanks. You’re looking a little sick, maybe you should head home. Or, at least go to the clinic down the street for a check in.”

 

 

“Thank you for helping, Yuta, now please leave my office,” Sicheng sighed, pulling his laptop forward to continue his work of typing up and lazily organizing articles.

 

 

No matter how outrageous the story, or interesting, even boring, or helpful, he couldn’t stop feeling the effects of simply being touched by an alpha. It was demanding, it was powerful, it was  _ addicting. _ To feel the control of an alpha was to slip under the influence and give in to any desire you wanted. He sat back in his chair and closed his eyes, breathing slowly. Just feeling it made him feel so warm, and the assertive nature made him feel more comfortable than ever. If he zoned into his imagination deep enough, he could feel his touch still there..

 

 

“Winwin!”

 

 

Sicheng jumped and sat up straight. His eyes were panicked and he swallowed.

 

 

“I better not have just caught you doing what I think you were,” Renjun shut the door behind him.

 

 

“No, sorry, I’m just a little drowsy,” Glad it was Renjun, and not anyone else. The young intern - turned - employee was quite friendly towards him.

 

 

“Hungover again?”

 

 

“Yeah.” Workplace friendships, or friendships in general, were not something that he thought about, but Renjun was quite nice. He would consider them friends. As one of the few betas in the office, they had a nice equal ground to stand on as acquaintances.

 

 

“A little birdie told me that you’ve got bad blood with the new alpha,” He shuffled around in the pile of trashed articles, raising his eyebrows and scoffing at some.

 

 

“He’s something.” Sicheng regained some composure and kept on editing.

 

 

“Alphas bumping heads, I’ve never seen that before. It’s going to be a fun little competition. I’ve only ever walked in on some of the higher up alphas bumping uglies,” Renjun stood up and stretched. “I just wanted to see what was going on, since he was scurrying out of here. You’re intimidating, and he’s a little scary. Good to know I’ve got you on my side.”

 

 

Sicheng rolled his eyes. “Always a pleasure,  _ Injun _ .”

 

 

“Hey, don’t get me started with that.”

 

 

“How’s that going, anyway?” He leaned forward and got comfortable, always ready to listen to Renjun’s gossip.

 

 

“Jen’s still pretty mad, even though I’ve told him that he has nothing to worry about.”

 

 

The older raised his eyebrows and bit back a shit - eating grin.

 

 

“We aren’t even dating yet! And Jaemin is really,  _ really _ , attractive. I’m just.. Testing the waters. What me and him do are nothing of his concern. I’ll settle it soon.”

 

 

“You said that last month, idiot.”

 

 

“I’m still young, don’t worry about me. Maybe I won’t end up with either of them, we’ll see.”

 

 

“Have fun with that,” Sicheng shut his laptop. “I’m going to take my lunch break, it’ll help me shake this.”

 

 

“I’ll tell everyone not to bother your personal time, you and your imaginary omega have fun in here.” Renjun giggled and ran out of the room before Sicheng could get his hands on him. At least he was being friendly, not toxic. He could take a joke; Needed too, after Yuta.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha did i not update last week.. whoops.
> 
> fr though i was busy for friday and saturday and updating on sunday would have through me off so im sorry sgrbgdkbjs i hope u enjoyed this juicy chapter !! (ps to those who are genuinely invested and like this story i love u)


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> instincts are exhausting, yet thrilling.

Long story short, his boss excused him early after he almost passed out while helping some of the omegas make copies of some covers - due to some wonderful alpha scent that had swept by and filled his  _ soul _ . What the fuck was wrong with him lately, wanting an alpha’s comfort?

 

 

He flopped down on the couch of the apartment and sighed. Jungwoo wasn’t home yet, so he couldn’t reprimand him for sleeping on the couch. It was one thing that would always be there for him when he didn’t want to let go completely. It didn’t take long for him to fall asleep, harder than usual. Sicheng figured that it was due to his heavily drowsy state. Sleep would help it wear off, indefinitely.

 

 

At the latter end of his prolonged nap, his alpha thoughts came back to haunt him. Desires, more like. A strong hold, pulling him forward to rest against their body, keeping him safe, letting him be himself while keeping a close, protective eye on him. It made him shift and relax in his sleep.

 

 

Those thoughts almost  _ instantly _ seeped into more pleasurable ones. A strong alpha hold on his measurable waist, pulling him forward, crawling up his back before sliding down to his hips. He had to imagine all of this, since he could only feel it in his midsection. Speaking of midsection, the hand on his stomach would discover the sensitive areas around his torso. Sicheng’s breath slightly picked up as the desires grew deeper.

 

 

The warm hand rolling its fingertips across his nipples for just a moment before swiftly reaching down to palm him. At this point, he was lying on his back, breathing faster than normal, palming himself. And that’s exactly how Jungwoo found him when he returned from work. This time, with Doyoung.

 

 

“Oh, for fuck’s sake, he has a room for a reason,” Jungwoo picked up a pillow that was knocked onto the floor and shoved it between his legs. Rather than being upset about him sleeping on the couch, it was more of having a wet dream on the couch after telling him he wasn’t going to submit to his class. “He’s content. Let’s just wait until he wakes up.” Doyoung picked his omega up, then they were off to go do whatever they pleased.

 

 

Sicheng turned onto his stomach and grinded on the pillow that Jungwoo had so graciously given him. He just wanted an alpha there for him, to love him, to care for him, to help him escape forever. That’s what he was really lost in.

 

 

And the fact that, in the back of his mind, he knew that it was Yuta’s meaningless, barbaric touch that had fueled said intense feelings, did nothing to help the guilt that followed up when he awoke later on.

 

 

Doyoung’s scent was present, and he felt embarrassed that he was seen by him, in a vulnerable state. Any said state was embarrassing to him. He looked at him as another alpha, who shouldn’t have to pathetically grind on a throw pillow to a figment of his imagination in order to get his rocks off. Those two were in the room - making out, he could tell by the giggling and shuffle of the bed - so he decided to get back to something he was useful for, which was providing them with food. All previous effects had worn off, so he was good to cook some barbecue style stir fry. Doyoung liked barbecue anything, as far as he was concerned. This would act as his plea for forgiveness for a) him having to witness that and b) have to be away from his omega for a bit.

 

 

Sicheng stood at the stove, chopping and mixing and tossing into the bowl, while doing his worst job at trying not to think about Yuta’s touch. For god’s sake, all he had done was to catch him and prevent him from falling and cracking his head open. He was grateful for that, and that only.

 

 

It was more difficult than he would like to admit to separate Yuta from Alpha. Alpha was strong, protective, sweet, everything that he could dream of and more; Yuta was.. Yuta. That alone was enough to place him on the other side of his mental venn diagram. In the middle was the fact he had to face - he had been influenced by an alpha, and that alpha was Yuta.

 

 

Doyoung was the first of the two to come out of the room, surprisingly. Maybe Jungwoo was asleep.

 

 

Maybe not, judging by the way Doyoung practically pulled him over the counter by the collar of his shirt.

 

 

“Listen,” The venom in his voice was already scaring him. “Just because you don’t have an omega to toy around with, it doesn’t give you a right to hoard mine.” His voice was quieter than normal. Jungwoo might not even know that his boyfriend was threatening him right now. Sicheng wasn’t one to challenge alphas - mainly because he couldn’t fight - so he would keep it to a minimum.

 

 

“I have no idea-”

 

 

“Don’t act like a dunce,” Doyoung growled. “You are the second closest person to him in the world, next to me, and I respect that. Bravo to you for making sure he’s okay. But do you know what else you are? An alpha. An alpha with influence, and the ability to steal. As pathetic as your lonely ritual from before pity party were, I take you as a threat. Keep my omega out of your intentions.” He pushed him back behind the island.

 

 

As soon as he saw him turn the hallway corner and heard the bathroom door shut, he sighed and shook his head. Great. Now he had an alpha after him. Not only that, but it was his best friend’s long - term boyfriend, and he thought that he was in love with him. All because he just needed another omega there for him.

 

 

“Fuck this,” Sicheng turned off the fire - whether or not it was done - and quickly grabbed a coat from his room so that he could leave. Fresh air ought to do  _ something  _ for him. The sunset was looking beautiful, and was casting a sheer brown film on the neighbourhood. The weather was getting nicer and cooler. There were no omegas or alphas on the street because of the time.

 

 

He eventually made his way to a park, and laid down in the cold blades of grass. It was the closest thing he would ever get to lying on a cloud and just.. Letting go. Maybe a bit too much.

 

 

“It’s a little late to be just laying around in public, don’t you think?”

 

 

It was another omega. This one had a powerful presence. One that Sicheng more than envied, even if he had spoken no more than fourteen words. “Never too late to relax.”

 

 

“I can help you relax..”

 

 

Sicheng furrowed his eyebrows and looked up.

 

 

“I promise I’m not a hooker, or a scammer, or a murderer. None of that. I just think you’re cute. Not to mention I can smell your slick.”

 

 

Omega to omega, of course he could, what with it being quite fresh, along with his more lustful scent. It seemed like nowadays omegas got off more with other omegas than with the typical alpha. Honestly? Sicheng had never done that. Considering the circumstances and the vulnerable state he was in, he was damn sure flipping that statement around.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dont you love it when your internet goes out the day that you need to update bc me too
> 
> heres that update, another one is coming on friday as per usual. thank you for all the wonderful comments and support that continues to roll in, i really like hearing everyone's take and such <3


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sicheng's first breaking point.

The stranger had told him - on the way to the backseat of his car - that he also knew he was an omega from afar because, ‘alphas don’t lay on the grass and think about their lives’. “They’re too egotistical to think about feelings or anything other than happiness. Nothing else exists to them.” Sicheng could tell that this was coming from more than just a general standpoint.

 

 

“What’s your boyfriend like?” He waited for him to unlock the car.

 

 

“He’s a big, scary alpha who can be a bit insensitive sometimes- He’s not my boyfriend, though,” At that, he swallowed. “I wonder why.”

 

 

As soon as it was unlocked, he was pushed into the backseat, the stranger was on his lap - it was happening quite quick already. “How’s yours?”

 

 

“I don’t have one,” Sicheng sat up to shut the door.

 

 

“That makes this less difficult for me.”

 

 

His lips were smaller in comparison to his, but in what he lacked, he made up for in skill. Sicheng’s heart skipped a few beats and he reached up to slip his fingers through his hair. The other was leading the way, nibbling on his lips, running his tongue across them. It was the typical omega on omega makeout that porn often tried to simulate, but failed. In a way, it was intimate. Hard to explain, but it was in this moment.

 

 

That, and the fact that Sicheng had never kissed anyone except for Jungwoo. So, this was kind of a big experience for him. The only reason it came off as non - chalant was because at this point in his life, it didn’t really matter.

 

 

The second their lips parted, he was panting and letting out smaller noises unintentionally. It was nice that he had a strawberry scent, in a way, that made him even hornier (god knows why). He bared his neck the instant that the stranger was working his mouth on it. If Jungwoo could see him now, he would kill him. He was sure that at least one mark would be left behind, so he was screwed.

 

 

Speaking of screwed; “Can I ride you?”

 

 

He choked on his breath for a moment, and the other sat up to look at him. His eyes were so big, and lustful.. Mesmerising, even. Not surprising, considering he was an omega. A beautiful one, he wasn’t afraid to admit.

 

 

“I know both of us aren’t exactly tops,  _ but _ …”

 

 

One would think that the decision of losing his virginity - in a way that he would have never thought, as a top - would take long, and hard, and eventually he would turn it down. For god’s sake, he didn’t even know his name!

 

 

Too bad Sicheng couldn’t give less of a fuck about sentiment.

 

 

“Fuck yeah.”

 

 

-

 

 

The other omega rolled his stuttering hips forward, still holding onto the safety handle in the back seat. Sicheng had one hand on his hip, and one on his own chest. As the movements slowed down, their heavy breathing became clearer than ever. They were both sweaty, because as much as he hated to admit it; That was hot. A fling with an attractive omega in the back of a car? Wouldn’t mind keeping that memory.

 

 

“Honestly? Not bad, considering that we’re both omegas. You’re better than a handful of alphas that I’ve been with,” He chuckled and rummaged around on the floor of the car before pulling out a blanket. “This will have to do, I guess.”

 

 

Sicheng was still rolling in the pleasure, so he just nodded. Eventually, he was wiped free of sweat and cum, and the other lifted himself off of his cock.

 

 

“Hey,” His attention was caught. “You might want to get dressed. I’ll even drive you home. A ride for a ride.”

 

 

He laughed and nodded. “Thanks. I really needed that.” Sicheng grabbed his clothes from where they were shoved, and pulled them on. “Maybe sometime, we’ll see each other at the park again. Hopefully under better circumstances, but these ones weren’t so bad.”

 

 

“Why not just leave your number with me? I don’t live very close to here. I just drove somewhere nobody would find me, or recognize me.”

 

 

“Well… Okay,” Feeling a little risky.

 

 

The other, beautiful omega wiped off his forehead before sighing. “Let’s get going.”

 

 

-

 

 

On the drive there, they mostly complained about alphas, and about society, and all of that. What a relief it was to talk to someone new, openly, about his own thoughts, with the truth completely out there. It was a plus that he was nice, and seemed experienced in life despite looking only a few years older.

 

 

“You can stop here,” Sicheng took in a deep breath. “Thanks for the ride and the consolation.”

 

 

“Likewise,” He leaned over and gave him another kiss. “I wouldn’t mind doing this again. We can be friends that help each other out. Friends with benefits sounds gross. That title is only applicable if we only plan on hanging out and messing around every time we see each other. Judging by your personality, I can tell this isn’t really your thing.”

 

 

_ You have absolutely no clue. _ “It’s not. I just needed to escape from life recently.”

 

 

“I’ll make sure to text you, or you can text me. I heard cyber sex is fun.”

 

 

Sicheng rolled his eyes and got out. “Goodbye.”

 

 

As he drove off, they still had never exchanged names. Perhaps this was a situation where names weren’t mandatory, or maybe they were so caught up, in the sex  _ and  _ in their feelings, that they didn’t bother to ask. He thought all about it on the way to the front door.

 

 

The latter two were sitting on the couch, watching TV when he walked in. “Winwin!” Jungwoo shot up and ran over to hug him. He was abruptly stopped at the assault of the omega hormones. The hickey on his neck helped, too. “Winwin..” Jungwoo looked at him with a look full of mixed emotions.

 

 

“See! I told you he just went to hook up. As an alpha, I know these things,” Doyoung sat up, smirking. As if he had won something, or was proven right. It was disgusting, primal alpha behavior.

 

 

“Sicheng, please come here,” Jungwoo’s voice dropped lower so that Doyoung could barely hear.

 

 

“Fuck off, I’m tired,” Sicheng stormed off to his room, with his best friend still following him. He shut the door behind him, only for Jungwoo for slip in.

 

 

“What the hell, Sicheng, please tell me you weren’t just gone for hours, losing your virginity to an omega,” The air was as thick as it could get, right now. “Please tell me that’s a bruise and not a hickey, tell me that it’s not sex I smell, or another omega’s sweat and slick and scent rubbed all over you-”

 

 

“Will you shut  _ up _ ?” The older of the two whipped around and scoffed. “You’re the last person that I want to talk about this.”

 

 

“I don’t think you understand how fucking worried I was, and how worried I am right now. You just  _ decided _ to go out and lose your virginity.”

 

 

“Quit saying that!” Each time he said that, the sleazier he felt. “That wasn’t that plan, so don’t make me seem like the bad guy, here.”

 

 

“What? And I am?” Jungwoo hunched forward and ran his fingers through his hair and over his face in frustration. “Listen, I’m sorry I can’t be here for you all the time-”

 

 

“Don’t you apologize for, first off, your own decisions, and secondly, living your life. You and Doyoung are a fucking  _ heartbeat _ away from becoming mates, not to mention the fact that I’m looking to avoid him right now. Why? I’m not going to tell you. This was a burden to me, and I feel like a burden to you, so I’m taking these weights off my shoulders. You should be proud of me, asshole, instead of making me feel like shit.”

 

 

“Sicheng” He let out a quick breath. “You’re not thinking straight right now.”

 

 

“I told you, I’m tired.” Sicheng narrowed his eyes. “It made me tired out, so please, leave.”

 

 

Jungwoo sighed. There was no making him budge, so he had to leave, as reluctant as it was, with all his questions left unanswered, with no sign of them being resolved any time soon.

 

 

-

 

 

“What’s wrong?” Doyoung had pulled Jungwoo into his lap the second they were in the other’s room together. He was kissing his neck and mapping out where he wanted to leave his mate mark with little red splotches, as a tease.

 

 

“I’m letting Winwin down,” Jungwoo dropped his hands in between them limply. “He doesn’t have a mate, and he’s alone, and I’m not there for him. He’s going through some tough things right now.”

 

 

“Don’t worry about him,” The jealousy kicked in a little. “He’s a tough guy, in some ways, so I’m sure he doesn’t need you. It’s no wonder he’s alone, but that’s not the matter on the table. You’re quite busy, anyways. Doesn’t he understand that?”

 

 

“Yes.” A helpless answer.

 

 

“It can’t be helped, Woo,” Doyoung rubbed his lower back. “He controls his own life, and it’s his decisions. I know he’s your best friend, and you care about him, and he cares about you, but maybe some space to give him the opportunity to figure things out is what he needs.”

 

 

Except that was the opposite of what he needed. He was making rash decisions, he was emotional, he was freaking out at the notion that he might be running out of time to start dating or start finding a mate, he was drinking, he was falling into a dangerous, melancholic pattern that could cause him to wither away from the world and become a husk of a man. Unfortunately, he couldn’t help but think that Doyoung had a good point. Maybe he was right. For once, he wasn’t pinning alpha status on his best friend, and was being logical.

 

 

“Okay,” Jungwoo laid on his shoulder. “I’ll try my best. Because I trust you.”

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay at this point honestly im gonna say that updates are to be expected between friday and sunday bc my life has gotten WAY more busy than it was before
> 
> FINALLY SOME SPICINESS TO THIS STORY im sorry it took so long dkghsigbvshb i just needed to establish everything,, i hope its getting even more enjoyable


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> controlled chaos.

It seemed as though that had become their dynamic, not knowing each other’s names. Sicheng would make his way over to the park when he was feeling upset. Sometimes, he would see him there, waiting, and sometimes, just by chance. Other times, he wouldn’t see him. Each one was fine, but some were even better. There was a fair amount of them banging in the back of the car, as well as various sexual acts that were brand new to him. At one point, the other realized that he was inexperienced in some areas (thankfully not that he was a virgin), and it became a fun learning experience. Him and the other omega spent a fair amount of hours in the past two weeks at that park just talking. Omegas were so easy to be friends with when you could be open about everything.

 

 

Well, not exactly everything. He still hadn’t told him that he was an omega posing as an alpha, or that dark past. His past was something he tended to avoid. Plus, he didn’t want this beautiful, wonderful friend to begin to take pity on him and ruin their genuine connection.

 

 

As for his relationship with Jungwoo, he wasn’t sure that one existed at the moment. After a few days of unsuccessful attempts at conversation, Jungwoo was left with the options of looking at him with pitiful expressions, and ask him about food, or laundry, or something basic. Doyoung seemed like he was beaming at this new separation. The threat of an alpha was gone. Though, it was taking a toll on Jungwoo’s happiness quite a bit. Did the alpha care? No, unfortunately. Not yet.

 

 

Currently, he was at work, texting his omega pal. They were going to meet at Sicheng’s apartment and hang out there. Nothing was set in stone, but they did want to meet somewhere that wasn’t the outdoors, or the back seat of a car.

 

 

“Let’s hope I’m not intruding,” Renjun said, before pushing his door open.

 

 

“Let that  _ go _ ,” He sighed and set down his phone.

 

 

“You look so cheery, way more than usual,” His coworker settled himself in a chair. “What’s up with you?’

 

 

“I have plans,” Sicheng continued to translate the script he was given. “With a friend.”

 

 

“Fun, fun- Can I ask your opinion really quick?”

 

 

“Hit me,” He pushed his laptop forward, away from him.

 

 

“So who do you think is better for me, based off of what I’ve told you? Jeno, or Jaemin?”

 

 

“Well, you’ve hardly told me anything, first of all,” Bode well for the other, who was an alpha. Ironic. “But I also don’t know their classes. Beta? Omega?  _ Alpha _ ? I don’t have a lot to work with here. But, basing off of the fact that you are betraying Jeno to hang out with Jaemin, I would suggest Jaemin. If you’re willing to take what you have with Jeno and put it at risk.”

 

 

Renjun groaned. Obviously, that was not the response he was wishing to hear. “Jeno will be upset if I leave him. Really upset. He’s expressive, and emotional.”

 

 

“He seems way too much for you. Too extra, as you once said to me about someone.”

 

 

“If you’re going to patronize me, I’m leaving,” Renjun stood up and sighed, moping towards the doorway. “Have fun with your friend, try not to scare him away.”

 

 

-

 

 

When Sicheng pulled up in the parking lot of the apartment, he saw the familiar car on the other end of the lot. He jogged towards it, and saw him in the front seat. They grinned the second they made eye contact.

 

 

Sicheng beckoned him to follow. “I was afraid that you would have lost your way.” Leaning against one another, they made their way through the hallways.

 

 

“I did. But then I saw you pull in, and I followed you,” He giggled. “This is a nice complex. Are you rich, or something? Should I start asking for payment in return for my services?”

 

 

“Oh, shut up,” Sicheng pushed him away, mostly to unlock the door once they arrived. Jungwoo didn’t seem like he was home. “I have a roommate. The friend I told you about. I guess I glazed over the fact that we live together.” He simply nodded and they walked inside.

 

 

To his great demise, Jungwoo and Doyoung were on the couch. The immediate look of pity smacked him in the face, even sadder this time around. Doyoung had risen his eyebrows and scoffed.

 

 

“ _ What _ ?”

 

 

“Oh, nothing.” He smirked and turned his attention back to what they were watching.

 

 

“Who is this?” Jungwoo deadpanned.

 

 

“This is my friend, you know, the one that you already don’t like?”

 

 

The other took in a deep breath. “It’s nice to meet you. I won’t be a bother.”

 

 

Sicheng didn’t give them a second to react or respond before pulling his fellow omega towards and into his room. They weren’t able to close the door without a shout of ‘don’t be too loud!’ from Doyoung.

 

 

“Asshole,” He groaned and laid down on his bed. The other joined him and laid across his body.

 

 

“Was that the boyfriend?” His face looked extra cute right now, discovering what his world actually looked like from the inside.

 

 

“Yup. I don’t particularly like him. He’s like yours, dumb, insensitive alpha.” Sicheng ran his fingers across his soft cheek. “I stay here a lot, in case you can’t tell. Ignore them, do my own thing, get what I need done.”

 

 

He leaned forward and kissed him. “Don’t remind me. Guess I have to avoid him, too.”

 

 

Before they were able to lean in again, he sat up. “Hold on, I have something to make this better.” Sicheng stood up from his bed, and walked over to his closet. Up at the top, in the back, which he was able to reach on his toes, were two bottles of his favourite strawberry champagne that he liked to get drunk off of. “I need to relax. This week was hectic.” He held out one of the bottles.

 

 

“Don’t get yourself too drunk,” The aura of pure recklessness indicated the type of fun they would be having today. Maybe next time it would be a simple hangout.

 

 

Sicheng leaned climbed onto the bed and began mouthing at his neck.

 

 

“You’ve gotten so much better at this,” His partner hummed and closed his eyes.

 

 

They had barely gotten started when they were interrupted. He’d hoped, that if at all, it would have been before they had begun, or nearly after. Maybe not at all would have been the most ideal.

 

 

“What?” He sat back on the bed.

 

 

It hurt to see Sicheng, bottle in hand, drinking, with a complete stranger. “I need to talk to you.”

 

 

“We’ve been over this-”

 

 

“It’s not serious, just come on.”

 

 

It was already infuriating that he came into his room without permission, and now he was trying to spark conversation, when they had hardly exchanged more than 3 words just today.

 

 

“Yuta’s having a party, and I presume you want to take your friend- I hope he’s just your friend.”

 

 

“I told you not to talk to me, especially if you’re going to sit here and ridicule me. We’re friends. Since you’re so concerned, we already talked about it, and we’re friends. We can’t see each other together, at all. It’s just good fun. And what makes you think that I would want to go to Yuta’s party? Yuta, the person that I hate the most.”

 

 

“See, that.” Jungwoo pointed a vindictive finger at him. “He’s actually sweet, and nice, and it’s all in your head! Everything is in your head!” He was whisper - shouting. “You’ve created this ugly, fabricated image of him because you don’t want to let your walls down. You owe him this, at least. Show some heart. I know you have it, so don’t bury yourself completely because it hurts-”

 

 

Sicheng swallowed when Jungwoo got choked up.

 

 

“It hurts me to not see  _ you _ anymore. Doyoung told me to keep my space from you, but I can’t stand it. You’re running yourself down and I don’t want you to.”

 

 

“Oh, god, of course,” He hadn’t told him about their little conversation. “Doyoung- I’m not talking about this right now. I’ll go, just let me fuck around a little bit, okay? I’ve never brought him over. I wanna let out some tension.”

 

 

“Fine,” Jungwoo groaned. “We’re talking soon. I hope you know that.” Now that they had actually talked, he didn’t want to erase this sudden progress.

 

 

“We’re not loud, promise,” Sicheng raised his eyebrows before slipping back into the room.

 

 

The other omega was laid on the bed. “Is he being demanding again?”

 

 

“Not exactly, actually,” He climbed on top of him. “I don’t need to worry about it right now.”

 

 

His statements were cut short by the other’s giggling. “I’m sorry, I drank a little bit while you were gone.” He pushed his hips up. “I know it was just super, super serious, but I really want you to fuck me. I’m really flexible.”

 

 

“As a bottom,” Sicheng chuckled and pulled his shirt off. “That can only tempt me, verbally, so much. I’m not a feral alpha. It’ll be much more fun if I act on it.” The bottle was held out to him, and he took a large swig. “I’ll try my best.”

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im finally writing ahead of time someone give me a cookie
> 
> it's about to get so spicy y'all don't even KNOW hehehe


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the full picture of sicheng's relationships.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hold on to y'alls wigs omfg

Sicheng leaned back on the couch and sighed deeply. Jungwoo had waited for him to get home from work just to drag him upstairs and force him to talk before he could lock himself away in his room. Considering that he was still full alpha from the day, he wasn’t in the best mood to talk about his feelings. “Can I at least  _ change my clothes _ ? I’ve been in them all day.”

 

 

“No, because then you’re going to sleep, I know it,” He crossed his arms. “Where do you stand? What’s going on with you? Because as far as I can tell, all you’re doing is feeding into this toxic alpha act.”

 

 

“Why would I ever even  _ entertain _ that? Why would I give in to the toxic alpha behavior that your boyfriend exhibits and encourages me to do?”

 

 

“I’m going to ignore what you just said,” Jungwoo wasn’t going to deal with this right now, because the divide between Sicheng and Doyoung had only grown stronger since Doyoung was a typical, type A alpha, and Sicheng clearly wasn’t anywhere close to that. “What’s going on between you two? Because I know sure as hell that it’s not alpha posturing.”

 

 

“Funny,” He groaned. “He thinks that I’m trying to steal you from him. As in, separate you two so I can have you to myself. In an alpha way. Apparently, I want you as my mate and he feels threatened.”

 

 

“Oh, my god, you’re kidding,” Jungwoo swallowed. “Look at this,” A tug of his shirt revealed a quite large and noticeable bite mark. “He’s been so possessive lately. I think it’s very endearing, and it’s enjoyable, but it’s a little scary. I know that it’s because we’re extremely close to being mates, and to be honest.. I’ve been holding back because of you.”

 

 

“Jungwoo! You fucking idiot, now you’ve dug us both into this hole,” Sicheng started to stand up and storm to his room.

 

 

“I’m worried about you, what do you expect?!” Jungwoo yanked him back down on the couch. “And you’re acting like I knew this would happen. When me and Doyoung mate, I’m 100% sure I won’t be seeing you for a while, and I want to make sure you’re in a good state before I just leave you.”

 

 

It was the most considerate, and loving thing that anyone could ever do for him, and possibly would ever do for him. He looked away and bit his lip. “I can’t ask it of you anymore, since I don’t even know what I’m doing. It’s gonna slip, one way or another.”

 

 

Jungwoo wasn’t sure how to respond, since neither of them knew where to start on a topic with such magnitude. “Tell me all about your friend.”

 

 

“Wow, straight to the point,” Sicheng pursed his lips.

 

 

“I have to get answers out of you, don’t I?”

 

 

“I met him in the park, that one day I left, and we did it in his car. He’s a pretty cool omega, and I like spending time with someone as a friend. Plus, he is fairly experienced in life, so the advice isn’t bad.”

 

 

“So he’s giving you advice on the fact that you’re an omega, and you need to be one, right?” Jungwoo perked up with hope in his eyes.

 

 

“Absolutely not, he knows nothing about that,” Sicheng rained on his parade. “To an extent, he knows everything. Only what my life would be like if I wasn’t acting like an alpha. He’s pure omega, and knows how to use it to his advantage. Really riveting discussions we have. We both have very similar views on society and how the alpha - beta - omega dynamics should work, and a lot of different ideas concerning relationships, but it’s entertaining.”

 

 

One would believe that this was great for him. A new friend, that he was being himself with. Jungwoo was thrilled that he had even made a friend at all; After all this time of hiding, he was opening up to someone that wasn’t him. But that was exactly it: It wasn’t him. All of these internalized feelings that he worked so hard, almost every day of his life that he had been his best friend, and he didn’t get a drop of what he was feeding to this virtual stranger. It hurt, and he wasn’t sure why. “So he’s your best friend now?”

 

 

“You could say that,” Sicheng said nonchalantly.

 

 

Jungwoo scoffed and stood up. “Did the rest of this conversation even mean anything to you?”

 

 

“I didn’t even know you felt that way, or where sacrificing a happy life until just now! Maybe part of my burden is you. I’m literally holding you back, you just admitted it! And Doyoung. Don’t get me started on that asshole. Having someone who isn’t biased in any way and that I can literally have no limits with is something I’m fine with. You’ve never seen me smile or go outside so much, or interact, so you shouldn’t be so critical of me making one of the first free reign decisions of my life. I might fuck up, it might be drastic, but what else do you expect, Jungwoo? I’ve been trapped inside my own closet for my entire life, pretty much.” He was the one to stand up next, this time passing him up to go to his room.

 

 

“Sicheng!” Jungwoo followed him. “You can’t just get angry at me like this, I’m listening to you, and I’m still trying to help! I need you to calm down and realize that the world might have it out for you in your eyes, but I’m apart of your world, not theirs.” The other omega was sitting on the bed and glaring at him. “Are you still coming to Yuta’s party?”

 

 

“Yes. I suppose. I need to go out, anyways. I’m not inviting him, though. The last thing I need is my guard to be down.”

 

 

“We fight too much these days. Please realize that I’m not the demon you think I am. I just wanna be here for you.”

 

 

-

 

 

The party was that weekend. He didn’t bother dressing up to any extent, only going through with the current style that he always wore around Yuta. The last thing he wanted to do was make him think he was dressing up for  _ him _ . Jungwoo, though, was a little more dressy than normal in his jeans and tighter t - shirt. Anything was dressy compared to his normally relaxed streetwear, though.

 

 

“Are you ready to go? Doyoung is waiting in the car.” Jungwoo knocked on his door. Him, Sicheng, and Doyoung were carpooling together.

 

 

Sicheng came out of his room and nodded. “Let’s go.”

 

 

“Oh, I feel like a proud mother. You’re going out to a party!” He beamed.

 

 

“Don’t push it.”

 

 

-

 

 

They arrived at Yuta’s considerably nice apartment building. There was only so much to trash talk about where someone lived, unless it was a horribly disgusting area and he didn’t take care of his apartment. The second Yuta greeted them at the door, he was extremely shocked to see him. In fact, he could smell the instant fear that came off of him. And coming from an alpha, that was interesting. Scary that an omega could stand up that much, to make an alpha feel fear towards them. Pretty sure that if Sicheng didn’t use scent blockers, Yuta would be able to smell the same thing.

 

 

“Thanks for coming, I wasn’t aware that Jungwoo would invite you,” Yuta nodded at him.

 

 

Considering that they hated each other’s guts? Or at least he hated his? Certainly. “Don’t look into it too much, he wanted me out of the house.” He pushed past him to follow Jungwoo. The fair handful of people he knew were here, such as Johnny, Ten, and Jaehyun. Everyone was scattered around different parts of his sizeable apartment, so he couldn’t see everyone. A large amount were probably Yuta’s friends that he didn’t recognize.

 

 

“Oh my gosh, is that Winwin?” Jaehyun gasped and walked over to where he was sitting in the kitchen, on the small island.

 

 

“Yeah, I got dragged here,” He was picking at the grapes that weren’t left out for the party, but were on the counter. “I presume Yuta actually invited you.”

 

 

“Yup,” His hair seemed a little darker than it was the last time he had seen him. “Apparently Yuta has a boyfriend, or something. I haven’t seen him yet, but I wonder what he looks like. He’s always gone after looks, you know.”

 

 

“I should have expected that,” Sicheng rolled his eyes. “Good, he’ll be occupied. He annoys me so much. But I suppose I can tolerate him if he’s so caught up with someone else.”

 

 

“You should quit posturing for a few minutes and realize he’s not that bad. I’ve never seen him purposely hurt a fly,” Jaehyun nudged him. “Come sit on the couch with Ten while the rest of us dance.”

 

 

A shock, since Ten was an avid dancer, and always has been, recreationally. Perhaps he was feeling a little tired, it was a hard week. Some holiday was coming up, as was a rush of business all around. The fact that he himself had given in to making a new friend was inconsolably crazy and impulsive. He took his seat next to him, and he seemed to have no interest in wanting to talk to him, more so, eyeing someone he couldn’t see from across the room -across? diagonal? adjacent? It was too hard to tell. Yuta had walked past a fair handful of times, yet Jungwoo was nowhere within his line of sight. Doyoung was, most likely, keeping him away. Sicheng groaned at the sheer thought of that situation.

 

 

More time had passed than he thought, because the sun was starting to fade away. He wanted to go home. After talking to Johnny for a few minutes out of boredom, eating nearly all of Yuta’s grapes, and getting hit on by one of Yuta’s beta friends, he was sick of being outside of the apartment.

 

 

Sicheng pushed his way through people until he found Doyoung. “Where’s Jungwoo? I wanna head back.”

 

 

“Do you really want to be the first one to leave?” He spat. “What do you have to go do? Grind on your pillow?”

 

 

Rarely did it happen, but he was already seething with anger. A, because he did that on a regular basis, and B, because it did nothing but demean his biological class. The angrier and stiffer his face got, the more smug Doyoung got. He wouldn’t hit him, and he was sure he knew that.

 

 

“Hey! Everyone, please quiet down a little bit if you care,” Yuta stood up on a foot rest to get everyone’s attention. For this, Doyoung was safe. He might have actually hit him otherwise, since he was feeling daring as of late.

 

 

It looked like he was alone, so what was this sudden announcement? The interruption annoyed him even more.

 

 

“I would like it if all of you stopped setting me up, since I have a  _ boyfriend _ now,” He grinned from ear to ear. There were various whoops and shouts of dumb, typical remarks about either him being lonely or his sex life. “C’mere, Yong,” Yuta made a motion beckoning someone forth. Guess his boyfriend, this  _ Yong _ , was in front of him, and he hadn’t made much notice. Sicheng scoffed and watched the man as he pushed his way through everyone to hug Yuta. How disgustingly cute.

 

 

The man, smiling and happy, turned around to face everyone with his arm tucked around Yuta’s torso.

 

 

And here he was; the face of his stranger. He was standing in front of him, smiling, proclaiming his relationship to the man he hated the most in this world. And now, he had a name to the face, a life, a story. Most importantly: A problem.

 

 

Sicheng stood there in shock. Only something like this would happen to him. It felt like he wanted to snap his own neck in half with his luck. The consequences of his sudden actions were running through his head. He had lost his virginity to him, been sleeping with him, venting all of his thoughts and dreams, trusting him as a best friend. Yuta’s boyfriend.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im not even gonna say anything just let that sink in


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> help, before i fall apart.

Sicheng was paralyzed, and he felt like he was going to pass out. He finally snapped out of his trance, realizing that there was a great chance he would be seen by him. To no help to his situation, he turned back to Doyoung.

 

 

What had he been hoping for when he looked over at him? Security? Sympathy? Pity. That’s what he got. Doyoung had the worst smile he had ever seen on his face. “Don’t you dare, shut up. I will hate you forever if you say anything.” He finally spat back at him. That made no difference, as the alpha stood up straight and chuckled to himself.

 

 

“What did I miss? I heard yelling,” Jungwoo jogged up to them. “I was in the bathroom, Doie probably told you.” Doyoung eyed him again and cackled. “What? What did I miss?”

 

 

“Check out Yuta’s boyfriend. He’s pretty hot, right?” He talked right into Sicheng’s face.

 

 

“Fuck off, Doyoung. I fucking hate you,” Sicheng shoved him.

 

 

“Hey! Stop it,” Jungwoo held them apart as to prevent anything.

 

 

The two of them had caused a small disruption. It began with a few people looking, then a handful, then a good chunk of the room. Part of that, being the host of the party himself.  _ No, no, no _ , Sicheng ripped his arm away from Jungwoo’s grip. “What’s going on?” Yuta peered over everyone, and everyone moved for him. Before the hidden omega could make his quick, unseen departure, they were seen. Jungwoo let out a small gasp and looked at Sicheng.

 

 

“Winwin, of course you would ruin things,” Yuta sighed and looked down. “Can you leave? I’ll walk you out.” His stranger attempted to follow him when he began to walk intimidatingly in his direction. “No, Taeyong, stay here and moderate the party. Make sure nothing else happens.”

 

 

Sicheng and  _ Taeyong _ made eye contact, shocked. They both were exchanging the explicit feeling of fear and regret in this moment. It was him to turn away and respond to those that had been talking to him. His own gaze was lingering when Yuta grabbed his arm roughly.

 

 

There it was, that scent. He had to contain himself from toppling over at the pure dominant alpha hormones that were overtaking him from the posturing. Following him along outside felt like being tugged on a rope, since the scent was making him feel as though he was floating.

 

 

“Listen,” Yuta pushed him, making him stumble onto the sidewalk. “Don’t come in here and ruin my party, then eyefuck my boyfriend.”

 

 

“I can’t look at the poor soul that’s been subjected to date you?” Sicheng huffed, full of pity.

 

 

“I’ve been quite tolerant and nice of you, so shut the fuck up and listen to me,” He started posturing, outside as the sun set and he had just been hit with the biggest revelation of his life. “I didn’t want to invite you in the first place. I invited everyone  _ but  _ you. There was just this gut feeling that I knew you would fuck things up,” Yuta narrowed his eyes at him. “I don’t know what your problem is, or why you’re some sort of asshole when it comes to me, or anyone, for that matter, but I would appreciate it if you stopped.”

 

 

He was unsure of how to respond. Insult him, and risk starting a fight? Apologize, and look like a softie? Walk away, and bury even more of his problems? All that was running through his head was Taeyong. That beautifully deceptive and insightful friend of his. Thinking of their times together with Yuta right here felt dirty.. But it gave him an idea.

 

 

Sicheng stood up straight and looked him straight in the eyes with that look. Apparently, all omegas had a resting look that could sway an alpha in an instant, and the same went for alphas, concerning intimidation. It was a means to make an attempt to get what you wanted.

 

 

_ “You look so cute!” _ He recalls Taeyong saying, when he had forced him to do it, and he didn’t doubt that whatsoever. 

 

 

Yuta was looking like him like he had ripped out his soul and was dangling it in front of his face. What was the result supposed to be? What was supposed to happen? He clearly wasn’t all too experienced in manipulating alphas as an omega. Each second longer that they held eye contact, the more Sicheng was losing it over his scent and pure alpha aura, and the more Yuta looked like he was going to melt into the pavement.

 

 

“Hey!” The sound of footsteps pounding through the loud, echoey hallways broke their eye contact. “I have to drive him home, we came together.” Jungwoo panted and looked at both of them. “Were you fighting? What’s going on?” To him, they looked like they were high out of their minds.

 

 

“Nothing,” Yuta shuffled his feet. “Go ahead,” He cleared his throat. “My bad for getting angry. I didn’t even ask what happened. You were sitting on the couch, and you were quiet the whole time. I’m sorry.”

 

 

Sicheng’s jaw mentally dropped. Yuta was  _ apologizing _ ? For  _ him _ causing a disturbance? He might have to use that look more often if it made  _ alphas _ submit. It was boggling his mind.

 

 

“He’s sorry too,” Jungwoo answered. “Your boyfriend is looking for you, you’d better go.”

 

 

There was a slight moment of silence, and another wave of tiny pitter - pattery feet made them turn their heads. It was Taeyong, sighing at his failed attempt to be covert. There was an inexplicable void of sound that made everything so loud to them, and made Sicheng’s ears tick in annoyance.

 

 

“Yuta, you should come inside and control everything, they’re asking what happened, and I can’t really answer anything,” Taeyong held onto his arm and looked down to avoid eye contact with Sicheng.

 

 

“Okay. I’ll see you around, Winwin,” Yuta made eye contact with him briefly before moving to wrap his arm around Taeyong’s waist.

 

 

Sicheng looked away and started walking to the car. Of course, he felt like the dumbest person on earth. He wanted to shrink away in his hidey hole of a room and drown himself in champagne until he withered away into a shell. Yuta was going to be hurt if he had ever found out. All the things that Taeyong had said about him where so horrible; He might not be experienced in relationships, but surely it was unhealthy to be thinking of your boyfriend like that. On top of that, he had to face Yuta whenever he walked through the office at work. Worst of all? He had opened his heart up, without indifference, because he thought he would be safe in the arms of a stranger. His only attempt to be himself had been foiled, by his own ignorance.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> teeheeheehee i snuck in some yuwin :) drastic changes coming soon via the omegas of the story ;)))


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> two ends of the spectrum.

Yuta was lying to himself if he said that he wasn’t constantly thinking about the way that Winwin looked at him. It sent his blood coursing through his veins and made his body go cold. The look was sweet, innocent, and soft.. And demanding, assertive, and tempting. Dare he say  _ enticing _ . He was having conflicts; Didn’t Winwin hate him? Wasn’t he supposed to be posturing? Weren’t they on opposite sides of the alpha spectrum?

 

 

He walked into the kitchen where Taeyong was eating some food. All of these thoughts were bubbling in his own head while he was taking a nap. “Hi, bubu,” Yuta pulled him close and took in his scent to distract himself from the horribly intimidating alpha.

 

 

“Hi, Yuta,” Taeyong sighed and continued to eat.

 

 

“Don’t you have to leave and meet up with Mark soon?” He was worried, since he had been idling and eating his food.

 

 

“Mhm,” The food slipped off of his fork. “Maybe I should just take it with me, since I’m lingering.”

 

 

“You’re always free to linger, trust me, Yong,” Yuta kissed his neck. “Aren’t you going out to eat? Why would you take it with you? Are you feeling okay?” He rubbed Taeyong’s slim midsection.

 

 

“I’m okay,” His boyfriend turned around and smoothed out his hair. “You can live without me lingering…”

 

 

“Go hang out with Mark, and cheer yourself up, okay?” Yuta patted him on the butt and kissed his cheek. Taeyong wandered back into the room where he was before, to get changed. As much as he wanted to be nice to Winwin, he had totally ruined his boyfriend’s mood since the party, which had only been a few hours earlier.

 

 

After cleaning up his unfinished food, he, of course, made his way to where Taeyong was, to cheer him up. He turned the small corner and saw him on the phone without his shirt on. “Who’s that?” Yuta whispered as he pulled him into a hug.

 

 

“I think you have the wrong number,” Taeyong looked at Yuta and hung up the phone. Before the screen faded back to black, it wasn’t a wrong number. There was a name, that went too quick for him to read it. Could he be going crazy worrying about him? Maybe.

 

 

“Hey, you,” Yuta kissed his shoulder. “I bet you’ll have fun with Mark and forget all about Jungwoo’s shitty roommate, okay? Don’t let him spoil your day, it’s never worth it with him.” He placed at kiss on his lips, then set him off to finish getting ready.

 

 

~

 

 

He was driving himself there. After the party, it was the only time he had so far to think alone. Taeyong felt horribly guilty knowing that he had cheated on Yuta. Sure, before today they weren’t ‘officially’ together, but it wasn’t the labels that counted. Why did he even let things go this far if he wasn’t feeling the relationship on his end. Yuta loved him so much, and made him feel secure, when he wasn’t feeling indirect towards him. On a real level? He was only happy around the times they had sex, as if it was a friends with benefits situation. There was no other option than to simply tell Yuta, to avoid breaking this wonderful person’s heart into pieces.

 

 

The other conflict was Sicheng. Or Winwin. That was fucking his situation and thinking up even more. Apparently his friend has everyone convinced that he’s a big, scary, asshole of an alpha that goes by a different name. Why was he hiding? He was such a delight to be around. What was with the name change? How long has he been faking it? The person that he thought he had known so well, was suddenly a different person.

 

 

As someone who cared for Sicheng, too, he was worried about what would happen to him when he told Yuta. Yuta was so aggressive, and angry, and strong - what was an omega to do about that? He surely wouldn’t go easy on him, since he thought him to be an alpha. Taeyong almost didn’t want to tell him. Almost.

 

 

This dinner was already planned, and the party had just been something shoved into his schedule. Yuta always told him not to do too much, so as not to tire himself out. That was haunting him right now. All throughout said dinner, Mark noticed that he was feeling off. Mark was the most trustworthy, honest, and reliable friend he could have. Could he tell him?

 

 

Taeyong sighed and looked down at his lap. “I cheated on Yuta.”

 

 

“What? I can’t hear you, dude, speak up.”

 

 

“I’m not saying it out loud, Mark.” He shook his head. His eyes raised, and he whispered even lower. “I cheated on Yuta.”

 

 

“Am I reading your lips right?” His best friend looked at him and sat up straight in shock. “What the hell, Taeyong, why would you do that?”

 

 

“I know I fucked up, Mark, and I will tell him, don’t pin me to the cross.”

 

 

“Oh, god forbid I get angry at you for cheating on probably the nicest friend that we have.” He set his fork down. “Do you know how much he loves you? I don’t even want to know how long this has been going on, because one time is enough.”

 

 

“Mark, I didn’t want our relationship to go this far in the first place-”

 

 

“So you’ve been leading him on? Absolutely not.” Mark got up, grabbing his phone and straightening his clothes. “You can pay the bill. Don’t bother texting me until you’ve fixed your fuck up with Yuta.”

 

 

Taeyong buried his face in his hands as Mark walked off. What else was he to expect from the most perfect, sweet, and goody two shoes best friend that he had for years? He felt like the biggest idiot in the world for thinking that he would have him by his side, or anyone for that matter. Was he supposed to go to Sicheng, the confused omega who was most likely angry at him? In this matter, he was all alone. In all fairness, he knows he deserves it for something that he knew would break the heart of a wonderful alpha. For once, he had to fix this all by himself.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wHAAT a T A EYONG POV ???
> 
> i really b makin literature moves huh . also i cried writing the next few scenes so either they really are sad or im sensitive . n e ways thank u all for the nice comments and feedback on here, curiouscat, and twitter! it makes me heart warm even if its just a 'nice' (yes, i've gotten comments on things saying just 'nice') and the comments yall leave make my heart burst <333


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> letting go so we can grow.

The drive home was long; In the front seat, he could feel Doyoung’s horribly sadistic smile the entire ride. He had to hold back from crying, because of how upsettingly angry he was at himself. Doyoung would actually step on him if he showed another sign of weakness. The second he arrived home, he had to shove him aside before he could assault him with insults.

 

 

Too late.

 

 

“What? Don’t you want to talk about it?” Doyoung grabbed his arm the moment he tried to storm off into his room. At this point, it was going to fall off after being constantly grabbed by alphas.

 

 

“I don’t give a fuck about your opinions, I don’t want to talk about it to you,” Sicheng pushed him; An immediate fight was started. He slammed his fists into every muscle junction he could think of that would hurt him out of pure instinct to cause him as much pain as possible. Doyoung groaned and flared his nostrils with each breath. His attempts to push him away were faulty every time. Sicheng had never gotten into a fight before, only harshly intense posturing, so this was new to him.

 

 

Jungwoo was clinging onto Doyoung and trying to pull him back. A swift punch to his stomach made Doyoung keel over. His omega gasped and looked up at Sicheng in shock, as if Sicheng had offended him by defending himself and attempting to end the fight.

 

 

“You weak little bitch,” Doyoung grabbed at his legs so that he was crashing to the ground.

 

 

“No! No! Doyoung, please!” Jungwoo clawed at his arms and pulled at his stomach desperately. His efforts were with good intentions, but didn’t prevail. Sicheng was pulled underneath him and manhandled to a moment of reluctant submission.

 

 

The alpha pulled his arm back, raring with power, and swung across to make contact with the side of his face.

 

 

Sicheng curled in on himself the best he could, and the tears he was holding back fell down. He was helpless, and broken. Letting his head fall back, he felt like he couldn’t breathe, and was losing vision of the dumb, misogynistic alpha on top of him. The dim light by the front door of their apartment blinded him, and he could barely take any breaths with the constriction he felt in his chest. Most of all, he was quietly choking out tears while the rest of his body went limp.

 

 

“Aw, are you crying? Crying because your little omega slut isn’t yours? And is  _ Yuta’s _ ? Jealous that he’s more of an alpha than you are?” He shook his shoulders.

 

 

Doyoung’s words were swimming in his head, and he laid on the ground. He’d never be an alpha. He would never have the respect that they had, or the happiness they were naturally allowed. Just a weak, stupid, nearly useless omega.

 

 

“Doyoung, get off of him,” Jungwoo urged. “Get off!” When he didn’t budge, his screaming made him move aside. “Sicheng, get up, please.”

 

 

“Is that some nickname or something?” Doyoung’s jealousy surged.

 

 

“Now isn’t the time,” His eyes teared up when Sicheng closed his.

 

 

“If you wanna be with him so much, why did you even invite to come along, huh? How long have you been in love with him?”

 

 

“Shut the fuck up!” Jungwoo shot up and pushed him. “I’m not in love with him! I never have been! Maybe if you ever  _ listened _ to me, or weren’t such an idiot, you would see what a good fucking friendship looks like. I don’t have to fuck him to be close to him. Stop being so insecure, you asshole! I’m trying my best to juggle you both-”

 

 

“Woo,” Doyoung tried to cuddle him when he started sobbing.

 

 

“Absolutely not,” He pushed him again. “Get out, I need to deal with him right now. Deal with the damage that you most likely caused with your ridiculous posturing and mindless bullying. This is my best friend, you know, and you’re just making it harder for him.”

 

 

Sicheng sat up and shook his head the second that he stopped having his breakdown (for now). “You two go cuddle or something, talk out your problems,” He sniffled. “Just ignore me. I’m fine.” As he left the room and closed his door, the sound of more crying and fighting caused by him plagued his mind. Call him drastic, but he needed to get away. Fully. Jungwoo deserved a better life than to be held down by someone he called his best friend.

 

 

-

 

 

“Sicheng,” Jungwoo shook him awake. “Your back is going to hurt.”

 

 

He opened his eyes, sighing. None of it was a dream. His entire life really was on a string, and he was spiraling into nothingness. The omega sat up in his seat and shook his head. He had sat himself at his desk looking for something, anything to help him move past his troubles. “Jungwoo, I hate that I’m holding you back. It’s eating me alive.”   


 

  
“Don’t even worry about that, please-”

 

 

“I want you to move in with Doyoung, like you said you wanted to.” Sicheng looked down.

 

 

“No, Sicheng,” He nervously laughed and shook his head. “He can wait, he has to, you’re in such a vulnerable place right now,” The desperation was clear in his voice.

 

 

“It doesn’t matter, I have to deal with everything right now. It bothers me so much, that you have to sit here and babysit me. You and Doyoung are only getting worse. The more you latch onto me, the more shit that just storms inside of him. He’s getting jealous easier, he’s getting more insecure; Don’t you see that I’m not good for you right now?” Sicheng stood up and rummaged around in a stack of papers in his bookcase. “I think you’ve tried to help me for as long as you can. Go live your life.” He retrieved a stack of papers with a binder clip and rested them on the desk.

 

 

“Do you know how scared I am to lose you, in a million different ways? I’ve been with you for way too long, and I’m super scared. I sent Doyoung home, because I think that he’s starting to get tired of you, I won’t lie.” Jungwoo rubbed his eyes. “I think you’re right..”

 

 

“That’s the lease for the apartment. We can take your name off as soon as tomorrow.” He looked at him. “I need to work this out myself.”

 

 

Jungwoo teared up and shook his head. “I’ll miss you so much.”

 

 

“Go and get your man. I’m going to head off to bed to sleep off my pain,” Sicheng chuckled and smiled painstakingly. “My body hurts so fucking bad.”

 

 

“Doyoung’s going on a dry spell for that,” His best friend walked out of the room smiling.

 

 

Previous nights, he had an immense amount of trouble going to bed because of all the thoughts and concerns swirling around constantly. Tonight was one of those nights that he felt weightless. Lying in his bed and closing his eyes felt like he had buried himself in a cloud and floated away. How would he work this out? That wasn’t for him to deal with now.

 

 

-

 

 

A few minutes later, he was fast asleep without a care in the world. Jungwoo hadn’t bothered to call or text Doyoung, because he was planning on just driving over there, no matter how late it was. Their relationship needed to be airlifted off the rocks, essentially. He made his way down the short hallway, pulling on his jacket, and stopping in front of Sicheng’s door.

 

 

Jungwoo pushed it open and peered into the room. If it was even possible to believe, his best friend looked even more disheveled than before in his own bed. His hair was extremely messy, his blankets were a mess from him getting comfortable, and his face was puffy from sleep - Sleep, and Doyoung’s jealousy.

 

 

He picked up the things he had set on the floor next to his room while he was getting ready, and quietly stepped inside. Good thing he was sleeping on his back, because it would be hard to maneuver this otherwise. First off, he took the thick ice pack he had and settled it between the pillow and his cheek before pushing his head to the side to lean on it. Luckily, he didn’t move a lot once he was asleep.

 

 

Next, he took the hot bag - a large insulated bag of water that could be heated up or frozen - pulled up the covers, and laid it on his stomach. Sure, he could use it however he wanted later, but for now it would be best there. Tucking Sicheng back in, he took in a deep breath and sat at the end of his bed, staring. In his most purest form was he when he slept, free from the bounds of the world that held him down.

 

 

How dearly did he wish that he would be okay.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i teared up every single time i went to write this . also, i noticed that some of y'all are feeling for ty ??? i didn't think my pity party would actually work lmao lol anyways the rollercoaster has begun ascending ;)


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yuta gets himself stuck in winwin's apartment.

It seemed more difficult for Jungwoo to part ways than it did for Sicheng. Sicheng knew he would always be there for him, and assure his safety and happiness despite the fact that they would be apart. Jungwoo was seeing this as parting ways forever, and he was clearly terrified of anything bad happening to him. Doyoung and him, though moving in together and having the potential to mate soon, were having a hard time for separate reasons. Doyoung was more than willing to help Jungwoo move out, which did nothing but make Jungwoo angrier at him. Sicheng hoped that soon, he could just tell Doyoung and stop the pointless, constant quarreling.

 

 

“We’re going to make another round,” Jungwoo stuck his head into Sicheng’s room. “Do you need anything on the way back?”

 

 

“I don’t. Just like I didn’t need anything last time you asked me, a couple of hours ago,” He rolled over. His body seemed to hurt worse than it did yesterday, so he was in bed. That didn’t bode well for Jungwoo, who was already concerned about him and was willing to stay and take care of him.

 

 

“You can change your mind, it’s only been a few hours,” Jungwoo pouted. “We’ll be back,” He shut the door.

 

 

Sicheng sighed and shifted the ice pack under his body. When Doyoung dragged him to the floor, it hurt his lower back. They were lucky that this party took place on a Friday, and that he had all weekend to recover the best he could.

 

 

His phone began buzzing, and he could feel the vibrations from where it lay and he did. It could wait; Perhaps it was just Jungwoo. Communicating with anyone wasn’t his main concern at the moment.

 

 

Later on, Sicheng was awoken by the front door, and whoever was knocking on it loud enough to reach his room. He really didn’t want to get up, but it was rare that anyone would knock on their door when they didn’t expect anyone. His body still hurt quite a bit, but it was optional that he was in bed. Begrudgingly, he got up and drug himself to the front door. There were so many boxes littered around, and so many of Jungwoo’s belongings along the walls. Seeing that made him a tiny bit emotional. Perhaps his decision wouldn’t hit him until he saw the reality of it.

 

 

He unlocked the door and opened it. The person standing there was the last one he expected, ever - Yuta looked like he had rushed here, almost. There were a million reasons why he could be here, but Sicheng was far too fatigued to list off even one.

 

 

“Jungwoo isn’t here,” He rubbed his eyes. “Can I help you?”

 

 

-

 

 

Yuta wasn’t an impulsive guy. He was the farthest from the type to not think things through or see another side of things, and didn’t even hit the threshold of that stereotype. All he was thinking about was Winwin, and Taeyong, and all that had been done wrong to him for no exact reason.  _ So,  _ when he swung his arm back and punched him through the doorway, the reparations of his actions were nonexistent.

 

 

That is, until Winwin collapsed to the floor and only one of them was standing.

 

 

“Oh shit, shit, shit,” Yuta whispered until his breath, leaning down to roll him over. There was already a sizeable bruise on his face, and now he would have another one. Lord knows how that had gotten there in the span of almost a day.

 

 

Most of his concerns right now were rooted in  _ what the hell he just did,  _ and what was he going to do about it. Winwin lived with Jungwoo, the one who always answered the door, and who would surely come back to either a disoriented and confused Winwin, or an unconscious one right in front of the door. The other alpha’s head was tilted forward. “Great, oh.. This is amazing,” Yuta lowered his head upon seeing what looked like a broken nose and a stream of blood from his nostrils, confirming damage.

 

 

What? Was he supposed to just barge into the apartment and try to fix his mess? Yuta did exactly that. He rushed inside, shutting the door before anyone outside could see him and get the wrong message. It wasn’t even fair that he had caught him off guard like this. Tired, injured; Who was the real asshole here?

 

 

Winwin’s body was lifted - Where would he put him? His eyes shifted towards the hallway, until the incident from the party came to mind again: The bedroom was off limits. The couch would have to do, even if it would hurt for him to get up later. Vaguely, he knew his way around this apartment. Yuta got up to rummage around the bathroom. There was peroxide, for the blood, and cotton for the bleeding, along with some gauze, and surely there was ice in the kitchen for his face. It was the best he could do.

 

 

The other alpha was still laid on the couch, unconscious. Yuta’s kind soul couldn’t help but bubble with guilt as he made an attempt to fix him up. When Taeyong had told him he was cheating, he was already upset. To have him come and tell him that after just making their relationship official was heartbreaking. How long had he been cheating? What was the reason - the  _ real  _ one? And at first, he believed it was just a stranger. Hearing that it was Winwin, of all people, made him see red. Winwin hated him for no reason, and seemed to threaten his existence at every turn. Now he was aiming to steal his boyfriend and cause him pain? He hadn’t allowed Taeyong another word before he was out the door and speeding to Winwin and Jungwoo’s apartment.

 

 

Now, he was contemplating. Was Winwin really that horrible? Would someone that looks so kind, deep down, be so malicious to do that to someone’s heart? Yuta finished securing his nose with gauze and medical tape stuffed inside the roll, then rested his swollen cheek against the ice pack. He looked so soft, and gentle. The way that his eyelashes rested over his soft, puffy cheeks - naturally, but now even more so because of his violence.

 

 

He sat on the floor next to the couch, sighing. It would be best to stay and explain what he’d done. Amidst his thinking and guarding of Winwin’s unconscious form, his phone buzzed in his pocket. The vibrations continued when he pulled it out, only to see it was Taeyong. He couldn’t shake the amount of fear he heard in his voice when he began storming out of the apartment, as if he was scared of what he was possibly going to do.

 

 

Yuta rested his head back on Winwin’s stomach and groaned. This would be a long talk when he woke up.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel eternally bad for constantly getting sicheng beat up omfg eiufgbirarfg BUT this time it's worth it okay i PROMISE
> 
> also poor yuta :((( poor baby deserves none of this :(( he needs someone to make him feel better ;((((


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> end to start.

Sicheng woke up, and his head was pounding, eternally, and he felt even worse than before. He squinted his eyes to try and stop any pointless tears from coming out, but that only made his head pound worse. A tiny choke left him and he sat up, and he determined that he needed to go to the hospital, with all this pain.

 

 

“Are you okay?”

 

 

He whipped his head to the side - regretting it, of course - and groaned. “You fucking idiot, if I wasn’t in pain, I would come over there and strangle you. What is your fucking problem?”

 

 

“Don’t be so quick to snap at me,” Yuta stood up and shook his head. “You deserve having your shit rocked after sleeping with Taeyong.”

 

 

“Oh god,” Sicheng rubbed his eyes and felt the poorly placed bandages on his face, with remnants of blood rubbing off on his hands. “I totally needed more injuries, and now something is actually broken..”

 

 

“What, did someone else beat your ass for it?”

 

 

“Shut the fuck up, Yuta,” He laid back down on the couch. “Doyoung hates me, and that’s all you need to know. By the way, I might not particularly like you, but that doesn’t mean I would tear apart your relationship. I didn’t even know he had a boyfriend, nonetheless that it was you. I would have told you on Monday at work, but he beat me to it.”

 

 

Yuta’s lips parted and he looked down, sighing. “I knew it wasn’t right, that something was just off-”

 

 

“Don’t apologize. Just leave. I have to wait for Jungwoo to come back, so that he can watch the apartment while I’m gone.” Sicheng glared at him. “I ought to make you pay for  _ this _ ,” He gestured to his nose, “But I don’t want anything from you.”

 

 

“Ouch,” The alpha sat on the couch at his feet. “Why do you hate me, anyways?”

 

 

“I told you to leave.”

 

 

“And? Why not solve this problem so that this doesn’t happen again?”

 

 

Sicheng had a serious look in his eyes. Why did he hate him? Because he was an alpha, one that was set up to break him out of his shell and threaten to out his facade. There was no exact reason that he could give him that wouldn’t involve mentioning that he was an omega. “Have you made the best first impression?”

 

 

“I didn’t even know you, I was trying to be friendly!”

 

 

“Yeah, okay. That’s nice of you, but you should tone it down. You never know when people want to simply be left alone.”

 

 

“You know, Winwin,” Yuta huffed and stared him in the eyes. “Maybe you should stop acting like this big bad alpha that scares everyone, and things would fair a little bit better for you. I was just trying to be nice, and I didn’t know that you didn’t want me in your room, or that you liked to sit and be quiet at parties, and you just went off. You’re compensating for something.”

 

 

The two of them sat there for a few moments, and Sicheng felt like his entire soul was being bared for him to see, and that Yuta could see it, too. It was uncomfortable to feel so intimidated by an alpha like this (ie, in a way that didn’t turn him on).

 

 

“Get out.”

 

 

Yuta rolled his eyes and stood up. “Now we’re even, Winwin.”

 

 

-

 

 

Jungwoo returned not long after, and was extremely appalled. It seemed as though he was going to storm out and do the exact thing to Yuta. They were going to the hospital, now that he had actually broken his nose. Since Sicheng could take the pain, for now, Doyoung suggested that they pack more stuff, just so that no time would be wasted. He’d obviously gotten some type of ridiculing, because he was reluctant to speak to him, and even more reluctant to hear his answers. Jungwoo could be intimidating when he wanted to be - all omegas could, clearly.

 

 

Sicheng waited on the couch, watching whatever was on TV that could distract him. Doyoung hadn’t bothered to even look at him, so he could assume that Jungwoo had screamed at him that he wasn’t in the best life situation at the moment, and that he needed to stop being an asshole for five seconds. Poor guy; He could see where he was coming from, because he just wanted to mate his boyfriend already.

 

 

There was another knock at the door, and he sighed. Who else could it be? This was just great. Everyone was knocking down his door to ruin his life, one by one. “I got it,” Sicheng’s body was starting to numb from the overwhelming pain, so he waved Doyoung away and opened the front door.

 

 

“Sicheng, oh my god, are you okay?”

 

 

Doyoung’s eyes widened and he backed into the hallway.

 

 

“No. I’m not okay. I think you should know that,” He spat back into Taeyong’s face. “You couldn’t have at least warned me that your big brute of a boyfriend was coming to knock me out?”

 

 

“I tried to call you, and you didn’t answer,” Taeyong wiped his eyes. “God, you have so many bruises, and your nose..”

 

 

“Doyoung fucked me up pretty good last night, too, so this was nice, too,” Sicheng scoffed. “I don’t have any reason to talk to you. You’re a cheater, and a liar, and an awful person. Don’t expect us to still be friends after you did this to him.”

 

 

“What, do you suddenly care about him?” He gave him a pity laugh. “Don’t forget that I know you. You’re suddenly going to care about Yuta, and give it to his little alpha hormones because you’re an omega that can’t get anyone? I can probably mate in the next year, but you can’t, because you’re hiding!”

 

 

“Taeyong, stop,” Sicheng pushed him outside, as his voice was getting louder. “Leave.”

 

 

“I don’t know why you think you’re an alpha, or how the hell you’ve got everyone convinced of it! Why you’re living this double life! You’ve lied to me, too, Sicheng, and if you think that I’ve created more problems for you, you’re wrong!”

 

 

“Stop it, you’re being awful,” Sicheng grimaced. “You might know more about me, but that doesn’t mean anything. This is for me to deal with, and it’s none of your concern. I trusted you, and you turned out to be worse than anyone I’ve ever met. I can’t believe that you’ve let me open up to you, when I’ve never opened up to anyone before, and the fact that you’re trying to turn this on me just assures me that it was a huge mistake. Leave, and never come back.”

 

 

Taeyong’s hands turned to fists at his sides. “What happens if I tell him, huh?”

 

 

“I’m not going to entertain your fucked up, sadistic hypotheticals, Taeyong.” He turned around and slammed the door. Inside, Jungwoo was waiting for him. Empathy filled his eyes when they looked at each other.

 

 

“I’m so sick and tired of it all,” Sicheng choked out a sob.

 

 

“Don’t cry, it’ll just hurt more,” Jungwoo walked forward and wrapped his arms around him. “How about we leave Doyoung here, and just go get you fixed up?”

 

 

“You’ve really whipped him into shape, huh?”

 

 

“If he wants to mate with me, he’s going to have to listen up, and deal with what I want,” Jungwoo grabbed his keys out of the dish.

 

 

“You’re such a power bottom,” Sicheng let himself lean into him, slinging an arm around his shoulders. “Good for you, he deserves to be put in his place sometimes, and you deserve the best.”

 

 

“Thanks, but watch what you’re saying about my boyfriend,” Jungwoo pouted.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i named this end to start.. u kno what that means..


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a spoonful of sugar.

Parting with Jungwoo was harder than he thought, and he certainly had enough time for it to really sink in, since he wasn’t coming back. As the two of them sat in the hospital room, they talked all of it out. It was ironic, how a hospital was the one place where they could be fully open; Nobody could possibly know Sicheng there, and the hospital had to know that he was an omega for medical reasons. The sad part, though, was that not many answers came out of their long talk.

 

 

“Hello,” A male nurse entered and smiled at them. “I’m just going to wrap your nose to secure it, as well as give you some medicine. You have a prescription, but I’m not the one to consult about that.”

 

 

Sicheng sat up straight as he went to the small tray he had brought with him. “Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot to mention that the medicine is a shot. I know you probably don’t feel your face right now, because you haven’t touched it, but it’s mandatory. The pain will kick in if I touch you.”

 

 

“A- That’s fine.” He shook his head and shrugged.

 

 

“Okay. Let me see your nose,” His head was tilted up with one hand, and the needle drew close. “Just focus on me, and you won’t feel any of the pain.”

 

 

And that’s what he did. This nurse was  _ definitely _ an alpha, and he had no problem looking into his eyes and searching for his scent. Call him crazy, but he was looking back into his eyes with an enticing look that made him want to give him it all right then and there. It was so attractive how he was holding his chubby face so gently, and his lips parted a bit just swimming in his eyes.

 

 

“Sicheng, so me and Doyoung are almost done moving my stuff,” Jungwoo interrupted.

 

 

“Hm- Ahh!” His eyes teared up as he cried out at the sudden surge of pain. He clenched his fists and hit the bed. “F- Fuck!”

 

 

The nurse huffed in annoyance. Clearly, it was his motive to distract him with his alpha charms. He rushed to finish the injection, despite his slow pace and Sicheng’s twitching and whining in pain, then prop up the splint and wrap his nose as softly and pain - free as possible.

 

 

“I’m going to get the doctor to write your prescription.”

 

 

As soon as he left, Sicheng laid back on the bed and glared at Jungwoo. “You couldn’t just let me have one thing?” His head was pounding, and it did hurt more than before. Thankfully, the medicine was already kicking it, albeit very slowly.

 

 

“I didn’t know it hurt  _ that _ bad!” He crossed his arms.

 

 

“Whatever,” Sicheng sniffled and wiped the tears off his cheeks and from his eyes.

 

 

“We are almost done, though,” Jungwoo reluctantly uncrossed his arms to lean against the seat of the chair on his palms. “What’s going to happen when I leave?”

 

 

He took in a deep breath. “I don’t know. I have a lot of stuff to work on.. I don’t even know where to start. I don’t really have a choice, because it’s now or never. What’s the point in even living if I go into old age alone, and still concealed from the world. Taeyong said to me that I can’t get anyone because I’m hiding. Anyone could probably get a mate within a year, but with me being so.. Secluded..”

 

 

“God, I still can’t believe how much of an asshole he is,” Jungwoo shook his head. “He’s awful, and that’s not it. I’m sure you could attract someone with your personality, and tell them later. There’s someone out there for everyone, and your- your- stigma- won’t do anything to hurt your chances.”

 

 

“Thanks,” Sicheng said with an unconvinced grimace. He couldn’t blame him though, for still being confused and unable to explain his situation. “I can’t believe you might have just blew a chance with an alpha for me.”

 

 

“He was shorter than you by a lot, I did you a favor.”

 

 

-

 

 

Sicheng was losing his mind, running around his apartment on Monday morning, forgetting that he had work and now trying to gather himself before he had to start heading out. He was currently having a dilemma trying to wash his face around the bandages. They were ugly, and didn’t do anything to compliment his face. Perhaps there was some foundation or something to make it look less.. Medical.

 

 

Upon opening the drawer, there was a bunch of various makeup scattered around. Jungwoo must have left it. While he was scrambling amongst everything, he pulled out a piece of paper that was stuck to something he accidentally tossed aside. ‘Look cute and get some alphas!’ It read, in Jungwoo’s writing. Sicheng had a small collection in his room, and did some to flatter his face sometimes.

 

 

He smiled and pulled out a bottle of BB cream, knocking his hand on a compact on the way out. It was a subtle pink blush. Sicheng bit his lip and lingered before snatching it up and setting on the counter, remembering that he didn’t have much time.

 

 

Eventually, he ended up leaving it and getting everything else ready. His frenzied mind carried him back to the bathroom with a few minutes to spare, to fix his frazzled hair. He grabbed his brush, and caught sight of the blush. It lingered in his peripherals as he fixed his appearance. Eventually, he ended up gently placing some on his cheeks, and a bit over the bridge of the nose bandages. It didn’t look too bad, and it made him look much less mean.

 

 

-

 

Sicheng aimed to avoid Yuta for a while. Sure, he said that they were even, and he seemed like he was apologetic and willing to make it up to him, he made sure that he never saw him, as much as it probably pained the other. He had more important things to attend to, and more important people, who weren’t trying to injure him.

 

 

Turns out the blush - on his bandages - was the first step to more comfort as a softer, more comfortable omega. Nobody noticed it, really, except for the nurse that changed his bandages next. Renjun, as well as a few other coworkers, just thought that he was extra exhausted. Blush turned into lip gloss, and then winged eye makeup, and then the tiniest of glitter accents. Never altogether, though, because that would be too noticeable - not to mention he still had a cast on his nose. Luckily for him, it would be coming off in a few days, as of him dabbing light amounts of glitter on his eyelids. It didn’t look too bad, but it was still quite out of place with his style of dress. Now that was a whole different thing he had yet to get comfortable with. Maybe once he was able to wear full makeup looks, securely, he would alter a bit of his style.

 

 

It wasn’t so bad, trying to change for the better.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i be like *sicheng soft omega noises*


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> reckless.

It was a joyous drive, going to the hospital to get his wraps off. He found himself overjoyed and gripping the steering wheel in excitement at the thought of being able to apply makeup directly to his nose, since it looked quite odd on top of the bandages. Thankfully, he didn’t have a final run in with the nurse that he had so elegantly been embarrassed in front of the first time, and probably never would again. Sicheng only noticed a tiny bruise from the stress of the wraps on the bridge of his nose. Oh, well. That could be covered up with makeup. That whole day was a rush, and he was just cherry picking the highlights of it.

 

 

He was much more peppy and less snarky at work, as a result of the makeup, which his coworkers were quick to notice. It seemed as though the second that he dismissed someone’s unconscious ignorance, everyone was stopping by his office to get something done. Sure, it added on to his workload, but it wasn’t anything that he couldn’t simply blow through. The office was running much smoother. Maybe it was just him, but the air felt lighter than normal.

 

 

One coworker, however, was not seen for a few weeks, at least not by his eyes. Yuta and him had not spoken or seen each other from the time that he had his cast on to now, and he didn’t think much of it at all. There was no real reason for him to stop by his office, since he was in a whole different department, and he was sure that they were avoiding each other. Although, on the passing Thursday, he saw him walk by a door while he was in the conference room. It was like seeing a ghost pass through the office. His gaze lingered for a few moments before he realigned his train of thought to what he was doing.

 

 

Sicheng was sat on the couch the next night, a bowl of food in hand, contemplating about exactly what kind of night he was going to have. While every night was spent inside, either playing PC games, sleeping earlier than normal, or getting ahead on work, he felt brave, with this new boost of confidence. There was a club maybe an hour away, and he was in the mood to go and have some fun.

 

 

He set down the bowl and hesitated to stand up before he reached a consensus. Almost nothing could go wrong, in the sense that he was safe, and all. Nobody would mess with him if he knew how to protect himself. Sicheng began tugging off his work clothes and made his way to his closet. He opened the other side, where all of his nice, colorful, untouched clothes were. They might not be ‘club apparel’, but they were unique enough to catch someone’s eye.

 

 

After shuffling through the rack and million times over, he wore a loose, dark blue button up that had a collar, and what one could call ‘high waisted’ jeans. Shoes weren’t a debate, since he would wear the same ones no matter what he presented as. Now, he found himself in front of the bathroom mirror, makeup drawer open as if he was looking at a chest full of riches. Sicheng excitedly applied a bit heavier amount of blush, some eyeliner - shaped shadow, tinted lip gloss, and some of his favourite crushed highlighter that would look so wonderful under the lights of the club. He left his hair messy and hanging in his face in strands. It just added to the look that he was going for.

 

 

And, damn, did he nail it. He stepped back and looked at himself in the mirror.  _ This _ was him. This was who he wanted to be. Sicheng laughed joyfully and turned away so that he could leave (after deciding to come back to the mirror and take pictures, of course. why not document such a glorious look and save the memory for later?).

 

 

-

 

 

The drive was slow enough to make him want to turn around and go back to sleep. The traffic going back, however, kept him on track to go. He arrived after the grueling hour long drive, anxious as ever to get inside. There were already a lot of people, and he could pick out a few that were eyeing him. It was empowering to be an omega, and to be desired by others. Once he had gotten to the front of the line, he showed his ID, and was given a wristband. ‘O201’, it read. Omega, and probably some jumble of numbers from the system. Sicheng stepped inside and proudly went over to the bar. So many eyes were on him, and it gave him an adrenaline rush. All these alphas thought he was worth their while. He ordered a drink to loosen up and sat down at the bar. A few alphas passed by and gave him looks, with few succeeding to entice him to the dance floor, solely because they hadn’t given strong enough cues. Sicheng wasn’t used to this, so a seductive side eye and a wink meant nothing to him.

 

 

An alpha that was already in the crowd caught his eye when he turned around to see who tapped on his shoulder. It had been someone else, but it was him who he saw. He was aiming to lock eyes with him. Sicheng might just be a little too self - confident, but it looked like there was an open space next to him, perfect for him to dance along. With a final chug of his drink, he was making his way over.

 

 

“Hi,” He smiled and immediately wrapped an arm around his waist. “I’m assuming that you swing my way, because you look way too handsome to be straight.”

 

 

“You’re right to assume that,” Sicheng blushed. “Thank you.”

 

 

“I’m Kun. Alpha, obviously. I saw your wristband.”

 

 

“Oh,” He bit his lip. “I’m Sicheng.”

 

 

“I knew I spotted another native,” Kun encouraged him to dance closer. “It would be hard to miss such a beautiful soul like you.”

 

 

“I can say the same. I’m sure that every alpha in this club has already made bedroom eyes in my direction.” He wrapped his arms around his neck, bravely. “You included, but yours were nice.”

 

 

“I’m gentle, of course. I just give that off, you know. Would you want me to be gentle?”

 

 

Sicheng’s heart raced at a million miles an hour. This was so exhilarating, and new, and he wanted to explore it all. He would give it all up for this alpha. “I’ll take it any way you give it to me.”

 

 

“Aw, you’re so sweet,” Kun confidently held his face and pressed their lips together.

 

 

To kiss an alpha.. What a feeling. He melted into it immediately, with the vigor and yearning of someone who had never tasted riches before. Sicheng really did feel like he was going to surrender his entire soul to him. Alphas were demanding, yet enticing, in the best way possible, and Kun was no exception to this. His scent was suddenly extremely apparent, and he relished in the arm sliding up his back to pull them as close as possible. He let out an aroused hum into his mouth.

 

 

“You’re so cute,” Kun ran his hand through Sicheng’s hair, almost in a petting manner. “Shall we dance some more?”

 

 

“Mhm,” Sicheng allowed himself to be turned around so that they were grinding. Who would have thought, that with free reign on his life, he would find himself tipsy in a club dancing with an alpha? He could get used to something like this, for the time being. Being an omega in the dark of night.

 

 

“Hey,” After a few euphoric minutes of grinding on Kun and relaxing in his arms, he spoke. “Do you want to come home with me?”

 

 

“I do,” Sicheng said without hesitation. He turned around and rested his hands on his chest. “It would be my pleasure.”

 

 

“Of course it would. You can count on it,” Kun grinned and pulled him in for another kiss.

 

 

The two of them kissed sensually. He would be lying if he said he didn’t jump at the chance to kiss him roughly before Kun slowed it down so that they could actually enjoy it. Sicheng couldn’t be more excited to go home with someone, and was jumping at the chance. Obscene thoughts sped through his mind whilst their tongues slid together and Kun nibbled at his lip.

 

 

“May I?” Kun nuzzled at his jaw.

 

 

Sicheng nodded and wrapped his arms around his neck. He felt like he was on cloud nine when Kun started taking in his scent, which was heavily present, as opposed to the suppressed state it normally was in. If Kun wanted his scent, he could have it, he could have anything he wanted. His instinctive inclination to scent kicked in, and he buried himself in Kun’s neck.

 

 

“Don’t get so caught up,” He pulled back and kissed his cheek. Kun’s eyes were the eighth wonder of the world. He took it in his own hands to pull him towards the bar so that they could have a drink to wrap up their night - at the club, that is.

 

 

“Winwin!”

 

 

He darted around in a panic to see who had called his name. Oh fuck. Fuck,  _ fuck _ . Someone caught him, and someone significant at that. The select few faces that called him by that name flashed through his head, and he couldn’t think of a single one that he was okay with seeing. His eyes caught on to the figure that was pushing through the crowd.

 

 

“Oh, hi,” Sicheng took in a deep breath and swallowed as Renjun appeared in front of them.

 

 

“We’ve got to leave,” Renjun looked over at Kun. “You take care of Yukhei, that’s your job tonight. I owe you, blah blah blah.”

 

 

“Oh- Um, okay, I guess,” He was rightfully confused. “Do you want my number, Sicheng? We can continue this another time.”

 

 

“I’ll give it to him, okay? Go find Yukhei,” Renjun insisted before dragging him away.

 

 

Sicheng was caught, and he knew that he was in trouble. On the way towards wherever Renjun was dragging him, he nearly burst into tears as his eyes caught on to yet another familiar face. The second that he turned his head in that direction, he found Jaehyun looking back at him from one of the tables along the wall. It had to be Jaehyun, the alpha that he secretly admired and looked up to. When he thought of an alpha, he thought of Jaehyun. Respectful, sweet, charming, yet demanding and assertive. Here he was, being exposed to him as a completely different person.

 

 

Not a second later, the person next to him also turned his head, and his heart nearly dropped to his stomach. Yuta. Yuta, who was aching to figure out who he really was and somehow knew that he wasn’t like this. This wouldn’t do any good for him trying to hide that from him. His eyes darted down to his wristband. Thank god the bold, black text was being covered by the hand dragging him away. It still did no good to make the feeling in his stomach go away.

 

 

“Why,” Renjun said, after marching them outside, past the bouncer. “Why did I just see you making out with one of my  _ alpha _ friends?”

 

 

“It’s nothing serious, it’s just some alphas having fun,” Sicheng took in a deep breath and leaned against the wall.

 

 

“Kun only goes after omegas,” He snatched his wrist up and looked at his wristband. “Which you apparently are one?”

 

 

“Listen, it’s not like that-”

 

 

“I know I’m not crazy, Winwin! Oh, by the way, is that even your name? Since Kun called you something entirely different,” He threw his hand back down by his side. “What the fuck are you doing, dressed like an omega, acting like an omega, claiming you’re an omega, making out with an alpha? You even smell like an omega!”

 

 

“Renjun,” Sicheng’s eyes teared up. “It’s disappointing, I know, but please don’t yell at me.”

 

 

“What are you talking about?” Renjun squinted his eyes at him.

 

 

He closed his eyes and shook his head. It was disappointing to others, that he was just an omega, and he already knew this. Renjun was disappointed that he wasn’t a fellow alpha, and instead was a weak and useless omega. He made a goddamn  _ fool _ of himself in there.

 

 

“You’re an omega?”

 

 

“Don’t tell anyone. I know it’s ridiculous, and I am just.. Awful.. But just don’t tell anyone.” Sicheng bit his lip and swallowed a sob.

 

 

“Wha..” Renjun was rightfully confused, almost stumped at this revelation. “You’re an omega?”

 

 

“I’m sorry, okay?” He finally cracked. “Stop saying that. I know I am, but nobody needs to know. Don’t act any different. This night never happened.”

 

 

“Winwin!” Before he could walk away, he grabbed his wrist. “Why are you apologizing?”

 

 

“Because I can tell you’re disappointed, that I’m not an alpha, and you’ve been giving me undeserved respect and attention this entire time! I’ve made a fucking idiot of myself, and I can’t change that.” His voice was quiet and strained at the attempt to not let his words fall through, and the tears had finally fallen.

 

 

“You..” Renjun shut his eyes and rubbed his temples. “I’m sorry, I’m just having a really hard time processing all of this. You’ve been hiding for all of this time?” Sicheng made another attempt to escape, but was stopped when he grabbed him by the shoulders. “Stop running away! I don’t understand..” He bit his lip and looked at him. “Do you really think that I’m disappointed that you’re an omega?”

 

 

“What else would you be? What am I good for? I’m just an ornament, I’m only good for fucking and repopulation. Why would you want to be friends with an omega? Why would you even want to be in contact with one as close as this? I’m not a strong, cool, intimidating alpha that everyone automatically respects. I’m not going anywhere in life.” He broke down.

 

 

“What the fuck are you saying..” Renjun whispered, staring at him with wide eyes. “Are you drunk?”

 

 

“I’m going home,” Sicheng tore himself away from the conversation and began walking towards his car. How would he even face him on Monday? Not to mention, Yuta, if he would even see him. And Jaehyun.. Oh… Jaehyun. He fully broke down and started sobbing, kneeling in the middle of the road.

 

 

“Get up.”

 

 

He whipped around when he felt himself being picked up. “What are you doing? Don’t pity me,” Sicheng snapped at Renjun.

 

 

“I’m not letting you get hit by a car.”

 

 

“Go party with Kun and Yukhei. Leave me alone.”

 

 

“They were my ride, so they can handle themselves. Kun isn’t dumb enough to get hammered in public. You’re my ride now.”

 

 

“Renjun, I’m not driving you home.”

 

 

“I know,” He pulled him up forcibly and crossed his arms. “You’re going home.”

 

 

“R - Renjun, I’m not exactly sure how to say this, but I’m not interested in you, so I wouldn’t be the best to hook-”

 

 

“Shut. Up.” Renjun stared at him coldly. “Get in the car and drive us to your apartment.”

 

 

Sicheng allowed himself to be tossed around by his alpha friend - was he still his friend? - and went to his car. He wearily went to open the driver’s side door, when said alpha came around the other side and stood in front of him. Renjun pulled him close and wrapped his arms around him, resting his chin on his shoulder. “It’s fine. I swear.”

 

 

He hesitated to bring his arms up to loosely wrap them around his smaller, shorter body. His breath was shaky, because Renjun wasn’t angry with him, or upset, or disgusted - most importantly, not disappointed - that he wasn’t an alpha, and he didn’t exactly know how to feel about it. All he knew was that he had been exposed to one, possibly three people, and hadn’t felt so much fear since he was a child.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i couldn't help myself for momentarily thirsting over kun okay . we love an understanding alpha friend ! renjun time babey
> 
> also now that events are starting to rise, the chapters will be longer than 1k ! excited noises


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hope.

Sicheng and Renjun sat in his apartment, idly trying to understand each other in silence for a good few minutes. Renjun looked really nice, like he had the same intentions as him - except, you know. In an alpha way. He was the first one to speak.

 

 

“Why do you want to be an alpha so bad?”

 

 

It was a question that would most likely solve every single one that Renjun would have tonight. Wisely chosen. “It’s obvious.” Sicheng laid back on the couch, against the arm. “Alphas are highest in society, and they’re so respected and cool. Alphas don’t need introduction. They’re powerful, and assertive. Everyone wants an alpha in their life. Alphas run the world. I’ve always been taught this, and it’s been drilled into my head. It hasn’t ever been proven wrong, either.”

 

 

Renjun sighed at his heavy answer. He laid down, too, so that they were both lying the same way on the couch. “How long have you been pretending to be an alpha?”

 

 

“My entire life.”

 

 

“God..” He had a pained expression on his face. “That’s awful.”

 

 

“I know.”

 

 

“If you ever think about it, all of that is true, but it is pretty hard being an alpha,” Renjun swallowed. “All of that is constantly on our backs. If something happens, that is taken away in an instant. We’re always relied on, so what happens when we need someone to rely on? It’s a lonely life, until you find someone you can mate with.”

 

 

“Trust me, I know. I’ve been through everything that you have.”

 

 

“It’s concerning how convincing you were. I thought I had gotten drugged when I saw you making out with Kun. Kun is such a sucker for omegas, and your face in that position messed me up so bad.”

 

 

“I would still like his number, you know,” Sicheng blushed.

 

 

“So.. He gets to know the truth? Do you just tell strangers?” He held a disappointed tone, ruining the lighthearted tone Sicheng had attempted to create.

 

 

“I can count how many people in this world know on one hand. So, no. Maybe Kun would have lured me in, and something would have started. I’m new to this whole ‘living’ thing. I’ve been isolating myself for so long, and to go out and be an omega without restrictions felt so good.”

 

 

“Listen.. I know this sounds ridiculous,” Renjun paused. “But why can’t you just tell everyone?”

 

 

“It’s not that simple. I can’t just go against everything that was instilled in me morally, even if I hate it, and disappoint everyone. Just  because you are fine with it doesn’t mean others will be. My  _ family _ especially. I’ll get disowned.”

 

 

“Maybe it’s for the best. You don’t even know who you are, and you’re well into your twenties.”

 

 

Sicheng sat up and looked at him. “At least you’re not afraid to be abrasive with me. Tell me what I need to hear, even if I don’t listen right away. My best friend is so gentle with me. Everything will come with a grain of salt, until the entire saltshaker spills out. He’s moved in with his mate, now, and they’re- He’s not his mate yet. They’re basically mates, already.”

 

 

“As cute as that is.. That’s torture. How haven’t you cracked yet?”

 

 

“Sadness weighs you down more than you will ever believe, Renjun,” Sicheng swallowed.

 

 

Renjun looked away in pity; That’s all he was getting from him, but it was coming from a good place. It was easier for Jungwoo to understand, since he was an omega himself, but he already had an entire support system under him. For Renjun, it was something that he couldn’t wrap his head around. “So.. Are you going to kill me now?”

 

 

“You’re fine, as long as you don’t tell anyone,” He grinned at him, but it was hardly convincing.

 

 

“I understand.. It’s your thing. I wouldn’t want to out you to anyone, and ruin it for you,” Renjun finally sat up and sighed. “Well.. What are we supposed to do now?”

 

 

“I suppose that since you know my deepest, darkest secret,” Sicheng put his legs down so that he could adjust his posture against the back of the couch. “I should tell you everything.”

 

 

-

 

 

Renjun was pretty shocked at the person he truly was, compared to that of what he had seen for however long he worked alongside him. It made sense, with the person that sat in front of him, though. “You are a marvel to the world.”

 

 

“Thanks,” Sicheng’s face was bright red from revealing everything, from his childhood to his shameful, momentary feelings for Yuta. “I can’t really take that as a full compliment, though.”

 

 

“When do I get to meet these alphas?” Renjun sat back on his heels.

 

 

“You’re not  _ meeting _ anyone. They’re just my friends,” He pouted. “I just look highly of Jaehyun, because he’s really.. Really… Alpha.”

 

 

“Clean up your drool, W- Sicheng.” It seemed easier for him to refer to him by his real name, especially since he only hung around fellow natives, but he still slipped up at times, and would probably continue to. “What about Yuta, huh? The one you were having a wet dream about? The one you think about constantly?”

 

 

“I desperately wish that it was someone else who had caught me that day,” Sicheng groaned. “I already told you, he’s onto me, and it scares me.”

 

 

“Just jump in!” Renjun shoved him and stood up for emphasis on his words. “Go for it! Life is so short, and it’s even worse now that you’re older. You literally have nothing to lose. Fuck your family, if they’re not going to accept you just because you’ve fucked up their lineage in their eyes. Have you ever been happy? No. And if your  _ friends _ don’t accept you, fuck them! Make more. You can always get a new life, if this one isn’t for you. Think about it. If you’re not even happy in this one, and telling everyone only makes it worse, is it really worth it?”

 

 

Sicheng had never been scared, or intimidated by Renjun before. He was the only alpha that he could say that about, really. With that in mind, he was anxious just listening to his tirade. Was it anxiousness? Or was it confidence, adrenaline, motivation, even? His mouth opened, and stuttered noises came out, but he couldn’t find the words to respond.

 

 

“I’m completely right. I cannot believe it took this long for someone to tell you this,” He shook his head. “You better take my words to heart, or I’ll kick your ass.”

 

 

“I will,” Sicheng nodded adamantly. “So.. What about Kun? Should I go for Kun?”

 

 

“Kun is very polite and all, but I assure you that he will sleep with you and break your heart. He needs someone aggressive, anyways,” He waved that off. “What about Yuta, then? You did say that you-”

 

 

“Don’t say it again. Maybe I do want Kun to just-”

 

 

“Okay, I get it. You do think about Yuta, though, and you think he’s a decent person. If he seems like the type of person that is willing to forgive, you at least have a shot at being his friend. You need more alpha friends.”

 

 

“Not at the moment, I don’t. I will  _ crumble  _ in the presence of an alpha.”

 

 

Renjun stood with his hands on his hips.

 

 

“You’re my friend! I just see you as a normal person. No particular class. Don’t be offended. It’s a compliment that I’m so comfortable with you.”

 

 

“Fine, you get a pass this time,” He huffed. “You’re deflecting, though. I know you’re scared, but this needs to be decided. Now. I will not let you go another day living the same way without changing.”

 

 

“I’ve been changing! I’ve been nicer, and putting more effort into looking dainty.”

 

 

“That’s a surprise, then, that Yuta hasn’t noticed sooner. All the other alphas have been giving you looks. Maybe Yuta has, I don’t know, but you’re really enticing. Even when you try your best to act like an alpha. It’s just something about the way you look.”

 

 

“I know, I know, I’m not the most intimidating looking alpha-”

 

 

“You’re not an alpha.”

 

 

“Shh, you know what I mean.” Sicheng sighed. “Do you really think that I should talk to him more?”

 

 

“Maybe it would be good for you to talk to alphas other than your few friends and that asshole that your best friend calls a boyfriend.”

 

 

“So.. Should I tell  _ him _ ?” His heart raced just at the thought of it. “It would really help Jungwoo, since Doyoung is really insecure. He told me, without hesitation, that he was holding off their mating because of me.”

 

 

“Absolutely,” Renjun sat down next to him and slung an arm around his shoulder. “Just.. When you’re comfortable.”

 

 

“It will never make me comfortable,” Sicheng mumbled pathetically. “Maybe Jungwoo can tell him.”

 

 

“That’s not an option. Nobody is going to believe that you’re an omega, especially not someone who has known you for a while and is convinced that much. You should go over and tell them in person. It will also help prepare you for when you eventually have to do that to other people. I know that my dumb words won’t help, but it’s do or die.”

 

 

Sicheng sighed, full of nerves and anxiousness and pure fear. “I need a drink.”

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> while most people consider renjun's 'ao3 personality' to be aggressive and mean, i believe that he is motivational and persevering, which is what sicheng DESPERATELY needed. so.. yuwin interactions? (also sorry guys, no alpha kun smut :/)


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> intern.

The next morning, he woke up with a hangover. Him and Renjun had gotten hammered, just for the fun of it. Who knows what had happened, but his surroundings showed him that it was, at least, a good time. His television was on, to god knows what, and his bottle of champagne was empty. On top of that, Renjun was laid over the end of his bed, and their makeup was smeared from both sleep and sweat. Though, the smeared lip tint said something else. Who knows what the hell that was about.

 

 

He struggled to carry himself to the bathroom to grab something for him, and Renjun whenever he woke up. It was odd how he had never done this with Jungwoo. Renjun was virtually a stranger to his world prior to this whole ordeal. There was a possibility that he was right, and he was only comfortable with strangers knowing.

 

 

Sicheng slumped himself back on the toilet and removed his makeup. It felt gross, and thick on his face despite him not wearing enough for it to have seeped into his pores. Wiping it off felt like removing a layer of skin that had been weighing him down. He sighed and got up to rub his face with some cold water. A shower later on would do him some good.

 

 

Since Renjun was asleep, he figured it was safe to change into some clothes that didn’t smell like pure alpha and alcohol. He lit some of his stress relief candles since the air was quick thick with said smells, and it would be nice to calm them down with.

 

 

It felt like he was floating about, especially sitting at his desk and checking his email, which he hadn’t checked it in quite a while. There were plenty that told him his paychecks had gone through, along with exclusive deals, and nagging notifications from dating apps. Nothing too out of the ordinary, at least. He switched over to his work email to see if he had received any requests over the weekend, and nearly blew out all the candles in the room with the sigh he let out. Apparently, he was being considered for a promotion to work in the same wing as the rest of the main crew, but with the requirement that he take on 5% of the omegas’ workload. That didn’t sound like much, but that was on top of his normal workload, and there were a lot of omegas in the office. Maybe food would take this off of his mind.

 

 

Sicheng sauntered into the kitchen, pulling out some of the ready - made meals he had bought. There was no point in cooking a lot for himself, so this was the easier alternative. He sat on the kitchen floor and stuffed his mouth full of lettuce and vegetables, as well as some meat. It didn’t take long for Renjun to wander out into the living room in search of him. “Good morning,” He popped up over the counter. “How are you feeling?”

 

 

“Dizzy,” He rested himself on the couch. “Did you at least make some for me?”

 

 

“You can shuffle through the fridge, it’s fine with me. I have some medicine, if you want. Do you want to shower before you leave?”

 

 

“I am not used to this hospitable attitude from you at all,” Renjun chuckled. “Yes to everything you just said. How are you so awake?”

 

 

“I get drunk all the time. I know how to take care of myself, and what works best. Not to mention, I’ve been awake for an hour or two, now.” Sicheng was about to pull the medicine he had grabbed for Renjun out of his pocket when he heard his phone ring. He ran back into his room and answered. “Hello?”

 

 

_ ‘Hi, Winwin.’ _

 

 

“Doyoung? What are you calling me for? Is there something wrong?”

 

 

_ ‘Mm..’  _ He hesitated.  _ ‘Jungwoo wants me to invite you over for dinner next week.’ _

 

 

“Oh,” Sicheng took in a deep breath. This was coming from the lips someone that he was not on good terms with, which made it tempting to reject his offer. On the other hand, it was a request via his best friend. He had to answer quickly before he had a chance to mess this up. “I can come. One of you can text me the details.”

 

 

_ ‘Try not to bring any guests.’ _

 

 

The line cut out, and he pushed his tongue across his teeth, nodding. Of course he would say something snarky, as that was the Doyoung he knew, after all. What else was he supposed to expect from him? He threw his phone back down and returned to Renjun. “Sorry, it was just Doyoung.”

 

 

“What did  _ he _ say?” Renjun accepted the medicine from him.

 

 

“He invited me to dinner, and I accepted. Not without insulting me, first,” Sicheng scoffed.

 

 

“That’s perfect!” He perked up. “You can tell him then.”

 

 

“This earl-” A dirty look from Renjun cut him off. “I guess... Let’s hope I don’t collapse or get beat up.”

  
  


 

-

 

 

Getting up to go to work the upcoming Monday was agonizing, knowing that he had even more on his plate to stress about. He had already come to an agreement with Renjun that he would try his best to be himself, even if it would kill him. In the end, it would all be worth it, he kept repeating to himself.

 

 

He went up a floor to the boss’ office, where he received the outline of his workload for the week. It was a lot, just as he predicted. Sicheng was reluctant, but took the folder with him to begin working towards his promotion. Before he could leave, she stopped him.

 

 

“You know, you’re awfully resilient and hard working for an omega. I know you like identify as an alpha, and all, but I’m just saying,” She propped her elbows up on the desk. “You were working with the omegas, then independently as an editor, and now you’re about to be the only omega ever to be promoted to work with the alphas. I’m impressed. Wouldn’t be surprised if you took my place one day.”

 

 

Sicheng pressed his lips together into a grin and bowed to her briefly. “Thank you. I’m going to get started on this work, now.” He dismissed himself, to her understanding, and went back down to his office. Soon enough, he would have his own office in the same wing as the alphas.

 

 

The work had already proved to be a lot, but it was also testing his abilities. His previous job was to edit the pieces that he received and reorganize the layout of the articles themselves. She must have seen something in his editing that said he was worthy of actually finalizing articles. If he got this promotion, he would be the final person the articles and pictures would go through, which also meant he decided the final layout of the entire magazine and helped decide what the cover would look like. It was a big status change to be working with the alphas.

 

 

Taking on the omegas’ workload meant that he, too, had to actually go back to writing articles, then editing them, and sending them to the alphas to be finalized. This, on top of his normal work, and with whatever his coworkers passed down onto him, was stressing him out within the hour. He decided to get it done in chunks; A piece of current work, a piece of the omegas’ work, and whatever he was loosely given last. Priorities. There was a possibility that he wouldn’t get the promotion, so why put the omegas’ work before everything else?

 

 

The switch between tasks was hurting his brain, and lunch couldn’t come fast enough. He shoved himself back in his chair to stretch, shutting his eyes for a few seconds. This better be worth it in the end, because he still had a few hours, and this would be the rest of his week. Sicheng eventually found his way to the break room, where he was infuriated to discover his lunch was missing. That fuel was necessary for him to keep going for the day, but he couldn’t be that mad, because nobody knew about this promotion, thus, taking his lunch seemed inconsequential. He shrugged it off as nothing, so as not to stress himself out more. There was a cafe right down the block, and he would be able to make it and bring it back to eat, maybe. If all else failed, he would be working with one hand for a while. On his way out, he was stopped.

 

 

“Hey, Winwin!”

 

 

He turned around, and it was Yuta. He had forgotten all about Yuta, and the incident at the club. Sicheng physically groaned and stopped in his tracks for him. “I have to go and grab lunch really quick, so either you’re coming with me, or you’re going to wait.”

 

 

“Oh, well, two of the alphas was out today, and we ordered the usual. There’s extra food, if you want.” Yuta offered.

 

 

“That would be nice. Plus, you owe me.” He sighed in relief. His brain was too frazzled to turn down any sort of aid. Yuta led him over to the break room, where the alphas’ table was replenished once again, most likely after all the omegas and betas had left.

 

 

“Here you go,” Yuta grabbed an empty takeout box type container and handed it to him. “Help yourself. Like I said, we have more than usual. Pretty sure nobody will mind since you’re an alpha.”

 

 

“You sure do get fed well,” Sicheng started picking out various vegetables and meats and toppings to add to his bowl, also ignoring his quip. “Must be nice to work with the alphas.”

 

 

“Well, we’re pretty much the head of house, under the boss,” He shrugged.

 

 

He had never thought of it like that… Just as in society, alphas ruled all, and were treated with the utmost respect. Here, that was the same, with the added addition that they get paid more. The work force was a cruel hierarchy.

 

 

“You looked really nice on Friday,” Yuta stepped away from him slightly to get more food.

 

 

“Thanks,” Sicheng breathed out and swallowed. “You too. How’s Jaehyun?”

 

 

“Good. I had to keep him under control. We weren’t the greatest of friends before, but we’re closer. He’s a bit of a wild card, you know? So… Who did you come with?”

 

 

“Renjun. He’s one of the alphas, and he was with some of his friends, that had tagged along,” He swallowed.

 

 

“Oh! Renjun. I didn’t know you two were friends. He always takes my work to go get double checked in your offices. Thanks, by the way. I can’t figure stuff out sometimes, so I just send it to one of the editors,” Yuta chuckled. “He’s really nice, I like him.”

 

 

“Yup,” Sicheng was having a nice time picking out what he wanted to eat, but then remembered that he had a lot of work to do, some of which could be knocked out right now. “I appreciate this gesture, but I have to go. Editor stuff, you know?” He closed the container and let out a stressed breath as he backed out of the room.

 

 

“Mhm, you go ahead. Wouldn’t want food to go to waste, or for you to be any grumpier, so it’s my pleasure,” Yuta waved him off.

 

 

He mentally cursed his newfound social awkwardness. Without being constantly snarky and on his toes, it was difficult to do so, and not show the vulnerability that his personality contained, ie, not be himself. It created an anxious disposition that felt embarrassing to even think about. Yuta’s presence was, for lack of a better word, overwhelming, more so than he had initially felt. What was so different now? Was he so focused on being an alpha before that he had blocked out the natural distinctive traits that Yuta was given as an alpha?

 

 

Sicheng set the container aside on his desk, getting a head start on writing articles to be edited. There weren’t many topics, but one would take him a whole day to curate, and give or take another few hours to go over it and make sure that it was solid enough to go through the editing process. The editing process? That was his job. He would be critiquing and editing his own articles. At least it wasn’t up to him to finalize them.

 

 

In the middle of his article on self care and food intake, there was a knock on his door. “Come in!” He didn’t look up from his computer, and continued to type when he did look up. “What are you doing in here?”

 

 

“I couldn’t help but notice,” Yuta said, waving a fork back and forth between his fingers, “But you forgot this.”

 

 

“I wouldn’t have noticed,” He removed his fingers from the keys and covered his face. “Thank you.”

 

 

“I  _ also _ couldn’t help but notice that there is nobody else in this wing. What work are you working on?” The alpha flipped and chair around and sat down, scanning the desk that was neatly chaotic, covered in his stacks of papers. It was baffling how this was the 21st century, yet they still used so much paper.

 

 

“Work,” Sicheng resumed his typing. It was slower, now that Yuta was here and his focus was thrown way off. Renjun’s words had come to his mind concerning him and Yuta, and he was trying his best to push them away for the sake of his job. How well could someone ignore an alpha, though?

 

 

“I see you have a black folder there,” Yuta smirked. “When are you moving into our wing?”

 

 

“What? It’s just a folder.”

 

 

“See, I don’t even have to look into that folder to know that you are being overloaded with work as a test. All the alphas clued me in on how this building works. The boss color codes her folders. Black is only special assignments, which almost always equal promotion or pay raise, or both. And, I’m pretty sure you should be in the alpha wing. Don’t you know that? You’ve been working here longer than me.”

 

 

“I prefer to pay attention on the work itself rather than the color of the folder it’s in.” He huffed. “You’re distracting me, you know.”

 

 

“How much work?” Yuta ignored him and picked up the folder. “Wow, this has to be at least half of the alpha’s work.”

 

 

“It’s five percent of the omega’s work, if you must know,” Sicheng crossed his arms. “The rest is extra work that alphas like  _ you _ pass down onto me.”

 

 

“Oof, sorry,” He raised his eyebrows. “You should let me edit some. Then you just worry about editing, as per usual. Editing can’t be as time consuming as making the betas’ far fetched and broad ideas into feasible articles that the public will eat up.”

 

 

“Why would I risk you messing up my promotion, Yuta?” He squinted his eyes at him.

 

 

“You know, I was hired as an alpha. I have the qualifications to edit. Not trying to degrade you, or anything, but we’re on the same level, now that you’re being considered for a promotion. Plus.. I still owe you dearly for assuming that you’re an awful person and breaking your nose.”

 

 

“I forgot all about that first part, and those involved, thanks for bringing it back to my mind,” Sicheng gave him a fake grin and rolled his eyes. “Fine. You can edit my actual work, so that I can have more time to get the articles done efficiently and not have to lose sleep over this.”

 

 

“Can do,” Yuta gave him a thumbs up, before leaving the room.

 

 

Sure, Yuta owed him, but this would be a giant favor that he would owe him for. If this was executed properly, and Yuta really was the stellar editor that he claimed to be, he would be getting a raise and a complete status upgrade. Was that really enough to make things even?

 

 

When he returned, he pushed his things aside so that Yuta could put his laptop on the desk and help, effectively. “Here, this pile is roughly my work. I might have mixed it up with the extra work when I just shoved everything over..” Sicheng groaned and covered his face again. He jumped when Yuta grabbed his hand a moment later, however. “What the f - fuck, Yuta, stop!” It made him conflicted how his heart had jumped when their palms touched.

 

 

“You have a paper cut, I was confirming it,” He pointed to the cut on his thumb.

 

 

“I have band - aids,” Sicheng swallowed and opened his drawer. “We work in an office, at desk jobs, so I’m prepared.” He wiped it off before covering it up. “Thanks. I wouldn’t want to have papers with blood all over them.

 

 

“I think you just need to calm down.” Yuta pushed his computer shut. “Eat some of the food I so gratefully let you have.”

 

 

“Maybe you’re right, but in the fact that I haven’t eaten and that I might be delirious,” He huffed. “Get to work,  _ intern _ .”

 

 

Yuta ignored his remark and got back to attending the work he handed him. There was a smug smirk on his face. For a moment, he considered retracting his snarky statement and saying something nice, but then he realized that might be flirty. He did, too, because his eyes flickered up and he wiggled his eyebrows at him. Sicheng huffed again and started stuffing his mouth with food, flustered. As much as he wanted help, lord was it hard not to succumb to his unintentional alpha charms.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> see, it might be a little confusing, but to those who are (i might explain this in a future chapter) sicheng sees alphas as high and mighty, and yuta is such an alpha that he was both threatened and intimidated. so, he would be defensive because he was more 'alpha' than him, but was also like omg drool what an alpha. i hope that makes sense with the rise of this new relationship
> 
> my apologies if the events seem like they're speeding up at a weird pace, but we're reaching vital plot points so everything might seem super fast. also, sorry i haven't been uploading right on fridays as i usually do, i haven't been feeling up to life as of lately so the process of making these chapters has been slower, but writing makes me happy :) all your comments and support make my heart BURST <333


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oh, where one's intrigue can take them.

Yuta wishes that he could say that him and Winwin were on good terms. After the whole ordeal with Taeyong, he wanted it to go away as soon as possible. Clearly, that relationship would go nowhere, and he was too invested to continue it knowing that things were that way. Taeyong had told him that he was far too naive to be a proper alpha, and that he was so stereotypical. It was beyond upsetting to know that someone whomst he claimed to love at one point felt so strongly about him.

 

 

Winwin wasn’t a bad person. Yuta was sure that there was a valid reason for his behavior, and he knew that it had to be drastic. After breaking his nose, he really didn’t want to be the subject of his threats and spiteful remarks. He was mostly aiming that anger at him because of Taeyong, because although he had gotten angry at him, he had thought it wasn’t his fault. Now, he knew that it was Winwin who was the victim here, it changed it altogether. He had never actually seen them together, which made it easier to talk to him without perceiving him as his ex’s lover..

 

 

Within their time apart, it gave him lots of time to observe. It seemed that, after the two of them had been through it, that he was changing as a person. He heard his name more frequently around the office, especially in the alpha wing for editing reasons. More often than not, he would pass by rooms that he would be in, and notice subtle differences in his appearance - or maybe he was going crazy. Was his skin glowing more than usual? Did this lips look more plump than before? Since when were his eyes that sharp? He didn’t bother to look into it, but couldn’t help but wonder if he was going through what he should. Shouldn’t he be the one distraught over Taeyong? Yuta should be going through an identity crisis, and feeling as though he should be attracting others. Were they that invested?

 

 

The next day that he had agreed to help Winwin, he was intrigued to see Renjun and him talking for the first time he had seen. It was interesting to know that they were close when all he knew to be his friend was Jungwoo and Doyoung, and certainly was a drastic difference. Renjun was quite the character.

 

 

“Should I see myself out? I just came to grab some work,” Yuta had gotten a coffee for Winwin to fuel him through his work.

 

 

“Renjun can leave. We weren’t talking about anything important, anyways,” He huffed at him.

 

 

The two suddenly started bickering in a completely different language, and he just nodded. Instead of leaving, he acted quietly in getting to a folder with his name on it out of a stack with various others. “Good getting this organized,” He chuckled under his breath. The coffee was simply rested on the desk aside from the papers, and he idled by editing whilst they continued to talk.

 

 

He heard mentions of his name, very briefly and hard to catch. If anyone knew about the whole Taeyong situation, it was Winwin’s friends, so he wouldn’t be surprised if they were talking on and on about that mess.

 

 

“Make conversation with him or I’ll come back here and yell at you,” Renjun said out of the blue, for both of them to hear.

 

 

Yuta looked up at him when Renjun left the room. “Getting forced to socialize?”

 

 

“I have work to do.”

 

 

“Multitask. We wouldn’t want a feral alpha running around the office due to stress. Talking does wonders for the soul..” Yuta stretched out his arms before setting his laptop in his lap. “Is it just me, or have you been cleaning up better lately?”

 

 

“Excuse me?” Winwin was shooting daggers in his direction.

 

 

“I’m  _ complimenting _ you. You’ve been looking much nicer lately. Glowy, expressive, I don’t know,” He looked away. “Maybe it’s a change of mood, or you are putting in more effort, but it’s a good thing, trust me.”

 

 

There was a good few seconds of silence, and he regretted firing a compliment so harshly at him. He was being a bit aggressive, and defensive, and impolite. Who could blame him? Winwin gave off a nervous atmosphere that made it hard to give compliments, and he wanted it to get through to him. If Yuta didn’t naturally possess the courage to be bold, he wouldn’t be able to say a word to him. The intimidation came from the fact that Winwin possessed the exact same thing.

 

 

“I’ve been trying,” Winwin looked down and had a slight pout to hide a smile. “We’ve got to attract a mate somehow.”

 

 

“I don’t know who ‘we’ is,” Yuta raised his eyebrows and pursed his lips.

 

 

“Okay, that was uncalled for,” He grimaced at him. “Maybe you need to clean up. Get a haircut.”

 

 

“Ah, but my long, luscious locks are what bring the omegas in.” It was getting notably longer as the days went on, and required more meticulous styling. There was something about it that added pep in his step and gave him a flair of charm. “Clean cut is  _ your _ thing.”

 

 

“I’ll take the compliment and leave the rest,” Winwin took a drink of coffee. “This is really sweet.”

 

 

“Is that a bad thing?” Yuta filed through his stack of papers to find another article to edit. “You look gentle, and those who look gentle always like sweet things. There’s probably more sugar and creamer in there than anything.”

 

 

“I don’t look soft and gentle, I’m intimidating!” He shouted over the desk.

 

 

“You are.” To be fair, he jumped internally at that. His fluffy look didn’t do anything to tone down his temper. “But only when you’re angry. It’s hard to take you seriously, Bokki.” Yuta poked his cheek with the butt of a pen that was lying on the desk.

 

 

Winwin turned red - with anger, clearly. “Do not compare my chiseled face with tteokbokki!” He breathed out through his nostrils.

 

 

“How angry would you be if I continued to call you Bokki, hm?”

 

 

“Don’t you dare,” He gave him a  _ very _ threatening snarl and turned back to his work.

 

 

Rather than making him angry, maybe he could make him happier. It was with lighthearted intentions to call him that, but he had gotten upset. Every time that the two were fighting - or, rather, Winwin was shouting at him - it was over the state of his class. Winwin was desperate to maintain this manly, intimidating alpha figure, when that wasn’t necessary. He wanted to see him be an alpha, but he wanted him to be himself; Even if that true self was a squishy faced fiend.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yuta's already whipped for the soft look and honestly i don't blame him. i can say that it's pretty easy to tell how this chapter would have been from sicheng's perspective since we've seen him in this situation before (sort of). and yeah, him and renjun were fighting like children over talking to yuta and being alone with him lol


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> dangerous acts and the like.
> 
> !! tw for violence bc doyoung likes fighting sicheng apparently !!

Sicheng wasn’t going to lie, he was terrified. Renjun had left him high and dry to hang out with one of the J’s, without any form of support as he got ready. He had pulled out one of his favourite shirts that he had never worn. It was a cool pastel pink and had the Vans logo on the front, and he wore a normal pair of jeans with it. This might possibly be the most  _ him  _ he had been in a long time. To compliment it, he wore simple eyeshadow and lip tint. As much as he wanted to be happy about how good he looked right now, he was shaky and anxious. His ass was grass, as far as he was concerned. Mark this down as one of the most terrifying experiences of his life.

 

 

He sat down in his car and blasted the air conditioning to make sure that he didn’t pass out, for the most part. How would he even bring this to the table? This wasn’t a subject that he could just slide into conversation and glaze over. Tonight might turn into another brawl whereas he was on the short end of the stick, if he didn’t play his cards right..

 

 

“Hello?” Sicheng breathed out the second he answered his phone. It rang, and he was so on edge that he didn’t skip a beat in picking it up.

 

 

_ ‘Hey, Winwin, are you on your way?’ _

 

 

“Yup, I just started driving. Do you need anything? Do I need to stop at the store?”

 

 

_ ‘No. I just wanted to make sure you’re okay with tension, because, you know, Doyoung still isn’t thrilled. I love you, but he’s still really pissed at you.’ _

 

 

“Oh, yeah, I know. I know,” He grimaced to himself. “Don’t worry about me. I’m no threat, and he’ll see that. Things will go smoothly. I promise. I’m not trying to get my nose broken again, Woo.”

 

 

_ ‘I know, I’m just worr-’ _

 

 

“I’ll see you in a little bit, okay? Stop worrying about me.”

 

 

-

 

 

Seeing the both of them was like a fever dream, after being apart for so long, and leaving off on such odd measures. Doyoung had waved at him timidly, which meant Jungwoo had most likely screamed at him and whipped him into shape after their phone call. He had also never seen his apartment, which seemed more like Jungwoo’s more than anything.

 

 

“I had Doyoung make something for me, because I was too exhausted. It’s something you like, though,” He smiled. “Just might taste a little different.”

 

 

“I don’t mind,” Sicheng adjusted his sweater. “Thanks, Doyoung.”

 

 

“Anything for my omega,” Doyoung wrapped an arm around Jungwoo's shoulders and kissed the side of his head. The air was void of any sort of happiness despite that affectionate statement. It was good, though, that their relationship was thriving.  All three of them sat down to eat right after that. He really wished that he had someone by his side; Essentially being the third wheel at a dinner that was meant to be for all three of them collectively was something that he couldn’t have despised more.

 

 

“So…” Sicheng was gazing at his food before he took a bite. “Are you guys mated yet?”

 

 

“No,” Jungwoo pursed his lips and shoved a forkful in his mouth. Bad first subject, apparently.

 

 

“We’re going to mate soon, though-”

 

 

“No we’re not.” Sicheng felt Jungwoo bump his boyfriend with his foot under the table. “We’re not mating any time soon.”

 

 

“We’re mating soon.” Doyoung growled. It concerned him that something that was to be regarded as warm and romantic was a taboo topic in this household. That had asserted his dominance against the omegas in the room, who were silent out of fear of angering the strongest one in the room.

 

 

Sicheng was not, however, a simple omega, and had been through the ringer when it came to Doyoung. He had nothing to be intimidated by. “I thought the whole purpose of you moving out was to mate. Why haven’t you guys mated yet?” His tone was safe, so as not to stir the pot any further.

 

 

“Because of you,” Jungwoo spat at him, but immediately recoiled with regret. “God, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to spew it out like that.”

 

 

“You can’t change how you feel.” He said blankly. “I was a huge, awful sore on your relationship. I held you back. I made Doyoung feel like shit unintentionally. You wanted to be there for me, and to be fair, I needed you there.” The night had suddenly turned serious far before he had foreseen it to. In his mind, that was a positive, because he would be able to end things sooner. The downside was that he would not be able to enjoy any part of the night with him. “I’m a fucking awful person, and I know that.”

 

 

“Y-”

 

 

“I don’t want to hear it from you, Doyoung,” Sicheng squinted at him. “I’ve heard enough from you to last me an entire lifetime. Let my best friend speak for himself. I want to hear it from his lips. Why haven’t you mated yet?”

 

 

“Because, Sicheng!” Jungwoo stood up and shook the table. “Because-!” He slammed on the table, about to explode. His face was red and about to burst with tears. Of course he knew why. His secret was putting a strain on  _ their _ relationship, because he wanted to be there for him, and Doyoung didn’t know why, and it was going to tear them apart it if kept on going. “I’m scared to mate, and you- Connect the fucking pieces, Sicheng.” His boyfriend wrapped an arm around him and rubbed his back.

 

 

He buried his face in his hands. If they mated, and this continued to go on, they were as good as exes. “So what else am I missing out on?” Doyoung stood up. Here comes trouble. “What the fuck have you done, you son of a bitch?” The alpha lunged forward to grab him, but he stood up. It did no good, because he was up and after him, pinning him to the wall with his hands around his neck.

 

 

“No, no, no, Doyoung-” Sicheng gasped for remnants of air.

 

 

“Doyoung, let him go, oh my god,” Jungwoo screamed in an all too familiar voice and clawed at his arms and hands, leaving visible marks behind. “Doyoung, please!”

 

 

Doyoung throttled him by the neck and he choked. He might die at the hands of an alpha tonight if he didn’t play his cards right, and for the second time, at that. An alpha who was willing to kill for his mate? Lord knows he wouldn’t be stepping foot in this apartment any time soon. “Stop, stop-! Oh my god, I - I’ll tell you- Doyoung-”

 

 

He was thrown to the ground - thankfully, hitting the carpet and not the tile - and looked down upon. “Tell me, motherfucker.”

 

 

“You know what, I’ll just show you.” Sicheng reached into his pocket for his wallet and pulled out his ID. “Here. Read the entire thing.” He handed it to him. Doyoung’s eyes scanned over his birthdate, his birthplace, his full name, address, gender…

 

 

“What the fuck kind of fake ID is this?” He tossed it back in his face. “Who are you trying to fool, being an omega?”

 

 

“If it was fake, why would everything else be correct, you idiot!” Sicheng stood up and shoved him. “It’s because I  _ am  _ an omega.” His anxiousness was boiling over into anger. “I’ve been my entire life, but guess what? I’ve wanted to fucking hide it. I’m not respected, I don’t get regarded as highly, I’m not deserving, as an omega. Your boyfriend has done such a good job keeping me together, and you’ve done nothing but make him feel guilty for it, and the same goes for me. I feel like shit, Doyoung, standing here, in your apartment, knowing that I’ve essentially ruined your lives for the longest time. Do you know how hard this is for me?” He took in a deep breath so that he didn’t start sobbing. “Now you know. Now you can wipe everything about me from your mind and act like I never existed. Have a good time mating and living without me.”

 

 

Jungwoo was in absolute shock, standing by idly without a clue as to what to say or do. “S - Sicheng…”

 

 

He grimaced at the both of them and turned around to leave. “Fuck off,” The arm that grabbed him was torn off, and his speed was increased.

 

 

“I’m sorry-”

 

 

“Fuck you both,” Sicheng sobbed out. “Hate me. Forget about me. I don’t care. There’s your reason. I just told you to go fuck yourselves. I’m leaving.” He finally left them in disbelief and silence, contradictory to the last time. It felt like his lungs were going to collapse in on themselves and his organs were going to fail. His secret had gone farther than he had ever thought, destroying his best friend’s life and leaving a messy trail in his wake. It was hard to drive home when all he wanted to do was lie on the ground and cry.

 

 

-

 

 

The next week or so, he was an absolute mess. He woke up sweating profusely from anxiety, and his phone was dead almost every morning, and stayed off for days. Only one was taken care of; A shower, hopefully would wash away all of his worries for the day. He still hadn’t heard back from the boss about his promotion days later, and he was so thankful that it was asked of him before this whole ordeal. It felt like his brain was liquid, walking into the office.

 

 

Yuta was still helping him, since he had fallen into a slump of making mistakes in editing. His alpha pride was too strong to let Sicheng fail in front of his eyes, apparently, and he didn’t think much of it at all.

 

 

“Hey, Winwin,” Yuta slowly opened the door, returning from getting lunch. “I know you said not to spend any money, so I brought you extras from the break room. They had protein bowls, and I think you need that right now.”

 

 

“Ugh,” Winwin sat up. “Thanks.”

 

 

The two of them laid back in their chairs, eating in silence, before Yuta decided to speak. “You know, Winwin, I really want to know if you’re okay. You look really.. Sluggish, as of late. It’s worrying, because you’re usually a force to be reckoned with.”

 

 

“I’ve just been having a hard time with the whole existential crisis thing,” He shook his head. “My life purpose is dwindling away, and I’m trying to keep it here.”

 

 

“Oh…”

 

 

“Yeah, I know, it’s heavy. I just gave you the brief thesis of it all. I don’t want to talk about it, Yuta, but I really appreciate you,” Sicheng shoved more food into his mouth. “I’m a horrible person for thinking any less of you.”

 

 

The door opened, and they turned to look at the person who poked their head in. “O - Oh, hello, what brings you down here?”

 

 

The boss smiled and stepped into the room. “I’m here to congratulate you. You’ve got the promotion, so you can start moving offices today.” She quietly clapped her hands in celebration. A wink was given, since she knew that Yuta wasn’t aware of how big this was.

 

 

“Oh my god,” Sicheng buried his face in his hands and took in a deep breath. “Thank you so much.”

 

 

“It’s my pleasure. You’d better help your new coworker get adjusted, Yuta,” She nudged him before leaving to attend to her busy schedule.

 

 

“Yeah!” Yuta leaned over the desk and shook his shoulders in excitement. “You got it! You’ve been promoted! I’m so happy for you, Winwin!” He was beaming at him. “Those better be happy tears, or else.”

 

 

“They are- I’m not going to cry!” Winwin scoffed. “Just start helping me move, dumbass.”

 

 

-

 

 

It took less than an hour to get all of his things up to the alpha wing, which was certainly not in the place that he thought it was. He had thought that it was just across the way, but that was the omegas and partially the betas. The alphas were all the way upstairs, on the same floor as the boss. That meant that every time Yuta had come to do something for him, he had taken the elevator and walked to his office. He hated that it had made him smile just thinking that he had been trying to make up for the whole incident that much.

 

 

“The offices may be smaller, but they are much more snug and comfortable. The furniture is nicer, too. Not to mention, the elevator goes straight down to the break room, and there’s another one that goes to the exit,” Yuta was sitting in one of his nice, new client chairs.

 

 

“Nice,” He turned around, happy as ever.

 

 

“You know,” Yuta was biting his lip and tilting his head at him. “This might be the first time I’ve seen you genuinely smile at me. It’s very strange and beautiful.”

 

 

“Well, you helped me. And, I’ve just gotten the first promotion I’ve got in years. This is big, too, because I’m actually in the alpha wing, now,” Sicheng covered his mouth. “Stop staring at me like that, especially. You’re going to be seeing my face a lot more, now, so there’s no need to keep a mental image.”

 

 

“Are we friends, Winwin?”

 

 

He was taken aback by the question. They had been through a fair bit, together, both negative and positive. But, he still felt like he was a stranger. Yuta was intimidating, and as far as he was concerned, still one of those people that he grouped with Jaehyun, and Johnny, and Ten. Was that a good thing? Absolutely not. “W - Well… We’re acquaintances.”

 

 

“You might as well call me a work colleague, Yuta looked over into Sicheng’s bag. “Your phone is going nuts.”

 

 

Sicheng rushed over to turn it back off, since he had finally decided to plug it into the wall and charge it. He was met with a million texts and calls from Jungwoo, a fair amount from Doyoung, and other normal ones. Renjun and him had spoken after he forcibly came into his office a day after the dinner, kicked out Yuta, and demanded that he talk to him. There were no texts from him, only a missed call. His voicemail was probably overflowing with laments.

 

 

“You seem like you could really use a friend, right now,” He leaned back in his chair and nudged him. “One that will make you forget about everything with food and movies.”

 

 

“I don’t know why you want to be my friend so desperately,” Sicheng sat down against the wall invitingly. “But I think I want to, also.”

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its 3am when im posting this haha im so tired bc im sick
> 
> don't worry this is the last angry doyoung chapter (for now at least) but he knows!! this is also a sort of renjun centric chapter bc we all need more renjun in our lives (also no this is not stereotypical sassy omega hyuck... You Shall See)


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> new perspectives.

As of recently, Renjun had appointed himself as Sicheng’s personal therapist and life coach. He was fully aware that he hadn’t been there for his struggles and would never feel the way that Jungwoo did to him, but still insisted that he assist him. When it went too deep for him, he would flip the situation on him and his personal troubles. Since they were two different people, their combative attitudes came out more often than not.

 

 

“Just because I’m an alpha, that doesn’t mean anything!” Renjun paced around the kitchen for the millionth time.

 

 

Sicheng moved out of his way from where he stood at the stove. “That is such an insult, you know that, right?”

 

 

“I’m serious!” He grumbled. “Jaemin is a beta. Jeno is also an alpha. It’ll just be like a normal relationship, but easier. We’ll be together, and have sex, and adopt a child! Maybe things will be a little different with Jaemin, since he has some omega in him. It changes everything, I guess.”

 

 

“You are being so fucking-” His stirring momentarily stopped. “Closed minded. Stereotypical. Don’t mess with class, Renjun, because things go wrong very quick. Class seeps through everything, and no matter how hard you try, it will come through. And your stereotypical shit, like calling Jaemin a half omega rather than a  _ beta  _ makes me want to punch you in the face. Stop thinking like that!”

 

 

Renjun huffed and leaned against the counter. “Is it really that bad?”

 

 

“Yes! All of you fucking alphas…” Sicheng irritatedly turned back to the food.

 

 

“I’m sorry,” He covered his face. “Is this the type of stuff that made you the way you are?”

 

 

“I’m not in the mood. You are not turning this on me. Conversation over.” There was no doubt in his mind that he knew that all alphas thought like this, and hearing it from Renjun’s own alpha mind only proved this to be common knowledge. He was strongly against what he was saying which, ironically, made him group alphas all in the same category.

 

 

“Dong Sicheng… Please don’t be like this, I was ignorant.”

 

 

“You’re still ignorant until further notice.” Sicheng turned around and huffed angrily at him. “You can serve yourself.”

 

 

Renjun groaned. “You’re a feisty omega, and I know that for sure.”

 

 

-

 

 

“Have you seen who’s taking over your place?” Yuta was walking him to his office. “All the alphas are running to go help him, it’s chaos.”

 

 

“Then why aren’t you?” Sicheng stopped in front of his office.

 

 

“Not my type.” He shrugged it off. “Seriously, though. I’m pretty sure he was considered the second that you were considered for a promotion. Says a lot, too. Omegas come once in a blue moon, especially like him.”

 

 

“Are you sure he isn’t your type?”

 

 

“Maybe he’s your type,” Yuta chuckled. “See you whenever.”

 

 

Sicheng scoffed and closed the door behind him. What did this omega have that was making all the alphas in the office crazy? It piqued his interest, since he was looking to be like that. He wanted to be that omega. For now, he couldn’t let himself be distracted by another omega again. Omegas were trouble on their own, and he could say that from both experience and from being one.

 

 

His new position made it seem like there was not as much work as before, but at the same time, it carried a heavier weight. He was one of the final processes before the articles would either be posted or go out to print. Just the thought of that was stressful enough. The alphas were the only employees who worked on the website, aside from the higher ups. If he was open about being an omega, he would be celebrated to the highest extent for such a thing, as he was with the boss. It kept running through his mind every time he turned to his work.

 

 

“Sicheng!” Renjun stormed into his office. “Have you seen the new omega?”

 

 

“Oh my god, I just got to my work,” He mumbled. “No, Renjun, I have not.”

 

 

“He just radiates the most attractive energy, it’s like he has pheromones or something-”

 

 

Before he could sit down or interrupt his work, he started pushing him out. “I just got this position, you are not going to throw me off just because you are chasing yet another guy that is apparently just as attractive as every other guy that you come to talk to me about.” On his way out, he bumped into someone.

 

 

“Oh, hi,” He grinned at him. Renjun shoved Sicheng aside and stood up straight, and he could only assume that this was the omega that he was talking about. “Which one of you have I filled in for?”

 

 

While Renjun was fawning over him, he attempted to have an actual conversation. “That would be me. Glad you haven’t said  _ replaced _ , like everyone else.”

 

 

“Well, I respect you, since you’re higher up than me. I’m still pretty good, if I filled your shoes.” He smiled to himself. “I’m Donghyuck. I presume that we won’t be seeing each other often.”

 

 

“I won’t be dropping my work load onto you, so no,” He shook his head. “Pretty sure you’ll be seeing a lot of the other alphas, though.”

 

 

“Oh, so not you?” Donghyuck pouted. “Thought you would be stopping by every day, just like everyone else.”

 

 

“Not my type,” Sicheng grinned. “Have you been shown around yet, or no?”

 

 

“If not, I’m not busy yet,” Renjun finally spoke. “I can show you around the building.”

 

 

“I appreciate the offer, but I’d rather cut my losses and not have another omega show me around,” Donghyuck smirked at Renjun. “Let’s hope that I don’t see you later, because I like your friend, and it would be a shame to see you weighing him down.”

 

 

Renjun’s jaw was on the ground as he left. “Do you see what I mean? He just degraded me!”

 

 

“Go away, I’m not encouraging this right now.” He motioned for him to leave once again. “And I’d better not find you in your office daydreaming.”

 

 

“You know what, I hope you do, and then you won’t be able to ever erase that image from your mind.” Renjun marched away, hopefully to get some work done and not actually go to his office to get lost in dirty thoughts about Donghyuck.

 

 

-

 

 

Sicheng was beyond envious of this new omega. He was powerful, and confident, and overwhelmingly captivating. Donghyuck had barely been here for but a few hours and he had the attention of every single employee in the building. If his work ethic and production compared to that of his people skills, he was truly the whole package. He’d demoted him to another one of Renjun’s love interests when he spoke, but he was the new object of his intentions. As an alpha, he wanted to be like Jaehyun. As an omega, he wanted to be like Donghyuck; Self assured and wanted by all.

 

 

“Your brain seems to be churning,” Yuta nudged him. They were sitting in the conference room where a bunch of the alphas sat and ate lunch to get out of their offices for the time being. “What are you thinking about?”

 

 

“This work is really stressful. If I mess up, it could ruin everything,” He partially lied. That was on his mind, but in his free time it was Donghyuck.

 

 

“Don’t think like that. I know that it’s like that, as an alpha in general, but of course that’s going to upset you. You’re stressing yourself out for no reason,” Yuta spouted at him. “You, of all people, don’t need to be stressed out.”

 

 

“Maybe I should have eaten with Renjun,” Sicheng rolled his eyes. “Where is he, anyways? Have you seen him?”

 

 

“There’s a chance he’s in the crowd of alphas following the new omega around. Since everyone likes to talk, I heard that he went out to lunch somewhere. Maybe he got caught up in that. I saw Renjun running to make copies, and I can guess for who.”

 

 

“Real great that he’s just become his personal assistant, now,” He sighed. “I have to deal with him, in my free time, and that’s all I’m going to be hearing about. He’s already all puppy dog eyes over two other guys. I don’t know what I’m going to do with him.”

 

 

“I thought he had a boyfriend?” Yuta perked up. “There’s someone that he goes out to lunch with, sometimes.”

 

 

“No, just one of the two guys he’s flip flopping with,” Sicheng angrily stuffed food in his mouth. “Hopefully that doesn’t become three.”

 

 

“Maybe it’ll be good if he goes after him. He’s not the most… Gullible omega. Plus, he’s really sharp tongued, and it could do Renjun some good to be rejected and taken down a notch. He could whip him into shape. I heard he’s already rejected some of the alphas, and that they’re sitting in here.” He whispered the latter half of his spiel.

 

 

Sicheng stopped eating momentarily. That might be a good idea. Renjun could experience that not all omegas were dainty beings, and that just because he was an alpha he couldn’t just play with everyone’s feelings as he pleased. It was a little mean, because Renjun was genuinely interested - not to say that everyone else wasn’t - but he deserved it after saying those stereotypical and awful things about class.

 

 

“I don’t like that look,” Yuta side eyed him.

 

 

“It’s fine, I’ll let him be. Even if I have to suffer through his gushing,” He cleared his throat. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to do anything bad. He can hang out with Donghyuck and play with him to his heart’s content. We’ll just sit back, and see how it plays out.”

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yuta is the biggest flirt sometimes i have to stop and breathe writing this... also holla for renhyuck we stan one of the best and most underrated dream ships


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> reconciliation.

Sicheng had to admit that he had been avoiding all of the phone calls and texts that were flooding his phone at first. After the initial influx, they came in a small stream at certain times. Yuta noticed them, Renjun noticed them, and he wished that he never did. The majority of them were from Jungwoo, followed by a surprising amount of attempts from Doyoung. His eye caught some of them, but more often than not he swiped them away. He wanted them to live in peace, without him, and he wouldn’t have to worry about weighing anyone down.

 

 

The previously owned room felt emptier than ever when he was home alone. Renjun didn’t come over as much as he liked, and he couldn’t even start to think about inviting Yuta over. He didn’t hesitate to glaze over many of the notifications, but knowing that there was nobody to hear him through the wall ate him up inside.

 

 

It was abrupt, calling on a Saturday afternoon, but it had to be done. Hopefully, the two lovers would be having a great time on their own, and not angry at each other on his account. Sicheng sunk back into his pillows while it rang.

 

 

_ ‘Hello?’ _ He picked up after two rings, and was notably out of breath.

 

 

“Hello?”

 

 

Jungwoo’s side of the line was silent, and so was his, yet he could still hear his breathing. Both of them were at a loss for words. He didn't have any intentions to talk to him ever again, and that was most likely starting to sink in. It was torture, knowing that they both had a million things to say but one misplaced word could ruin the situation.

 

 

The phone shuffled around. _ ‘Winwin? God, I’m so sorry, I really didn’t mean to treat you that way for so long. If I would have known, I wouldn’t have postured so much and treated you so harshly-’ _

 

 

_ ‘Give me the phone.’ _ Jungwoo took it back from Doyoung.

 

 

“That makes me feel so much worse,” Sicheng exhaled. “Have you mated yet?”

 

 

‘ _ God, that question has been so awful lately… We haven’t. It’s hard to mate when you both feel guilty. You can tell that Doyoung feels guilty _ ,’ He laughed nervously after every statement. ‘ _ I can confidently say a lot of problems have been solved, but that doesn’t mean things have suddenly drastically evolved _ .’

 

 

“It feels odd, talking to you like normal after everything I’ve done. It’s because we’re adults, I suppose. I just know that things aren’t okay. I’ve really messed up something beautiful, and I regret it. Now, things are going to take more time, for you guys, and my life has sped up a million times faster.”

 

 

‘ _ I feel awful for interrupting, but Doyoung won’t leave me alone until I let him say what he wants to say. _ ’

 

 

Sicheng swallowed and let out a breath. “Let him say what he wants to say. I owe him an apology more than anything.” Jungwoo, at least, was in the know, and knew what was wrong, but Doyoung was in the midst of the battle, defenseless and clueless.

 

 

‘ _ Winwin, I really can’t tell you how sorry I am. It’s just normal to feel threatened by another alpha. You are so close to Jungwoo, and I couldn’t stand it. Alphas are monsters, they’re harsh people sometimes, and I feel awful now that I know the truth. It was no wonder you didn’t stand up, or fight back, because you didn’t have it in you. It’s torn me up to know that I treated you like that, and that it also hurt Jungwoo. I was beyond malicious to you, and while I can’t say I would regret my actions if you were an alpha, it’s even worse that you’re not. If you were, things would be different, but they’re not. I’m not saying that I would treat you like a princess, but I certainly wouldn’t have treated you like that, not when you’ve gone through so much and you’re still going through a lot. I really want to apologize- _ ’

 

 

“No apologies needed, Doyoung. You were acting like normal. You couldn’t have known that this insane secret was behind everything, and that what you were doing was nothing but toxic, since you thought I was an alpha, and that I would be able to take it. That’s just how the world works, I guess.” He himself was a man of equal rights, but that was another discussion for another time. “You didn’t mean any of it, personally.”

 

 

‘ _ I’ve felt so guilty, I couldn’t even touch Jungwoo. I couldn’t even think of mating when I knew what I did. _ ’ There was a pause that was quickly filled before he could continue.

 

 

‘ _ Doie, you didn’t tell me that. Why would you hold that inside? _ ’

 

 

‘ _ Just know that I feel better knowing that you are willing to forgive me, and that we can live past this. Hopefully. _ ’

 

 

It was a different person on the line, apologizing and being a mature, well - mannered alpha. Doyoung really wasn’t the person he had come to know, but rather the one that Jungwoo did, and it was no wonder he was still with him. “Hello?” Sicheng broke the silence that had accumulated on the other end of the call.

 

 

‘ _ Doyoung said he’s going to lie down, _ ’ Jungwoo sighed. ‘ _ I love him so much. _ ’

 

 

“I know you do. I really called because I needed to be the one to apologize. I know that keeping my secret was one thing, but drawing it out, and going out of your way to protect it, as well as taking care of me and making sure I was okay, was a lot. I asked a lot of you. I’m sorry that I drained your life like that. You and Doyoung could have been mated forever ago, if it wasn’t for me. All this drama could have been spared. Hell, I could have even been accepting of myself by now. I held all of us back-” Sicheng held his breath to keep tears from spilling. “And I’m sorry for it. I feel awful, and I couldn’t take it anymore.”

 

 

‘ _ I wish I could say you were wrong. _ ” His voice was shaky. ‘ _ Have you been working on it? Like you said you would?’ _

 

 

“Sort of. I accidentally went out and made out with one of my coworker’s alpha friends. I completely outed myself to him. I’ve been trying to be myself and everyone has been much nicer to me. I got a promotion at work, and now I’m in the alpha wing. Yuta wants to be my friend.”

 

 

‘ _ You goddamn idiot, you made me think that all this time apart was for nothing! You make all of that sound so nonchalant but that’s more than you’ve done your entire life, Sicheng! Be happier about it!’ _

 

 

“That’s besides the point. I’m trying my best to get better at life, and now it’s your turn. Next time I see you, you’d better be all marked up and reeking of Doyoung,” Sicheng’s tone was pointed. “I’ve got this burden off my shoulders, and we’re getting better. Go get your knot, Woo.”

 

 

‘ _ You are beyond lucky that Doyoung has left the room, he would lose his mind if he heard you say that, _ ’ Jungwoo scoffed. ‘ _ I’m gonna go lay down with him. I’ll talk to you whenever. See you.’ _

 

 

The phone cut off, and he snapped back into his surroundings. Their bond was too strong for this. Though the very thing that had kept them together had almost torn them apart, there was no breaking how close they were and how they wanted nothing but good intentions for one another. That phone call could have gone on for hours, he was sure of it, but the two lovers were desperate for each other. Sicheng and Jungwoo’s relationship was fine - no need to fix something that wasn’t broken. He was sure that they would be busy for the rest of the night, making up for lost time. Sicheng was now content, happy that him and his best friend hadn’t fallen out forever, and that they - now including Doyoung -were all well on their way to living like normal friends.

 

 

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLOOOOOO im not dead. not a lot of you look at my twitter but ive been swamped with school and stress and i just recently caught up on sleep i was a MESS and i hope this chapter suffices bc i dont remember writing it at all omfg. i cherish you all and i sincerely hope that i can continue to serve with this story muah


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> update on the fic as it is

good morrow all, i have come bearing news. so, as i wrote this, i think i had written like 10 chapters before i wrote this, and i didn't have much afterwards. basically, i've been pushing out updates without thinking what comes next and i ??? don't really know how to get it from here to the future events that will tie up the story. this story really requires a lot of thought and a lot of character development (i.e. not a lot of yuwin) which i don't think people want??? idk i havent been getting a lot of feedback and this story in particular hasn't been thriving so i'm not sure how the audience feels,, yes, it is the second most popular work of mine, but i feel like people are clicking for the yuwin tag and don't like what they're getting. my idea is solid, but i don't know how people like the plot- if i deleted the first chapter, i would lose a hell of a lot of hits.

 

i could go on forever but what i'm saying is that until maybe the new year i'm putting this fic on hiatus to step back and evaluate it and maybe make it better suited for what y'all want bc i'm not having the  _greatest_ time writing this fic rn and it's frustrating bc my other fic (sclera), i'm having such a blast writing and people love it no matter what and i'm stuck on this one for multiple reasons. for y'all who are still reading (this fic or this letter, either is much appreciated), i promise better for this fic. i write for the story, but i feel discouraged, and i need a break from this universe. if you like my writing or wanna read more stuff, i can recommend my other fics. thanks for bearing with me, the rest of this "chapter" is just going to be the plots of my current fics and upcoming ones which i like a lot and highly recommend :)

 

"nct oneshots!" - my collection of oneshots, fluffy and smutty, with various ships. (1k words per chapter)

 

"sclera" - jaemin, a black eyed boy, finds love with the confident new kid, jeno. (recurring fic)

 

"1+1=0" - donghyuck is in love with mark, and taeil is always there to be his shoulder to cry on; which only contributes to the complications. (4 chapter mini fic)

 

"dry my eyes, bring color to my skies" - doyoung cheers up his recently laid off boyfriend, taeyong, on their anniversary. (longish oneshot)

 

"i'm falling" - a chronicling of johnny and jaehyun's memories together, from when they met to them moving in together. (short story with a surprise ending + bonus chapter)

 

"limitless" - a sweet oneshot where jungwoo surprises doyoung about his pregnancy. (yes, it is abo, and yes, it has mpreg)

 

"fiend infatuation" - doyoung meets succubus jungwoo and falls in love with him. (7 chapter mini fic)

 

"warming up (on the inside)" - jisung confesses his love to chenle the best that he can; and it turns out that he was worried for nothing. (2 chapter mini fic)

 

"ID: the skies have been gloomier" - taeyong laments about the reality of being a leader. (angst oneshot, set in the idol universe)

 

"starlight" - mark can't keep his mermaid boyfriend, donghyuck, away from the ocean, but at the same time, donghyuck can't keep himself away from mark. (sort of angst in the middle, oneshot)

 

"bloom bloom" - as one of the tags says: 'the dojae as disney fairies au literally nobody asked for' (oneshot)

 

"lover's exchange" - domestic life with johnny and ten; also an excerpt from a fic that i will never post bc it was bad idea (oneshot)

 

"ID: taeil is the best hyung" - aka marcie gushes over taeil and donghyuck's friendship in 1034 words. (oneshot)

 

"doll parts" - jaehyun is a living doll, who just wants love from the world. johnny may or may not be willing to give it to him. (recurring fic)

 

UPCOMING

 

johndo drag au (no title yet) - whereas johnny and doyoung are drag queens. that is all. (oneshot)

 

dowoo hanahaki fic (has a title that i will not reveal) - when separated by friends, one may fall ill. (hehehehe...)

 

(this is just what i have written i have so much more ;) )

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I'm Marcie! If you want to follow me / talk to me / stalk me / roleplay (i rp bts and nct pls rp with me lmao) my twitter is [here](https://twitter.com/marcieuwu) , my curiouscat (to leave me feedback and suggestions) is [here](https://curiouscat.me/femmeyong) , and my kakaotalk is marciexbam! :)
> 
> Enjoy my works! x


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